Wednesday, April 13, 2005

Last night

I had a bad dream.

The kind of bad dream that makes you want to curl up in a ball as tightly as you can, pull the blanket over your head and wait for it to be over. You want your mom to come and rub your back, to tell you that everything is going to be alright.

Not a nightmare. Nightmares are bad, but they go away.

I'm talking about the kind of hauntingly bad dream that stays with you, lurking around every corner all day long, hiding until you've let your guard down and someone or something reminds you of the dream which suddenly becomes all that more real and vivid.

I dreamed that the ear doctor broke up with me and started dating my cousin Hilary. It was very dark and scary for me. I kept questioning him for why he dumped me and he just kept saying over and over, "I don't love you" and "I never liked you"

I got up in the middle of the night to try to shake it.

I drank a whole glass of water.

I went back to bed and it resumed. I ended up actually physically crying in my sheets.

It was horrible.

8 comments:

webbkid said...

Katie.
Sorry this isn't about your post but rather defending myself after you layed the smack down.

Holy crud give me a break. Okay first of all this has been my first year ever in Utah. If you are talking about living in the Utah frame of mind than I've never lived there. That was a juvenile accusation if you ask me.
Anyway my point was not that a woman who believes in equality is a feminazi. Even BRIAN of all people believes in equality. However, I do not believe that Orbit's post merited such critisism. Orbit said, "Most of the wisdom we recieve in this life come from the women." Should I be offended that he was being sexist there? How come sexist only goes one way? That was a fair post. The apostles and first presiency are all prophets seers and revelators as you well know. They speak with authority from God. So give us a break if it is easier to pay attention to the male speakers at General Conference.

the ear doctor said...

2 things:

1) I love you babe! I know it's hard to get rid of the feelings that dreams like that elicit (I cite the dream I had a couple of weeks ago - I wish you'd stop making out with those other guys). In response to those feelings, here it is in front of the whole internet ... I love you and have liked you since our 1st date - but you already knew that. You're the best! I'm happy to call you my girlfriend. No breakups here! That might not be as good as mom rubbing your back, but I hope it helps.

2) "Elder Orbit" and his little disciple above me here are MORONS. I read their stuff last night and was thoroughly disappointed in their understanding of gospel principles, the time the Elder wasted/wastes by writing a friggin' blog, and by their spelling. Elder Orbit doesn't only deserve criticism about that one post, but about all of them. "Kick in the 'junk,'" or not, I say. along with the prophet and his dad, "forget yourself [and your blog] and go to work." As for "webbkid", I don't mean to be bossy, but you'd do better to choose another role model for your mission experience, son.

brittany said...

yay, ED! i'm liking him more and more every day. you've found a winner, katie!

the ear doctor said...

Thanks for the shout out Brittany - I'll see you in MOAB!

Elle said...

Aww, ED, you are SO sweet! Yall are lucky to have each other!!

Anonymous said...

Just and impartial observer, but webkid...you look like a tool.

webbkid said...

Impartial observer, I'm inclined to agree, but I think we disagree on who's "using" me.

Maggie said...

What is the webbkid talking about? Sorry to be so out of the loop, but I haven't really gotten on my computer for a couple of days.