Since I have been back from Oregon I have slept in you twice. Neither night has been restful. You have done your very best to preclude me from entering your soft refuge of shedded feathers of fowl and I'm left questioning why?
Have I done something to offend you?
Are you taking out your anger in a passive-aggressive (non)statement?
It seems that way to me.
Every night I fall asleep on my back with my hands folded serenely over my torso. Every night, that is, until I got back from my trip. Now when I flop in bed I am immediately impelled to turn over onto my stomach. I never sleep on my stomach. I don't like sleeping on my stomach.
Anyway, I think your behavior is childish.
If you have a problem with me you have to tell me.
I'm not a mind reader here.
I hate to throw around ultimatums, but if you don't allow me into your cool cocoon of comfort tonight I'm going to target to get new sheets.
Don't tempt me because I will do it.