Tuesday, March 31, 2009
Night Woes
I'm afraid we bought the wrong bed.
The first large purchase the ear doctor and I made together a little over 2 years ago was our expensive, designer king sized bed. It was luscious with the pillow top and pretty gold embroidery. In the store it seemed to promise years of restful slumber. I had visions of the two of us swathed in white silk pajamas sleeping on angelic clouds.
My dreams have not been met and I'm getting really ticked that we spent such a bundle of our beautiful and fleeting wedding gift money.
As I sat up in bed the radio commercial for the sleep number bed flitted through the transoms of my mind. Oh, how glorious would it be to simply pump more air into this bed to get a firmer, more supportive base? How dreamy to be able to fiddle around every night until the perfect combination was met?
But that ideal will not be ours for years to come. How, dear friends, do I remedy this situation. My uber expensive, big, soft bed-of-my-dreams is TOO soft. My spine has turned into a noodle. HELP!
Friday, March 27, 2009
Reality Check
Mac & Cheese.
Honestly, if I didn't think my weight would balloon up to a million pounds I think I might eat Mac & Cheese everyday. I love it so much that I find it impossible to not use capital letters when writing it out. mac and cheese....not nearly dignified as this delicious delicacy requires.
When my casserole dish filled with baked, spicy Mac & Cheese arrived I took one bite and I was in heaven. But upon taking the second bite I thought to myself, "well, this is good, but it sure could use a little salt"
Looking around on our table I realized there was no salt. Thinking that, perhaps we were just seated at the single, forgotten, salt-free table I scanned the dining room to locate my seasoning of choice.
It was nowhere to be found.
Honestly, I think not providing salt and pepper table side is about the most cocky thing a restaurant can do. Do they really think that every single night, ever single chef on the line is seasoning things perfectly? I can guarantee that,unless you are a 5 star restaurant, they are not.
So freakin get yourself a slice of humble pie and put a shaker or two on the table!
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
One or the other
Almost every morning of my married life I have awoken to the ear doctor's shell-shocked expression and the re-telling of a mid-night horror story starring yours truly.
Sometimes I'm told about how I fell asleep on the couch at 9:45 and at 10:34 I woke up, gave him the death stare and in a seemingly irritated fit stomped my feet off to the bedroom.
Or I find out that in the middle of the night when the poor, poor ear doctor was shivering with cold he attempted to procure the tiniest scrap of covers and was met with my imposing white knuckled duvet death grip.
And then there's the time when, upon returning from a scary, middle of the night, low blood sugar-induced candy binge he is just getting comfortable again and thanking the gods above for not letting him die his usually kind and cheery wife begins to flop around like an irritated dying fish , thus immaturely communicating her displeasure with his slight coming-back-to-bed motion.
And please, let's not forget the times when he decides to stay up watching TV and I am in selfishly splayed across the dead center of the bed, denying him his requisite space in which to drift to slumberland.
And the crazy thing is that I never remember a single occurrence. Every time I'm told these things I'm wide eyed with shock and filled with disbelief. Because, really, all those sins committed by the same person? Really? It seems a bit far fetched, doesn't it?
So either I'm a raging circadian rhythm induced she-devil or the ear doctor has the most fantastic nocturnal imagination.
Tuesday, March 24, 2009
Not as great as the real thing....

Don't you think?
(seen on Bunnyshop)
Monday, March 23, 2009
Tell me what to do
The ear doctor and I have been AGONIZING over this. Well, actually, the ear doctor is very cool, collected and normal about this while I am o-b-s-e-s-s-i-n-g.
Should we continue our fully 401k contribution or save up every penny to try to buy a house this year.
On the one hand, shares have never been cheaper to pick up. In my (probably faulty) reasoning, if we get these babies cheap now they should be worth a lot in the future, right? Also, I always hear that every dollar contributed before the age of 30 is worth like 10 dollars contributed after 30 (or something like that).
On the other, Pres Obama is dangling a $8,000 dollar carrot out in front of my outstretched grubby little fingertips. I mean, how can I not at least TRY to buy a house when he's offering to throw that kind of cash into the pot?!?!?
How on earth is a normal person supposed to make this kind of decision?!?!?
Deep thoughts
Every time I make something we always critique it and suggest ways it could have been better. I know a lot of people might think this is harsh, but I love doing it. Part of me is a perfectionist and the other part is food critic. This is how yesterday's evaluation went:
Me: Well, that was pretty good.
Ear doctor: Yeah, it was awesome. I loved it.
Me: The only thing I think I'd do different is sub out the old, crusty french bread for something more substantial...like some buttery slices of brioche.
Ear doctor: (rolls his eyes) Brioche has got to be the most pretentious of all the breads.
Me: Really? You think so? What about Ciabatta?
Ear doctor: No way! Ciabatta is rustic Italian country bread...
Me: (interrupting) and Brichoe isn't an old French country bread?
Ear doctor: Well, Ciabatta is like New Money and Brioche is Old Money. Ciabatta just recently got all this fame and prestige and doesn't know how to wear it as well. It's all about flaunting it. It's not pretentious. Brioche belongs to an exclusive country club.
So now you know
Thursday, March 19, 2009
An Ode to Santa Magita
So, in order to properly honor her, I would like to dedicate this wonderful montage to her:
No one can rock a horizontal stripe intersected by a diagonal piece of lace like the Magster!
Maggie had to wear a bow in her hair like this because people always thought she was a boy with this haircut. Also, please note her awesome acid wash jeans. (my personal awkward period begins)
Yes, we are posing with a paper skeleton around our shoulders. Nothing to see here.
I spent about 3 hours doing her hair like this.

I bought her this dress for her birthday one year. I usually always get her clothes for her birthday/Christmas.

She was a very demure bride

We don't handle heat or exercise very well.

She's a great mom.
Wednesday, March 18, 2009
Free luncher
Sometimes I go to a meeting because they've catered it. The topic? Not exactly central to my job description. The speaker? A bit boring and pretentious. The food?Free? I'm in!
And I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one who is lured out of the semi-privacy of their personal cubical by the siren call of free Quiznos. How can I be sure of this? Well, after 5+ years of crack investigative observation I've begun to be able to spot the signs of the free-loader-luncher.
The most obvious sign is the inevitable post-carb-not-at-all-interested snooze that overtakes the offender about 20 minutes into the presentation. Sometimes I am just BLOWN away by another person's blatant mid-meeting naps. I look around and notice that someone has completely konked out and I am simultaneously shocked and impressed.
Shocked because, well, everyone can see you asleep buddy! Aren't you worried about your reputation? Don't you feel the tiniest bit of obligation to pay attention when you've just snarfed their free lunch offering?
However, it is a bit impressive that they are so sure of themselves that something like that doesn't even register on their embarrass-o-meter. I bet they wouldn't even blink if they found they'd had spinach in their teeth for an hour or their fly was down. What would it be like to be that laid back? I have no idea.
It really should go
I'd pick Thursday
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
fire up the hog
Anyway, this week I was pretty pumped because he hadn't been able to sneak one by me. That is, until I reached into my purse to get my wallet to pay. Turns out he slipped me a flyer for this beauty:

Well, he IS turning 30 this year, so the sky is the limit on presents, right? Oh, bonus, I can pay for it in 3 easy installments of $33!
I'm going to be the wife of the CENTURY!
Can my eyes smile too?
Monday, March 16, 2009
Bit by the gardening bug
She and her husband had a summer long water fight that escalated to the point where he was in the front yard squirting her with the hose and she was standing at the second story window dumping buckets on him. FUN people.
One crucial thing about her that you need to know is that she collects garbage.
Not all garbage, just organic stuff because she is P-A-S-S-I-O-N-A-T-E about compost. Whenever I visit the ear doctor's grandma she has a small plastic bag by the sink for any organic trash. When it fills up she twists it shut and gives it to Nancy.
So when I saw this little beauty on this awesome blog I thought of her:

It's a little under the counter compost machine!!!
Now, I know this little guy is probably too little for Nancy since she has a big beautiful garden in her backyard, but for me and my container gardening it would be SOOOOOO awesome! If anyone has $300 laying around and wants to get me this I would be EVER so appreciative.
Ummm, that was a little anticlimactic

Your totally lack of creativity was so disappointing that I had to abruptly turn off my TV, grab the book I'm in the middle of and make my way to my MUCH less glamorous tub for a soothing bath. I had to relax away my utter annoyance at your totally ball-drop.
Get it together for next year.
Sincerely, Katie
Thursday, March 12, 2009
Help!


Wednesday, March 11, 2009
Attempting to NOT be the most annoying person
When you attend a dinner party do you help do the dishes after?
Sometimes I do and sometimes I don't. I can't pin point the exact circumstance that tips me over the edge into feeling like it is OK to sit and keep my hands out of scalding water. Sometimes it just doesn't seem like the right thing to do, and other times it seems perfectly alright. Sometimes I can tell the hostess genuinely doesn't want my help.
It's really weird, because whenever anyone offers to help me clean up afterward I always love it. So using that logic, I should always be the first to jump up, grab a scrubbie and get to work. Because, I seriously don't mind dishes at all.
(Except for last night when I just couldn't bring myself to do anything besides sit my tired potato-sack-of-a-body down on the couch and watch Idol....BTW....I'm I the only person in America who finds this person so annoying they want to poke their eyeballs out every time they see him? )

So back to the question at hand, is it ALWAYS good manners to help someone clean up after a dinner party, or are the circumstances where its alright to let them sit?
Tuesday, March 10, 2009
Puffy Eyes
In my dream a line of puppies would climb up the ladder to an old, shiny steel slide, take a ride down and then break their leg. They'd go to the hospital, get a cast and immediately climb back up to the top of the slide for another grisly ride. They'd do it over and over and no matter what I did they wouldn't stop. Terrifying.
I don't usually have vivid dreams, so when I do they really stick with me. Which is why I am exhausted this morning.
Last night at 3:37 am I found myself awake in bed, sobbing out of control. As the tears streamed down my face I gasped for breath and tried to push away the frightening dream I'd just had.
I dreamt that my parents took me and the ear doctor to Disneyworld. We had a great trip, but they went back a day early. On the morning of our last day, our parent-free day, the concierge from one of the resorts we were walking by pulled me in and gave me a package. There were no identifying marks on the package, so I was a little excited.
When I opened the box everything went all wrong.
It was a letter from my mom saying that she was leaving my dad. They were separating and she gave a whole list of reasons why. It was horrible. The terror of my family breaking down the seam was so gut wrenching that my pillow was soaked before I even realized it was only a dream.
I'm so glad that I had someone I love so much laying next to me. Before I was married when this happened I found myself wandering around the house in the middle of the night trying to tell my brain to let it go, to find a happier path to dream down.
Monday, March 09, 2009
Friday, March 06, 2009
That grass is greener
As I type away, sitting in my ergonomically designed chair, breathing recycled, reconditioned air I pine for a fresh breeze to come my way.
As I pack up my things at the end of the day I realize that my body isn't stiff from hard work, but creaky from inactivity.
And when I get home my brain has been wheeling so fast all day that I feel exhausted. Not the good, man I just worked so physically hard that I'm dropping with fatigue. The bad, I can't even use my brain enough to figure out why my DVR didn't get this week's episode of House.
Right after I wrote this post I watched this talk and it BLEW MY MIND.
Thursday, March 05, 2009
Birthmom Buds Project
I don't know how you parents do it. There is so much to tell these little people about. So much they don't understand. What a HUGE responsibility you have on a daily basis!
After I stumbled through our little discussion we made thank you notes for the organizers of the Birthmom Buds program. Please note the tiny little purple-blanket-wrapped baby in the upper right-hand corner of the picture. It was REALLY adorable and I wish I'd got a better pic of it.
Then, we pulled out our needles and thread and sewed buttons on these bags that I'd already made. Lesson for everyone out there: if you are teaching 10 year olds to do anything with a tread and needle it is SO much easier to thread the needle and tie the knot in the end yourself. It's a bit beyond the capability of the average little girl.
Next up? fill all the bags with the donated goodies. The girls LOVED this part. I had them make a ton of piles of stuff all over the floor and they went from pile to pile adding things to their bags. Over and over I heard, "oh, this is fun like shopping" (girls after my own heart)
Last, but not least, I introduced these girls to the beauty of the Polaroid camera. And, they LOVED it. As soon as the film spit out the front of the camera they ran over to me and said, "shake it, shake it" At which point I broke out into a little Outkast. But I'm pretty sure only my friend and adult group helper Lashelda go my reference.
Due to the unruly chaos during the actual activity I didn't have a chance to take a picture with all of the items displayed. Please disregard the ugly crappy carpet and the matching color wall backdrop.
Usually we have 7 little girls show up to our activity and only 4 came last night. At first it really bummed me out that 3 of them didn't get a chance to participate in this activity. Now I realize that I'm grateful that the 4 that came had a great time and genuinely learned to love serving others.
Thank you so much to all of you who took the time to participate in our activity. It made all the difference in the world, to me personally and to these girls. When I told them that strangers had sent me all this stuff to fill the bags they were shocked.
But, really, you aren't strangers. At least not to me.
Wednesday, March 04, 2009
4th folder, 4th picture
