1. Pray. Since leaving Provo and having to decide who I really am and what I really want from my life I've realize that prayer has become a real discussion with someone I know instead of a lofty, detached, impersonal homage.
2. Lame BYU dances/activities/dates. Used to attend everyone and wonder if I was the only one who felt like they were weird. I haven't heard "Cotton Eyed Joe" or "Kiss from a Rose" or "Lady in Red" in two years and that is heaven.
3. Try to convert others. Nothing is as vain and shallow as being someone's friend just so that they'll espouse your same beliefs. Variety is what make life worth living.
4. Jugde others for showing skin. Seriously, what was I thinking. Who cares if someone is wearing a tank top and a mini skirt. They're cute. I cringe thinking about how mean I was to some people for wearing things I secretly wish I could wear.
5. Pepsi. Jeez, I love the stuff. Why didn't I ever partake during college. Stupid peer pressure.
6. Sarcasm. I used to be really critical/judgmental of everything and used hurtful words to make people feel bad. It just made others feel bad, me unhappy, and gave strangers a bad impression of my basic personality.
7. Sleepy Sundays. This usually involves at least a 3 hour nap every week. At school I always tried to use my Sundays to do churchy stuff. The 7th day is for REST people!
8. Feel Guilty. I used to spend so much time and consideration thinking about things I'd done wrong and how I needed to be a better person. Now I realize I'm doing a pretty good job, and it's alright to think that.
9. Opening my friendships. At BYU I always thought that I was cooler than some people. Now I realize that what really matters is to be nice to everyone. I'm lucky to be as confident and outgoing as I am, I shouldn't be so exclusive.
I had to make it 9 because I got bored before I got to number 10.
This post inspired by this really cool girl
Tuesday, December 07, 2004
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14 comments:
I used to be madly in love with a mormon girl. I was too much of a pagan for her. Her name was Lisa Curtis. We lived in Fresno, Ca.. Her dad was host of "The Uncle Bill Show" in the 60's. The show that ran "The Mickey Mouse Club". She would be 50 now. I'll bet she still looks good.
She was also a "White Skinned Goddes". My only regret is I never got to "nail" her.
Kev
I love this!! I appreciate you and Kaycee’s honesty with your present situation; it is extremely impressive and inspiring. Do I also need to do a top ten about my no mo men (i.e. no more Mormon)? Ahh… you two have done it so well I will leave it at this. Although I will add that the two I have enjoyed the most is the ridding my life of guilt and having Sundays to do whatever I want… especially Sunday brunch. Nicely done Katie.
You definitely were not the only one at BYU to think that BYU dances/activities/dates were weird. It's refreshing to be in a place where those no longer exist. Maybe I'm just too high-and-mighty, but I don't think it's fun to get asked out on a date and find out that I'm expected to pretend I have a british accent or sit in the middle of the world painting at the airport so that I can eat dinner "on top of the world." I'm with you on this one.
-Britt
I like these lists. They are pretty interesting. I'm extremely nosy and these lists are extremely revealing. I love it. I hope you don't mind that I don't know you, and I read it anyway. (I linked from Kaycee.)
Welcome to humanity ;)
Sarah, in response to your comment:
I agree with you about lame church activities, but your perspective on really how lame a church activity can get is different from mine. Compared to what went on at BYU, the CU ward activites are freaking AWESOME! Even that weird Halloween thing was cool. I love that you are so proud of your modest swimsuit. If I looked as good as you do I would be seriously tempted to wear nothing but string bikinis all summer long. As it is, that's not much of a temptation. I know I should get "off the sauce" (Pepsi) but it's my one little vice. We all need something to keep us from being translated and that's mine. Church things on Sunday are great, but at BYU you can go from one church thing to the next with no break to recharge and really contemplate why Sunday should be special. I found myself caught up in the social aspect and not so much in the personal stuff. About feeling guilty....either extreme is really bad. I know you think what you experienced was worse (being numb to the qguilt) but I'm here to tell you that constantly worrying about how you fall short and not understanding the fact that we ALL fall short and that's ok is equally dangerous. That's why Utah has the highest number of people on prozac.
Just wanted to let you know that I'm the extremely nosy person who accidentally posted anonymously up there. Don't be confused, there are 2 Kacys. (Kaycee and Kacy. I'm Kacy).
Katie, I have to say I agree with Sarah on this one. Don't deny your inner Molly.
Yeah, Utah Valley culture is so freaking weird. But don't confuse that a bit with Mormon culture. It's completely different. Tonight I am going to Enrichment. Not my fave thing to do, particularly since Heath will be home tonight. But I just feel so much better when I do the little (sometimes dorky) things that make up being a Mormon.
Seriously, you remember me in college. One of my nicknames was Midriff, because you all saw it so often. Well, I know it is amazing, but I like dressing modestly now. And I even like garments, which at first I *hated.* It's the gradual change of heart, and it's really cool to experience.
And I think it's hilarious that you are a Pepsi addict. My mom was a Dr Pepper addict for a while. Worse than you, it sounds like, because she drank a six pack a day. That's when she realized it was a little extreme. Ha ha
The greatest beauty of the Mormon religion, be you practicing Mormon or Molly Mormon, is the importance of family. No matter your differences, no matter your opinions, status in life family etc. family remains constant as the most important thing. If I had a top ten list of things I enjoy about no longer being Mormon I would include that my family still is and that I am grateful they are, and I am grateful they love me no matter what.
BTW... we Utah Countie peeps are okay. Wacky people are everywhere and in every religion.
I meant "be you practicing Mormon or Jack Mormon", not Molly Mormon... oops.
Thought I'd jump on the bandwagon and comment along with the 14 other commenters.
Katie, loved this post. It is REALLY tough to say if you disagree with any religious aspects of your religion, and in particular with people you know/other LDS reading your blog. I'm not exactly familiar with LDS, but it is a huge relief to know you are so darn NORMAL. It makes me like you more! I've grown up Southern Baptist, and have had similar experiences: constant evangalizing to others, being close minded, not showing skin, Judging others (my BIGGEST pet peeve), guilt inducement. It took me a long time to develop my own personality as a Christian.
As I told Kaycee, it's between me & God. He's the only one who can judge, and it's up to me to live my life to the fullest and be a good example as much as possible.
Maybe I'll do a post one day soon about it, I can't think of all the words to say what I did.
I'm proud of you for sticking to your beliefs and feelings. Don't know who Molly is, but maybe it's a good thing you're denying your inner her.
:)
gff, you're so cool. Being a "molly mormon" means that you are really good, never make a mistake and strictly adhear to all the guidelines of Mormonism. Truth be told, I am pretty molly.
I know that I'm a self-interested jerk, and I'm sure my comment isn't welcome here, but I think this is a very interesting discussion. I especially like how everyone is straight-forward with their views, even though they seem to all contradict eachother. Here's what I think of it, if anyone cares.
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