To "the narrator" at project mayhem:
Why do you stay in Utah valley when you seem to be so bothered by the other people there? Do you like being there just because you can feel different?
To jl at celibate in the city:
Do you ever think about just not writing in your blog anymore? I don't say this as a suggestion or anything, just wondering if you've ever experienced the same feelings of staleness that I'm having right now. How did you get over it?
To Anth at Random Junk:
Why don't you post more? You're a really great writer. If all you ever did was give reviews of the books you're reading it would be AWESOME! Plus, when are you going to get a real blog that I CAN MAKE COMMENTS TO?!?!?!
To the MAGSTER at miss margaret's art class:
When are you going to call me so we can chat about everything that you're going through right now?
To Jill at egg in spoon:
How did you become such a good writer? Do you read a lot? What's your favorite book? How's your puppy doing?
To Kacee at misery loves fun-pany:
Are you the person who posted about that cool wedding shower game that you played that was like the newly-wed game? I want to do that for my friend's shower I'm throwing next month and need ideas.
To GFF:
Will your husband ever have a set schedule so you guys can come home and be together every night? It makes me sad for you when I hear he has to be away 4 days in a row.
To Britt at pink poodle prints:
Did you get your thesis written? Are you going to be done before you head off to North Carolina?
To Rebecca at throught the looking glass:
Are you ever going to post again?
To Bryan:
Please don't forget to have your brother put together some climbing gear for our trip to Moab.
To "elle" at blonde beautiful brilliant bombshell:
Do you think you're going to be in engineering for the length of your whole career?
To Dan at the howlingman:
Did you know you are the most intriguing person to me on the sidebar?
To Sarah Marinara:
When are you going to compile your work and get someone to publish it? What are you waiting around for?
Tuesday, April 19, 2005
Thursday, April 14, 2005
My friend's fun survey
In my family we have this game. You go around and try to stump each other with advertising jingles. One person sings the song, the other person has to guess the product.
Anyway, my friend Spencer is doing a survey and needs your help. It only takes 10 minutes, and it is really fun, so go over there and give him a bigger statistical sampling group.
Spencer's Survey
Anyway, my friend Spencer is doing a survey and needs your help. It only takes 10 minutes, and it is really fun, so go over there and give him a bigger statistical sampling group.
Spencer's Survey
Wednesday, April 13, 2005
Last night
I had a bad dream.
The kind of bad dream that makes you want to curl up in a ball as tightly as you can, pull the blanket over your head and wait for it to be over. You want your mom to come and rub your back, to tell you that everything is going to be alright.
Not a nightmare. Nightmares are bad, but they go away.
I'm talking about the kind of hauntingly bad dream that stays with you, lurking around every corner all day long, hiding until you've let your guard down and someone or something reminds you of the dream which suddenly becomes all that more real and vivid.
I dreamed that the ear doctor broke up with me and started dating my cousin Hilary. It was very dark and scary for me. I kept questioning him for why he dumped me and he just kept saying over and over, "I don't love you" and "I never liked you"
I got up in the middle of the night to try to shake it.
I drank a whole glass of water.
I went back to bed and it resumed. I ended up actually physically crying in my sheets.
It was horrible.
The kind of bad dream that makes you want to curl up in a ball as tightly as you can, pull the blanket over your head and wait for it to be over. You want your mom to come and rub your back, to tell you that everything is going to be alright.
Not a nightmare. Nightmares are bad, but they go away.
I'm talking about the kind of hauntingly bad dream that stays with you, lurking around every corner all day long, hiding until you've let your guard down and someone or something reminds you of the dream which suddenly becomes all that more real and vivid.
I dreamed that the ear doctor broke up with me and started dating my cousin Hilary. It was very dark and scary for me. I kept questioning him for why he dumped me and he just kept saying over and over, "I don't love you" and "I never liked you"
I got up in the middle of the night to try to shake it.
I drank a whole glass of water.
I went back to bed and it resumed. I ended up actually physically crying in my sheets.
It was horrible.
Really disturbing commercial
So last night I saw a commercial that freaked me out.
This couple is out in the middle of the lake in a boat when they get a hole in the bottom. As water rushes in the guy starts to freak out because he needs to stop it or it will ruin the date. He is frantically looking everywhere for something to stop up the hole.
Amidst his frantic searching the girl reaches into her bag and pulls one of her trusty Tampax pearl tampons from an industrial sized box, uses the applicator, and stops up the hole.
They then were able to continue their romantic date.
A few things in this 30 second spot disturbed me.
1. Why the heck did she have an entire box with her on their romantic boat ride? Honestly, what did she think, she was going to have a chance to right there in the boat use one? Nast.
2. The shot they showed of the tampon expanding because of the water just made my skin crawl.
3. Does their really need to be other uses for a tampon. I'm pretty sure the one their designed for is enough. Now I have to carry some around just in case I am involved in a nautical mishap? Maybe my grandpa should buy a box and keep them on the boat just in case. I can just see it now....My grandpa sitting around with a bunch of his buddies fishing when they spring a leak. All the other old men start freaking out, but not my grandpa because he was prepared. Yeah, right.
4. Why didn't they just row the boat to shore? I mean seriously, the whole rest of the date they are either going to spend a) bailing out water or b) sitting with their feet going pruny. Either way the date is pretty much ruined and does not necessitate using the tampon.
That commercial was just weird and makes me wonder how these ads get on the air. Isn't there some kind of checks and balances that each ad has to go through? A succession of sign-off? You can't tell me that THAT add got past more that one person. Somewhere someone must have heard the premise and said, "fixing a canoe? I don't get it?"
This couple is out in the middle of the lake in a boat when they get a hole in the bottom. As water rushes in the guy starts to freak out because he needs to stop it or it will ruin the date. He is frantically looking everywhere for something to stop up the hole.
Amidst his frantic searching the girl reaches into her bag and pulls one of her trusty Tampax pearl tampons from an industrial sized box, uses the applicator, and stops up the hole.
They then were able to continue their romantic date.
A few things in this 30 second spot disturbed me.
1. Why the heck did she have an entire box with her on their romantic boat ride? Honestly, what did she think, she was going to have a chance to right there in the boat use one? Nast.
2. The shot they showed of the tampon expanding because of the water just made my skin crawl.
3. Does their really need to be other uses for a tampon. I'm pretty sure the one their designed for is enough. Now I have to carry some around just in case I am involved in a nautical mishap? Maybe my grandpa should buy a box and keep them on the boat just in case. I can just see it now....My grandpa sitting around with a bunch of his buddies fishing when they spring a leak. All the other old men start freaking out, but not my grandpa because he was prepared. Yeah, right.
4. Why didn't they just row the boat to shore? I mean seriously, the whole rest of the date they are either going to spend a) bailing out water or b) sitting with their feet going pruny. Either way the date is pretty much ruined and does not necessitate using the tampon.
That commercial was just weird and makes me wonder how these ads get on the air. Isn't there some kind of checks and balances that each ad has to go through? A succession of sign-off? You can't tell me that THAT add got past more that one person. Somewhere someone must have heard the premise and said, "fixing a canoe? I don't get it?"
Tuesday, April 12, 2005
Blogging about TV
So I kind of think this is retarded to post about, but I'm going to.
Last night I watched my first episode of Super Nanny and I really liked it.
The premise of the show is that there are parents out there who just don't have a clue of what they are doing. I'm sure you've seen the type...they're always yelling at their kids in public, or buying them ridiculously expensive presents all the time. Well, this "super nanny" comes in, observes the family for a while, helps them try to learn out to be better parents and leaves having bettered their lives.
It sounded dumb to me when I heard about it.
I gave it a chance last night and was pleasantly surprised.
I felt so bad for these people because they just didn't have any idea at all how to help their kids. The mom was at her wits end and frazzeled and I just felt so bad for them. The mom even admitted that she felt like a bad mom and she loved her kids so much and just wanted to do the right thing, but she didn't know what else to do. It took them 2 hours to put the 2 year old to bed every night!
Anyway, super nanny came in and really helped them out.
Normally I don't really like reality TV that much, but this just seemed so real and honest that I was touched.
Last night I watched my first episode of Super Nanny and I really liked it.
The premise of the show is that there are parents out there who just don't have a clue of what they are doing. I'm sure you've seen the type...they're always yelling at their kids in public, or buying them ridiculously expensive presents all the time. Well, this "super nanny" comes in, observes the family for a while, helps them try to learn out to be better parents and leaves having bettered their lives.
It sounded dumb to me when I heard about it.
I gave it a chance last night and was pleasantly surprised.
I felt so bad for these people because they just didn't have any idea at all how to help their kids. The mom was at her wits end and frazzeled and I just felt so bad for them. The mom even admitted that she felt like a bad mom and she loved her kids so much and just wanted to do the right thing, but she didn't know what else to do. It took them 2 hours to put the 2 year old to bed every night!
Anyway, super nanny came in and really helped them out.
Normally I don't really like reality TV that much, but this just seemed so real and honest that I was touched.
Monday, April 11, 2005
Happy Birthday Bryan
Brittany had a wonderful idea.
I'd also like to send out a creative and heartfelt birthday wish to my pal Bryan.
I can't even remember my first impression of Bryan, but I bet it was filled with Dualism. I probably was instantly drawn to someone with so much confidence, yet repelled because that independence almost overshadowed my own.
The strange thing is that I have hardly any memories of doing school things with Bryan. We went through the same classes, had the same homework and study friends and yet my recollection of those times have him strangely absent.
Bryan is the person who makes me think. He challenges what I hold to be plain truth and makes me really understand what I believe. He makes you commit to what you think.
When I think of Bryan my mind immediately jumps from fond memory to fond memory. First, and I don't know why, but I think of that smile. That "I can conquer the world if I want to" smile. That "I bet I can at least get the number of any girl I want" smile. That "Wall street is mine for the taking" smile.
The second oldest memory I have of him is Fall Fling my senior year. He just walked up to me and we started dancing...With my boyfriend (Derek) standing right there. It was weird, but seemed so normal and innocent.
Third, I think of is the Havasu trip last year. The arrangement was that I was going to fly in to Vegas, he was going to rent a car in LA, drive over and pick me up from the airport. When I landed I called him and found out that he'd just left LA. I sat on that bench and waited for him to come get me. He pulled up in the "mid life crisis" (convertible Seabring) and we drove the whole way to Havasu with the wind rushing through our hair.
Also during that trip Bryan tried to tell me how to make hamburgers and I almost went ballistic.
Bryan reminds me of being strong, independent, verbose and funny. He reminds me of strange dates and even stranger propositions. He reminds me of the indomitable spirit of man. He reminds me of me. He reminds me of college. He reminds me of laughing and loving and missing the people I hold so dear.
Happy birthday pal.
I'd also like to send out a creative and heartfelt birthday wish to my pal Bryan.
I can't even remember my first impression of Bryan, but I bet it was filled with Dualism. I probably was instantly drawn to someone with so much confidence, yet repelled because that independence almost overshadowed my own.
The strange thing is that I have hardly any memories of doing school things with Bryan. We went through the same classes, had the same homework and study friends and yet my recollection of those times have him strangely absent.
Bryan is the person who makes me think. He challenges what I hold to be plain truth and makes me really understand what I believe. He makes you commit to what you think.
When I think of Bryan my mind immediately jumps from fond memory to fond memory. First, and I don't know why, but I think of that smile. That "I can conquer the world if I want to" smile. That "I bet I can at least get the number of any girl I want" smile. That "Wall street is mine for the taking" smile.
The second oldest memory I have of him is Fall Fling my senior year. He just walked up to me and we started dancing...With my boyfriend (Derek) standing right there. It was weird, but seemed so normal and innocent.
Third, I think of is the Havasu trip last year. The arrangement was that I was going to fly in to Vegas, he was going to rent a car in LA, drive over and pick me up from the airport. When I landed I called him and found out that he'd just left LA. I sat on that bench and waited for him to come get me. He pulled up in the "mid life crisis" (convertible Seabring) and we drove the whole way to Havasu with the wind rushing through our hair.
Also during that trip Bryan tried to tell me how to make hamburgers and I almost went ballistic.
Bryan reminds me of being strong, independent, verbose and funny. He reminds me of strange dates and even stranger propositions. He reminds me of the indomitable spirit of man. He reminds me of me. He reminds me of college. He reminds me of laughing and loving and missing the people I hold so dear.
Happy birthday pal.
Saving Money
When you want to go on a vacation what is the number one thing that will dissuade you from going?
Money, right?
You never can seem to scrape together enough cash to leave home. Well, time is probably a close second, but whatever.
You want to take a great trip to somewhere you've never been far, far away but you just can't bring yourself to be widely irresponsible, throw caution to the wind, whip out your credit card and go.
What is the alternative?
Two words:
ROAD TRIP
The thing about the road trip is that you probably aren't going anywhere TOO far away and you are probably seeing things you've already seen.
This weekend I took the 8 hour road trip to Provo with the ear doctor.
Yep, the place I lived for 4 years.
I know every backroad and sidestreet in the area. I know the best way to get from campus in Provo to my aunt's house in Orem factoring in time of day, weather, sporting events and my personal fatigue.
I went over for my little sister's bridal shower (which went very well Heather) so I didn't really want to buy a plane ticket to get there.
What a fool I am.
Not only did we have to buy gas at these freakishly high prices, but also I got a $125 speeding ticket (curse you Colorado highway patrol), on the way back we slid off the black-ice covered freeway and had to be towed 6 feet back onto the road (to the tune of $260), and we had ended up staying the night at the Silverthorne Motel 8 (another $60), and having dinner there too!
Total spent this weekend on transportation ALONE: $575
Total cost for two round trip tickets from Denver to Salt Lake City on Frontier Airlines: $410
Any questions?
Money, right?
You never can seem to scrape together enough cash to leave home. Well, time is probably a close second, but whatever.
You want to take a great trip to somewhere you've never been far, far away but you just can't bring yourself to be widely irresponsible, throw caution to the wind, whip out your credit card and go.
What is the alternative?
Two words:
ROAD TRIP
The thing about the road trip is that you probably aren't going anywhere TOO far away and you are probably seeing things you've already seen.
This weekend I took the 8 hour road trip to Provo with the ear doctor.
Yep, the place I lived for 4 years.
I know every backroad and sidestreet in the area. I know the best way to get from campus in Provo to my aunt's house in Orem factoring in time of day, weather, sporting events and my personal fatigue.
I went over for my little sister's bridal shower (which went very well Heather) so I didn't really want to buy a plane ticket to get there.
What a fool I am.
Not only did we have to buy gas at these freakishly high prices, but also I got a $125 speeding ticket (curse you Colorado highway patrol), on the way back we slid off the black-ice covered freeway and had to be towed 6 feet back onto the road (to the tune of $260), and we had ended up staying the night at the Silverthorne Motel 8 (another $60), and having dinner there too!
Total spent this weekend on transportation ALONE: $575
Total cost for two round trip tickets from Denver to Salt Lake City on Frontier Airlines: $410
Any questions?
Thursday, April 07, 2005
Well everyone
I'm off to Utah for the weekend! It should be awesome because tomorrow afternoon I'm skiing with my Aunt, Saturday morning is Maggie's bridal shower, and Saturday night we're going to either a bluegrass fiddle festival or swing dancing with the ear doctor and all his friends.
BTW I'm introducing the ear doctor to my mom for the first time this weekend. I'm sure it will go really well, but stay tuned for my synopsis.
BTW I'm introducing the ear doctor to my mom for the first time this weekend. I'm sure it will go really well, but stay tuned for my synopsis.
I don't know how I did it...
but everyone at work has started to think that I run the show around here. Seriously, at least once a day someone makes a comment about how I have our entire program wrapped around my little finger.
I think it is the combination of knowing what I'm talking about, helping people out when the are in a jam, being a girl, and being shockingly sassy that wins people over.
For example: Today my boss's boss came in and fixed my heating vents because I was complaining about my office being too hot. Then, he said that I should have a promotion and helped me understand how to go about getting one.
Maybe I just have it really perfect here at my job or something. Whatever the case, things are just all coming together for me really well.
I think it is the combination of knowing what I'm talking about, helping people out when the are in a jam, being a girl, and being shockingly sassy that wins people over.
For example: Today my boss's boss came in and fixed my heating vents because I was complaining about my office being too hot. Then, he said that I should have a promotion and helped me understand how to go about getting one.
Maybe I just have it really perfect here at my job or something. Whatever the case, things are just all coming together for me really well.
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
Hello, we ALL have to share this space
So since when has it been alright to talk to me in the elevator?
Just because I am standing there, breathing, occupying the same closet size space as you does not mean that I want to strike up an inane conversation with you. Especially about work. Especially since you do not directly work with me and hence have no interesting thing to say to me which could in some way benefit or even interest me. Especially since you are wearing a t-shirt with a dragon on it, black tapered legged jeans, and a pair of tennis shoes with velcro.
Just because I am standing there, breathing, occupying the same closet size space as you does not mean that I want to strike up an inane conversation with you. Especially about work. Especially since you do not directly work with me and hence have no interesting thing to say to me which could in some way benefit or even interest me. Especially since you are wearing a t-shirt with a dragon on it, black tapered legged jeans, and a pair of tennis shoes with velcro.
Posting under the influence
So I think that this new blog template is messing with my mind.
Whenever I open it up I see how nice and sweet it looks and it makes it difficult to say anything depressing, or even sarcastically funny.
I look at those freakin pink petals and any firey, sassy, sullen streak in me is muted, dulled, irradicated, and snuffed out.
I think it is making my blog bland and not much fun to read.
I'll try to do better and keep it more real.
Whenever I open it up I see how nice and sweet it looks and it makes it difficult to say anything depressing, or even sarcastically funny.
I look at those freakin pink petals and any firey, sassy, sullen streak in me is muted, dulled, irradicated, and snuffed out.
I think it is making my blog bland and not much fun to read.
I'll try to do better and keep it more real.
Things everyone should do at least once in their life...
and I did all last night.
1. Talk for a long time to someone you thought you wouldn't like at all, but given a chance proves to be fascinating and intriguing.
2. See your significant other drive up, drop everything in your arms, run out to him, jump up into his arms, kiss and spin around in circles.
3. Display excessive amounts of public affection at the grocery store.
4. Talk through a movie because you'd rather talk to the people in the room with you than do anything else.
5. Live with your best friend and end up still being best friends when you move out. (I'm assuming this....I haven't moved out yet)
6. Eat authentic guacamole and chicken enchiladas prepared by someone who has spent more than 2 years living in central Mexico.
7. Realize that your life is pretty much the way you want it. You haven't made any big mistakes and the choices that you are making will all work out in the end.
1. Talk for a long time to someone you thought you wouldn't like at all, but given a chance proves to be fascinating and intriguing.
2. See your significant other drive up, drop everything in your arms, run out to him, jump up into his arms, kiss and spin around in circles.
3. Display excessive amounts of public affection at the grocery store.
4. Talk through a movie because you'd rather talk to the people in the room with you than do anything else.
5. Live with your best friend and end up still being best friends when you move out. (I'm assuming this....I haven't moved out yet)
6. Eat authentic guacamole and chicken enchiladas prepared by someone who has spent more than 2 years living in central Mexico.
7. Realize that your life is pretty much the way you want it. You haven't made any big mistakes and the choices that you are making will all work out in the end.
Tuesday, April 05, 2005
Its surprising they're still together after that beginning
Or
The Story of Father's Proposal
I'm sure over the years this story has become inflated in some areas and downplayed in others, but this is the version that sticks in my mind. Since you can't really ever get at true reality, this interpretation will have to do.
My mother was a strong, independent woman in her upper 20s who had a career and some strange roommates.
My dad was a funny salesman who had decided that law school wasn't really for him.
They both went to the same strange church congregation that they lovingly called, "the cuckoos nest" because there were so many nuts in the group.
Anyway, they'd been dating for quite a while.
One night as they were sitting in the car he tossed a little box into her lap and said, "well, what do you think?"
She opened it up and it was one diamond earring.
Confused she looked at it and back up at him in bewilderment.
It finally dawned on her that this was a marriage proposal.
She later found out that it was the earring of a "lady of questionable reputation" that my dad knew (he was a lot more sketchy back then) and had been purchased at a pawn shop (I think?).
She took 3 months in giving him an affirmative answer to his "eloquent" request.
To this day he insists that the earring was a "jewler's setting" and she maintains that it was only a "few weeks" before she gave him an answer.
Classic, huh?
The Story of Father's Proposal
I'm sure over the years this story has become inflated in some areas and downplayed in others, but this is the version that sticks in my mind. Since you can't really ever get at true reality, this interpretation will have to do.
My mother was a strong, independent woman in her upper 20s who had a career and some strange roommates.
My dad was a funny salesman who had decided that law school wasn't really for him.
They both went to the same strange church congregation that they lovingly called, "the cuckoos nest" because there were so many nuts in the group.
Anyway, they'd been dating for quite a while.
One night as they were sitting in the car he tossed a little box into her lap and said, "well, what do you think?"
She opened it up and it was one diamond earring.
Confused she looked at it and back up at him in bewilderment.
It finally dawned on her that this was a marriage proposal.
She later found out that it was the earring of a "lady of questionable reputation" that my dad knew (he was a lot more sketchy back then) and had been purchased at a pawn shop (I think?).
She took 3 months in giving him an affirmative answer to his "eloquent" request.
To this day he insists that the earring was a "jewler's setting" and she maintains that it was only a "few weeks" before she gave him an answer.
Classic, huh?
A kernel of annoyance
Last night I watched the NCAA championship game. It was pretty good and came down to the wire, which is my favorite way for any game to go.
The only thing that annoyed me was the table that the announcer people sat at.
Across the side facing the court there were big numbers:
Two things about this really bothered me. Bothered me to distraction and drew my attention from the game.
First, the numbers read in descending order from left to right. For some reason this really bugged me because here in North America we hold the norm for numbers to read from left to right in ascending order. How hard would it have been to print them the correct direction and avoid the headache?
Second, 65? Why 65? Did they intentionally mess up the sequence to mess with my mind? Don't most people look at numbers around them and try to make patters, see order, develop a sequence for the chaos in life? Don't they know that one small ripple the pond of my consciousness will disturb everything else?
Why didn't' they just put 64 and avoid all this consternation?!?!?!
The only thing that annoyed me was the table that the announcer people sat at.
Across the side facing the court there were big numbers:
Two things about this really bothered me. Bothered me to distraction and drew my attention from the game.
First, the numbers read in descending order from left to right. For some reason this really bugged me because here in North America we hold the norm for numbers to read from left to right in ascending order. How hard would it have been to print them the correct direction and avoid the headache?
Second, 65? Why 65? Did they intentionally mess up the sequence to mess with my mind? Don't most people look at numbers around them and try to make patters, see order, develop a sequence for the chaos in life? Don't they know that one small ripple the pond of my consciousness will disturb everything else?
Why didn't' they just put 64 and avoid all this consternation?!?!?!
Monday, April 04, 2005
Getting the brush off
Why do I let him get to me? It makes no sense.
It doesn't matter how much time or space I put between us he can totally wreck my mood with one inconsiderate action. I could go for months and months without my thoughts wandering to him, but inevitably he'll spring into my mind while someone is speaking or saying something that he really should hear.
I don't want him there, and yet, he is.
Why won't my strong will carry over into this and allow me to totally eradicate him from my psyche?
He calls me when he is at his lowest, most vulnerable point because he knows I'll be there. And I'm proud to be the type of friend that everyone knows will be there when they need it.
Only.
With him it feels like I'm being taken advantage of.
And I hate that.
I'm torn between my compassionate side and my independent side.
That's really what I hate.
Either course of action makes me feel like I am betraying myself.
It doesn't matter how much time or space I put between us he can totally wreck my mood with one inconsiderate action. I could go for months and months without my thoughts wandering to him, but inevitably he'll spring into my mind while someone is speaking or saying something that he really should hear.
I don't want him there, and yet, he is.
Why won't my strong will carry over into this and allow me to totally eradicate him from my psyche?
He calls me when he is at his lowest, most vulnerable point because he knows I'll be there. And I'm proud to be the type of friend that everyone knows will be there when they need it.
Only.
With him it feels like I'm being taken advantage of.
And I hate that.
I'm torn between my compassionate side and my independent side.
That's really what I hate.
Either course of action makes me feel like I am betraying myself.
Friday, April 01, 2005
Too Cliche?
In past relationships I've always had certain songs that remind me of my significant other.
"Near You Always" by Jewel and "Volare" by the Gypsy Kings will always conjure up happy memories of Derek and his ghetto little blue house in Provo.
"The Way you Move" by Outkast and "I love you" by Nat Cole make me think of falling in love with Eric in Mexico.
I've always had these songs that make me think of them, but I've never actually had a song that was "our song."
It always seems so cheesy and lame to have some ultra-romantic song that embodies your relationship.
Well, the ear doctor and I have officially decided to have a song, and I'm thrilled about it. It's a new song, so neither of us has any other memories attached to it. Also, it seems to be written exactly for us.
The song is...
wait for it...
Better Together by Jack Johnson.
It's the first track on his new In Between Dreams CD.
Anyway, my question is this:
Have you ever had an official "song" with a significant other? What was it? How did you decide it?
"Near You Always" by Jewel and "Volare" by the Gypsy Kings will always conjure up happy memories of Derek and his ghetto little blue house in Provo.
"The Way you Move" by Outkast and "I love you" by Nat Cole make me think of falling in love with Eric in Mexico.
I've always had these songs that make me think of them, but I've never actually had a song that was "our song."
It always seems so cheesy and lame to have some ultra-romantic song that embodies your relationship.
Well, the ear doctor and I have officially decided to have a song, and I'm thrilled about it. It's a new song, so neither of us has any other memories attached to it. Also, it seems to be written exactly for us.
The song is...
wait for it...
Better Together by Jack Johnson.
It's the first track on his new In Between Dreams CD.
Anyway, my question is this:
Have you ever had an official "song" with a significant other? What was it? How did you decide it?
Yea! It's spring!
That old design was WAY too intense for how happy I am and how beautiful it is outside.
I know my commets blow. I'm sorry if you've been frustrated by them.
I know my commets blow. I'm sorry if you've been frustrated by them.
Tuesday, March 29, 2005
My plant doesn't need me
When I started the program I am currently working on my officemate Shane bought me a office warming present.
A plant.
One of those plants that you get at the grocery store that is wrapped in silver and green cellophane with a big silver bow.
I love my little plant. She is pretty and tough and has survived everything from freezing winter winds (Shane left the window open one night) to life without water (I went on a trip and forgot to ask someone to water her) to drops from great heights (my mountain of reference books habitually knock her off the back of my desk). I used to love her independence and really looked to her as the embodiment of my own personality.
But.
I've been sick for 4 days and didn't come in to see her. No one was here to say hello to her in the morning. She didn't get water, natural light or her soil massage. Still she looks great. Better than ever.
It kind of makes me sad that she doesn't need me.
It makes me wonder if this is sometimes how I make/have made my boyfriends (past and present) feel.
I am independent and strong and don't really *need* anyone. I have my own goals and plans.
I'm sure it is attractive at first, but isn't a basic part of every relationship based (slightly at least) on needing the other person? Does my strong will turn people away and make them feel like their presence is ancillary to my existence when that really isn't how I feel.
Even though my plant is strong, if she goes forever without water she will shrivel up and die...even if she doesn't ever give that impression.
A plant.
One of those plants that you get at the grocery store that is wrapped in silver and green cellophane with a big silver bow.
I love my little plant. She is pretty and tough and has survived everything from freezing winter winds (Shane left the window open one night) to life without water (I went on a trip and forgot to ask someone to water her) to drops from great heights (my mountain of reference books habitually knock her off the back of my desk). I used to love her independence and really looked to her as the embodiment of my own personality.
But.
I've been sick for 4 days and didn't come in to see her. No one was here to say hello to her in the morning. She didn't get water, natural light or her soil massage. Still she looks great. Better than ever.
It kind of makes me sad that she doesn't need me.
It makes me wonder if this is sometimes how I make/have made my boyfriends (past and present) feel.
I am independent and strong and don't really *need* anyone. I have my own goals and plans.
I'm sure it is attractive at first, but isn't a basic part of every relationship based (slightly at least) on needing the other person? Does my strong will turn people away and make them feel like their presence is ancillary to my existence when that really isn't how I feel.
Even though my plant is strong, if she goes forever without water she will shrivel up and die...even if she doesn't ever give that impression.
Friday, March 25, 2005
The miracle of eBay
My friend Derek *** (last name replaced with *** to keep his identity from circling the globe further still) went down to Costa Rica last week and got mugged. It sucked because he had to cancel his credit cards and get a new drivers license. I felt bad for him.
My friend Bryan decided to be funny and "sell his soul" on eBay. This was the email Bryan sent this morning:
So, I had my soul up for auction on eBay (It attracted some pretty high bids). The guy who bought it was from somewhere in South America. I was all ready to pack it up and ship it off to him, and then I noticed that his name was Derek ***. I thought "That's funny. I know Derek ***. Why would he want my soul? He's got a pretty good one already."
So I called the phone number. It didn't sound like you. He had a pretty thick Latin accent. But he had several credit cards that checked out under your name, your drivers license number, your social security number, and he even said he sleeps in bright red moose print pj's. He didn't seem to know anything about Derek Land, so I didn't believe him, and canceled the sale.
What happened down there?
Sounds to me like the guy who mugged my friend in Costa Rica tried to buy my other friend's soul on eBay.
Eureka Watkins! We've solved the mystery!
My friend Bryan decided to be funny and "sell his soul" on eBay. This was the email Bryan sent this morning:
So, I had my soul up for auction on eBay (It attracted some pretty high bids). The guy who bought it was from somewhere in South America. I was all ready to pack it up and ship it off to him, and then I noticed that his name was Derek ***. I thought "That's funny. I know Derek ***. Why would he want my soul? He's got a pretty good one already."
So I called the phone number. It didn't sound like you. He had a pretty thick Latin accent. But he had several credit cards that checked out under your name, your drivers license number, your social security number, and he even said he sleeps in bright red moose print pj's. He didn't seem to know anything about Derek Land, so I didn't believe him, and canceled the sale.
What happened down there?
Sounds to me like the guy who mugged my friend in Costa Rica tried to buy my other friend's soul on eBay.
Eureka Watkins! We've solved the mystery!
Thursday, March 24, 2005
Addiction
Oh. Sweet. Glory.
Reese's is making peanut butter cups in the form of Easter eggs for the holiday and they are sweet ecstasy in a brightly colored foil wrapper.
Reese's is making peanut butter cups in the form of Easter eggs for the holiday and they are sweet ecstasy in a brightly colored foil wrapper.
There's no place like home
The light that comes in from the guest bathroom window and falls softly over my clean sparkling kitchen counter.
The landing half way up the stairs has a little ledge that I use as a window seat sometimes when I read or just look out to watch the rain.
My huge beautiful bedroom with vaulted ceilings, overhead fan and strong white double French doors.
The porch outside my front door that allowed me to watch thunder and lightening storms in the summer while I lazily strummed my guitar.
The hanging light with a dimmer switch that is suspended at just the right height over my kitchen table.
The little space just outside my bedroom door that would be perfect for a large indoor plant, that I never got around to buying.
The walk-in closet bigger than any of my rooms in college.
The little community park just across the street, hidden from the outside and only used by the members of my neighborhood.
The gazebo in the middle of my complex that is never used except for the two minutes I pause in it on my walk back from the gym.
The walking distance to the grocery store.
The funny old man who lives next door and spends every evening in the summer listening to the radio on his porch.
The screen door which allows me to let the breeze and sunlight flow in on a warm afternoon without letting any bugs in.
The memories I have of some of my favorite people being there.
All things I'll miss when I move out of my place on Sunday.
The landing half way up the stairs has a little ledge that I use as a window seat sometimes when I read or just look out to watch the rain.
My huge beautiful bedroom with vaulted ceilings, overhead fan and strong white double French doors.
The porch outside my front door that allowed me to watch thunder and lightening storms in the summer while I lazily strummed my guitar.
The hanging light with a dimmer switch that is suspended at just the right height over my kitchen table.
The little space just outside my bedroom door that would be perfect for a large indoor plant, that I never got around to buying.
The walk-in closet bigger than any of my rooms in college.
The little community park just across the street, hidden from the outside and only used by the members of my neighborhood.
The gazebo in the middle of my complex that is never used except for the two minutes I pause in it on my walk back from the gym.
The walking distance to the grocery store.
The funny old man who lives next door and spends every evening in the summer listening to the radio on his porch.
The screen door which allows me to let the breeze and sunlight flow in on a warm afternoon without letting any bugs in.
The memories I have of some of my favorite people being there.
All things I'll miss when I move out of my place on Sunday.
Wednesday, March 23, 2005
Ode to the Ear Doctor
Can I just take a minute to be that silly stupid girl who adores her boyfriend?
Ok, thanks.
He is such an amazing person. This week is his spring break and instead of going off somewhere and doing something fun with his friends he decided to stay in town with me since I can't leave like everyone else. So sweet.
We've been spending every free moment with each other for the last couple of weeks and it is great. He's funny and gets me so well.
When I decided to move there wasn't even a second thought in his mind that he'd help me out. He wanted to help me.
Also, we can talk. I mean really talk. He is interested in what I have to say and what I think. If he has questions about our relationship, he asks them. If he wonders what I think about politics, he asks me. If he wants to go see a movie, he asks what I want to see.
Not only that, but he thinks I'm funny. He thinks my weird traits are cute and endearing.
Sometimes he doesn't like what I do, and he TELLS me that. He doesn't get upset and clam up.
He doesn't always let me have my way. (A very good thing for me)
He thinks of my needs before his own.
He tries to always be a better boyfriend/friend/confidant/man.
He is dedicated to his religion and takes it seriously.
He's just great.
Ok, thanks.
He is such an amazing person. This week is his spring break and instead of going off somewhere and doing something fun with his friends he decided to stay in town with me since I can't leave like everyone else. So sweet.
We've been spending every free moment with each other for the last couple of weeks and it is great. He's funny and gets me so well.
When I decided to move there wasn't even a second thought in his mind that he'd help me out. He wanted to help me.
Also, we can talk. I mean really talk. He is interested in what I have to say and what I think. If he has questions about our relationship, he asks them. If he wonders what I think about politics, he asks me. If he wants to go see a movie, he asks what I want to see.
Not only that, but he thinks I'm funny. He thinks my weird traits are cute and endearing.
Sometimes he doesn't like what I do, and he TELLS me that. He doesn't get upset and clam up.
He doesn't always let me have my way. (A very good thing for me)
He thinks of my needs before his own.
He tries to always be a better boyfriend/friend/confidant/man.
He is dedicated to his religion and takes it seriously.
He's just great.
Tuesday, March 22, 2005
Am I really weird?
Last night my sister passed a kidney stone. I felt so bad for her because I know that they hurt like a mo fo.
Anyway, when I talked to her this morning I asked if she'd taken a picture of the stone.
She reacted like I was crazy and gross to even think about taking a picture of something like that.
I just thought it would be interesting to document how small that little beast was that caused so much pain.
If it had been me, I probably would have taken a picture and then posted it here for all to enjoy.
Is that really strange?
Anyway, when I talked to her this morning I asked if she'd taken a picture of the stone.
She reacted like I was crazy and gross to even think about taking a picture of something like that.
I just thought it would be interesting to document how small that little beast was that caused so much pain.
If it had been me, I probably would have taken a picture and then posted it here for all to enjoy.
Is that really strange?
Frustration
Yesterday I systematically emailed every Stanford Mechanical Engineering professor whose research is remotely interesting and asked them for money.
I groveled.
I begged.
I pleaded.
I offered to grade papers or do grunt work.
On my way home from work I flipped on the radio. This girl was talking about how she bought her finace a $90K truck as an engagement present only to have to guy cheat on her 3 weeks later. Instead of demanding the truck back in court, she decided to just let him have it. She said, "I'm a trust fund kid so I paid for it in cash and it doesn't really make that much of a difference to me"
I was instantly ENRAGED!
It seemed so backward that some 22 year old trust fund kid dropped $90K on a guy who cheated on her and I'm sitting here ready to sell my soul for someone to pay my $44K tuition to the second best engineering program in the country. Surely that money would be better spent on my education than some moron's transportation?!?!?!
I can't even afford the $300 plane ticket to get out there for their prospective grad visit day on April 4.
Just another indication of how the whole universe is out of balance.
I groveled.
I begged.
I pleaded.
I offered to grade papers or do grunt work.
On my way home from work I flipped on the radio. This girl was talking about how she bought her finace a $90K truck as an engagement present only to have to guy cheat on her 3 weeks later. Instead of demanding the truck back in court, she decided to just let him have it. She said, "I'm a trust fund kid so I paid for it in cash and it doesn't really make that much of a difference to me"
I was instantly ENRAGED!
It seemed so backward that some 22 year old trust fund kid dropped $90K on a guy who cheated on her and I'm sitting here ready to sell my soul for someone to pay my $44K tuition to the second best engineering program in the country. Surely that money would be better spent on my education than some moron's transportation?!?!?!
I can't even afford the $300 plane ticket to get out there for their prospective grad visit day on April 4.
Just another indication of how the whole universe is out of balance.
Monday, March 21, 2005
Colorado's Own Ripley's Believe-it or Not
Saturday the ear doctor and I drove an hour and a half away from the mountains into the flat, drab plains of Eastern Colorado in pursuit of the bizarre.
We'd heard about the Genoa Tower and wanted to check it out.
It was INSANE.
Every square inch of this place was covered in junk.
We met and hung out with the owner, Jerry Chubbuk. He was a character. The tour cost $1 each and was worth every 100 pennies. Before starting the tour he gave us a chance to win our money back. If we could correctly guess 20 items in a row he'd refund our money. I got one of the 20.
As we wandered through the 21 rooms filled with every bit of imaginable junk I was completely overwhelmed. Things were attached to every square inch of the structure. Sharp saw blades were suspended overhead by a twist of rusty wire and a screw.
My favorites had to be the stuffed people at the top of the tower, the 2 headed stuffed calf and the carcass of a fetal pig with 8 legs.
I do'nt think Jerry makes a boat load of money off his tours since it was Saturday afternoon and we only saw 2 other couples there. In fact, I don't even think he makes enough to turn on the heat because it was freezing out there. The only amenity out there was electricity. No plumbing necessitated making do without some standard convienences.
If anyone is every driving cross country on I-70, do NOT miss the chance to check this place out. It blew my mind.
We'd heard about the Genoa Tower and wanted to check it out.
It was INSANE.
Every square inch of this place was covered in junk.
We met and hung out with the owner, Jerry Chubbuk. He was a character. The tour cost $1 each and was worth every 100 pennies. Before starting the tour he gave us a chance to win our money back. If we could correctly guess 20 items in a row he'd refund our money. I got one of the 20.
As we wandered through the 21 rooms filled with every bit of imaginable junk I was completely overwhelmed. Things were attached to every square inch of the structure. Sharp saw blades were suspended overhead by a twist of rusty wire and a screw.
My favorites had to be the stuffed people at the top of the tower, the 2 headed stuffed calf and the carcass of a fetal pig with 8 legs.
I do'nt think Jerry makes a boat load of money off his tours since it was Saturday afternoon and we only saw 2 other couples there. In fact, I don't even think he makes enough to turn on the heat because it was freezing out there. The only amenity out there was electricity. No plumbing necessitated making do without some standard convienences.
If anyone is every driving cross country on I-70, do NOT miss the chance to check this place out. It blew my mind.
Friday, March 18, 2005
Brett's Birthday
Here are my pals. Sorry for the poor photo quality...I'm pissed that my digital camera does this sometimes.
From left to right:
Kristian, Nicole (you can only see a bit of her face ), Eric, Calvin, Ear Doctor, Jocelyn
From left to right:
Kristian, Nicole (you can only see a bit of her face ), Eric, Calvin, Ear Doctor, Jocelyn
Thursday, March 17, 2005
Just an observation
Poodle got me thinking.
Where does the line between loving someone with your whole heart and becoming a doormat lie? Is the definition purely internal or is there a necessary external measure used? Can someone act and feel the EXACT some way, be a doormat in one situation and not in another? Is it dependent on a second party or not?
Most of the discussion I've heard about love states that real love is when selfishness vanishes. Does that mean that the "self" vanishes as well? I sure hope not because this is antithetical to my personality. Does that mean I'll never really be able to love someone else because I am independent?
I say no.
Love is not love unless the "self" survives. When someone "looses themselves" in love they have not truly attained it, because THEY are not in it anymore...Just a shadow of who they used to be.
It's really simple math.
If you take two separate people, combined them, melt them, join them, erase they old personas to make one entity you have LESS than what you started with.
If you take two separate people, join them but still keep them separate entities you really create 3: one person, one person, and one relationship.
You end up having more than you had to start.
Any thoughts?
Where does the line between loving someone with your whole heart and becoming a doormat lie? Is the definition purely internal or is there a necessary external measure used? Can someone act and feel the EXACT some way, be a doormat in one situation and not in another? Is it dependent on a second party or not?
Most of the discussion I've heard about love states that real love is when selfishness vanishes. Does that mean that the "self" vanishes as well? I sure hope not because this is antithetical to my personality. Does that mean I'll never really be able to love someone else because I am independent?
I say no.
Love is not love unless the "self" survives. When someone "looses themselves" in love they have not truly attained it, because THEY are not in it anymore...Just a shadow of who they used to be.
It's really simple math.
If you take two separate people, combined them, melt them, join them, erase they old personas to make one entity you have LESS than what you started with.
If you take two separate people, join them but still keep them separate entities you really create 3: one person, one person, and one relationship.
You end up having more than you had to start.
Any thoughts?
A great compliment
Last night was my friend Brett's 30th birthday. After we'd all finished dinner, they brought out the pile of gifts for him to open.
He grabbed mine first out of the stack, and said, "Katie, you always give such thoughtful, creative gifts"
Isn't that nice? I was really pleased with that.
BTW-I got him a Simpsons puzzle and some apple juice. Strange? Sure, but to understand the perfection of this gift I have to take you back....
One Friday night about 5 months ago I dropped in late at his house to pick something up. All the lights in the house were off, but there was a triangular sliver of golden light coming from the cracked open spare room. As I got closer I could hear the unmistakable voice of miss Dolly Parton softly crooning. I pushed the door open slightly and saw one of the funniest sights.
Brett was sitting with his back to the door in front folding card table, slowly tapping his right foot. He was putting together a puzzle and languidly sipping a tall tumbler of apple cider.
Such a party animal.
He grabbed mine first out of the stack, and said, "Katie, you always give such thoughtful, creative gifts"
Isn't that nice? I was really pleased with that.
BTW-I got him a Simpsons puzzle and some apple juice. Strange? Sure, but to understand the perfection of this gift I have to take you back....
One Friday night about 5 months ago I dropped in late at his house to pick something up. All the lights in the house were off, but there was a triangular sliver of golden light coming from the cracked open spare room. As I got closer I could hear the unmistakable voice of miss Dolly Parton softly crooning. I pushed the door open slightly and saw one of the funniest sights.
Brett was sitting with his back to the door in front folding card table, slowly tapping his right foot. He was putting together a puzzle and languidly sipping a tall tumbler of apple cider.
Such a party animal.
Wednesday, March 16, 2005
A night out with the girls
Well, it wasn't really "out" and it wasn't really with MY "girls" but it was surprisingly fun.
Last night we had an all-girl church activity where we were supposed to bring stuff that represented our talents so that other people could walk around, look at them and instantly understand who we are and what we're all about.
Yeah.
Tall order.
Between work, the gym, and hitting the mall for the finishing touches of my little sister's birthday present, I only had about 10 minutes in which to create this display that would fully encompass me.
I opened up the back seat of my car and started tossing stuff in.
I threw in my violin, my guitar, some CDs, a tall stack of books I've just finished, the 10 journals I've filled in my life, a bunch of photo albums, sheet music, my ski boots, goggles and gloves, a couple of frisbees, two huge posters I've made for work and some engineering text books, a patridge and a pear tree.
I drove like a madman to get there on time. When I showed up, short of breath, I realized that not everyone had been so quite to offer their entire lives to the event.
People had a painting they had done, or a photo of their family or a book of piano music. I was kind of embarrassed by the shear volume of stuff I'd brought, but I pulled it all out. I figured that just having that much stuff would show people how splintered and fragmented I feel these days.
Anyway, I ended up spending most of the night trying to explain what I do at work to a group of people with complete blank stares on their faces. Engineering tends to do this to people. I think it intimidates a lot of people, but I wish they would just listen and give it a chance because it really isn't as technical and difficult to grasp as they think.
Last night we had an all-girl church activity where we were supposed to bring stuff that represented our talents so that other people could walk around, look at them and instantly understand who we are and what we're all about.
Yeah.
Tall order.
Between work, the gym, and hitting the mall for the finishing touches of my little sister's birthday present, I only had about 10 minutes in which to create this display that would fully encompass me.
I opened up the back seat of my car and started tossing stuff in.
I threw in my violin, my guitar, some CDs, a tall stack of books I've just finished, the 10 journals I've filled in my life, a bunch of photo albums, sheet music, my ski boots, goggles and gloves, a couple of frisbees, two huge posters I've made for work and some engineering text books, a patridge and a pear tree.
I drove like a madman to get there on time. When I showed up, short of breath, I realized that not everyone had been so quite to offer their entire lives to the event.
People had a painting they had done, or a photo of their family or a book of piano music. I was kind of embarrassed by the shear volume of stuff I'd brought, but I pulled it all out. I figured that just having that much stuff would show people how splintered and fragmented I feel these days.
Anyway, I ended up spending most of the night trying to explain what I do at work to a group of people with complete blank stares on their faces. Engineering tends to do this to people. I think it intimidates a lot of people, but I wish they would just listen and give it a chance because it really isn't as technical and difficult to grasp as they think.
Tuesday, March 15, 2005
Photo of the Day
This shot was taken from the window of a little 4 passenger plane going up over Corona pass in Colorado about a month ago. It was breathtaking!
3 things I'd rather be doing right now
1. Skiing. We just had a huge storm here on Sunday and I bet the snow is deep and fresh. Plus, it is sunny and bright out so I bet it is a perfect ski day.
2. Packing. I know, I usually hate packing like any normal person, but I'm moving in for a month with Sarah so it will be fun times for us for the months of April and May. It's been SO long since I was living with someone I consider my best friend.
3. Napping. I'm tired and my bed was SO soft and inviting this morning.
So, what are yours?
2. Packing. I know, I usually hate packing like any normal person, but I'm moving in for a month with Sarah so it will be fun times for us for the months of April and May. It's been SO long since I was living with someone I consider my best friend.
3. Napping. I'm tired and my bed was SO soft and inviting this morning.
So, what are yours?
Monday, March 14, 2005
Pictures from Texas
Saturday it was 90 degrees in Dallas. We took a tour of the 6th floor museum and saw the window from which JFK was shot. I thought it was a little morbid that they painted a big white X on the ground at the approximate location of the car at the time of the shooting.
We walked around the West End of town and decided we didn't like it that much because it felt "manufactured" and "touristy." We all prefer having real city experiences.
Sunday morning we spent walking around the arts district. This was much more enjoyable. As we were going back to our car people were starting to line up for the St. Patrick's day parade. I felt a real closeness to all the red headed people. There was one red headed little girl that was so cute I found myself staring at her. In my distracted state I walked into a low marble slab and now have a nice little purple bruise developing.
Downtown Dallas. I thought it was so beautiful to take a picture of the reflection of buildings off a total glass sky scraper. The twirly ice cream cone building is a tribute to gratitude. I thought that idea was particularly appealing.
You're supposed to walk through this big gold ring and think of all the things you're grateful for and all the other people who are less fortunate than you. I guess is is supposed to make you realize your responsibility to help others for the advancement of the common good. Derek stood in it, with arms outstretched, and pretended he was Da Vinci's famous Anatomy piece.
We walked around the West End of town and decided we didn't like it that much because it felt "manufactured" and "touristy." We all prefer having real city experiences.
Sunday morning we spent walking around the arts district. This was much more enjoyable. As we were going back to our car people were starting to line up for the St. Patrick's day parade. I felt a real closeness to all the red headed people. There was one red headed little girl that was so cute I found myself staring at her. In my distracted state I walked into a low marble slab and now have a nice little purple bruise developing.
Downtown Dallas. I thought it was so beautiful to take a picture of the reflection of buildings off a total glass sky scraper. The twirly ice cream cone building is a tribute to gratitude. I thought that idea was particularly appealing.
You're supposed to walk through this big gold ring and think of all the things you're grateful for and all the other people who are less fortunate than you. I guess is is supposed to make you realize your responsibility to help others for the advancement of the common good. Derek stood in it, with arms outstretched, and pretended he was Da Vinci's famous Anatomy piece.
Inverted advice column
I've always thought of myself as a pretty good girlfriend, but lately I've started to doubt my preconceived notions. Perhaps even I could improve in this area, but I just don't know what I could do to be better. In an effort to grow and learn I'd like to pose this question:
What are 3 traits of an awesome girlfriend?
Inquiring minds want to know.
What are 3 traits of an awesome girlfriend?
Inquiring minds want to know.
A day of rest
I like walking around big cities on Sunday. Even though a lot of people don't use it as a day of worship anymore, it is still a day of rest, and a big city like Dallas is living proof of that.
As I walked down the streets, looking up from my cement bound vantage to the tops of buildings that truly seem to scrape the sky, this was the thought that passed through my mind, "where are all the people?"
Sunday is the day when the city slows down. It takes a hiccup and lets time hang for a day, taking that much needed exhale.
I like feeling the marked contrast between Sunday and the rest of the week that you get in big cities. You don't get that anywhere else.
As I walked down the streets, looking up from my cement bound vantage to the tops of buildings that truly seem to scrape the sky, this was the thought that passed through my mind, "where are all the people?"
Sunday is the day when the city slows down. It takes a hiccup and lets time hang for a day, taking that much needed exhale.
I like feeling the marked contrast between Sunday and the rest of the week that you get in big cities. You don't get that anywhere else.
Wednesday, March 09, 2005
Pure Terror
I live in a 3 bedroom/2.5 bathroom condo alone.
I love living alone because it means that any mess in the house is intentional and I can deal with it if I want, but if I don't want to then I don't. I come and go as I please, cook dinner whenever I want to, have total control of the TV and pretty much live as the lord and master of my domain. It's great.
Last night I cooked a full beautiful dinner for the ear doctor and a couple of missionaries.
After dinner the missionaries left and the ear doctor and I watched Gilmore Girls and the amazing race. (Note: the ear doctor did a lab write up during Gilmore girls. It was his first time watching it and his favorite character was Kirk. Men just don't "get" that show.)
Anyway, he had to leave at 9 to go work on homework with a buddy, which left me home, alone at 9 pm.
I haven't been home, alone, and awake at 9 pm in FOREVER. I decided to get some laundry and dishes done while unwinding and watching and episode of Law and Order:SVU. It was an episode about a psycho rapist who preyed on young virgins. Yikes. It was riveting and freaky and deliciously entertaining. During the commercials, I muted the TV for a moment and couldn't hear the washing machine going.
In my head I tried to determine which cycle it should be on, and I immediately got annoyed because, by my count, it should definitely still be going. A little cranked, I went upstairs to check on it.
As I opened the laundry room door I was immediately struck by the scene which presented itself. There was my washer, full of clothes, and soapy water to the brim with the door wide open.
The first thought that ran through my mind was, "oh my gosh, some psycho rapist has somehow sneaked into my house and is toying with my mind and luring me upstairs into his clutches by opening the lid of the washer and stopping the cycle."
As I shut the lid and started up the cycle again, I dialed 911 on my cell phone, poised my right thumb over the send button just in case, and I picked up the hammer nearby. I don't know why I didn't just run from my apartment, but I thought I'd look around. (Suddenly all those damsels in B movie horror flicks don't look quite so dumb)
I moved slowly past each of the two empty bedrooms. I made a quick glance in each. If someone was hiding, I definitely wouldn't have seen them with the cursory look I paid to each, but I felt a slight reassurance that I had indeed looked in each room.
I glanced into the bathroom at the end of the hall. Empty (I didn't check behind the shower curtain because I was too scared).
I entered my bedroom. Empty.
I went into my attached bathroom. Empty.
I peered into my attached huge, dark walk-in closet. Empty.
I even had the guts to open the glass door of my shower. Empty.
A slight sigh of relief escaped from my tense lungs.
I set down the hammer, cleared 911 from my phone and went back downstairs to the TV.
Thoughts from every horror movie I'd ever seen (including trailers) flitted through my mind for the next 10 minutes.
I tried to think of some mechanical reason why the lid would pop open....Pressure differential, spring/switch failure, imbalance in the load...Nothing made sense.
because I really am just a little girl at heart when I'm scared, I called my mom. She told me to call the ear doctor and have him come and look the place over. Then, she said that I probably just tossed the soap in on top of my clothes and forgot to shut the door, but I was SURE I had closed it.
I went to bed scared and alone.
This morning as I was in a rush to get ready I was doing 10 things at once. Just as I was about to run out of the door I thought that I should rotate the next load of laundry. I entered the laundry room and what I saw almost made me laugh out loud.
I'd started the load, but forgot to put in my clothes or shut the lid. It was sitting there exactly like last night: open, full of water, silently laughing at me and my ridiculous panic attack.
What a nerd, huh?
I love living alone because it means that any mess in the house is intentional and I can deal with it if I want, but if I don't want to then I don't. I come and go as I please, cook dinner whenever I want to, have total control of the TV and pretty much live as the lord and master of my domain. It's great.
Last night I cooked a full beautiful dinner for the ear doctor and a couple of missionaries.
After dinner the missionaries left and the ear doctor and I watched Gilmore Girls and the amazing race. (Note: the ear doctor did a lab write up during Gilmore girls. It was his first time watching it and his favorite character was Kirk. Men just don't "get" that show.)
Anyway, he had to leave at 9 to go work on homework with a buddy, which left me home, alone at 9 pm.
I haven't been home, alone, and awake at 9 pm in FOREVER. I decided to get some laundry and dishes done while unwinding and watching and episode of Law and Order:SVU. It was an episode about a psycho rapist who preyed on young virgins. Yikes. It was riveting and freaky and deliciously entertaining. During the commercials, I muted the TV for a moment and couldn't hear the washing machine going.
In my head I tried to determine which cycle it should be on, and I immediately got annoyed because, by my count, it should definitely still be going. A little cranked, I went upstairs to check on it.
As I opened the laundry room door I was immediately struck by the scene which presented itself. There was my washer, full of clothes, and soapy water to the brim with the door wide open.
The first thought that ran through my mind was, "oh my gosh, some psycho rapist has somehow sneaked into my house and is toying with my mind and luring me upstairs into his clutches by opening the lid of the washer and stopping the cycle."
As I shut the lid and started up the cycle again, I dialed 911 on my cell phone, poised my right thumb over the send button just in case, and I picked up the hammer nearby. I don't know why I didn't just run from my apartment, but I thought I'd look around. (Suddenly all those damsels in B movie horror flicks don't look quite so dumb)
I moved slowly past each of the two empty bedrooms. I made a quick glance in each. If someone was hiding, I definitely wouldn't have seen them with the cursory look I paid to each, but I felt a slight reassurance that I had indeed looked in each room.
I glanced into the bathroom at the end of the hall. Empty (I didn't check behind the shower curtain because I was too scared).
I entered my bedroom. Empty.
I went into my attached bathroom. Empty.
I peered into my attached huge, dark walk-in closet. Empty.
I even had the guts to open the glass door of my shower. Empty.
A slight sigh of relief escaped from my tense lungs.
I set down the hammer, cleared 911 from my phone and went back downstairs to the TV.
Thoughts from every horror movie I'd ever seen (including trailers) flitted through my mind for the next 10 minutes.
I tried to think of some mechanical reason why the lid would pop open....Pressure differential, spring/switch failure, imbalance in the load...Nothing made sense.
because I really am just a little girl at heart when I'm scared, I called my mom. She told me to call the ear doctor and have him come and look the place over. Then, she said that I probably just tossed the soap in on top of my clothes and forgot to shut the door, but I was SURE I had closed it.
I went to bed scared and alone.
This morning as I was in a rush to get ready I was doing 10 things at once. Just as I was about to run out of the door I thought that I should rotate the next load of laundry. I entered the laundry room and what I saw almost made me laugh out loud.
I'd started the load, but forgot to put in my clothes or shut the lid. It was sitting there exactly like last night: open, full of water, silently laughing at me and my ridiculous panic attack.
What a nerd, huh?
Overactive Climate Control
Right now my office is about 80 degrees. Its only 50 degrees outside, but for some reason my office is SWELTERING. Is management trying to put me back to sleep?!?!?
Tuesday, March 08, 2005
Great News
I got accepted to Stanford last night
and
I'm torn.
I don't really know if I'm happy about it or not. I know that if I'd been rejected I would have been really pissed off and secretly doubted myself.
I just don't have the same elation I experienced last time.
Two years ago I walked out to my mail box with butterflies in my stomach. It felt like I had waited forever and heard back from every other school. But not Stanford. The #2 school in the country. The real test of how I stack up, not only to other undergrads at my school, but undergrads all over the country. Because I am perhaps the world's most competitive little thing on the planet, this was a big deal to me.
As I opened it I caught a glimpse of a circular seal with a lone pine tree in the middle. Yikes.
For a moment I just stared at the white envelope.
Tentatively, I opened the seal.
The first word of the first paragraph of the first page was this: "Congratulations"
Waves of relief and reassuring self confidence washed over me.
I immediately hopped in my car and sped over to Derek's house. As I climbed the steps I pretended to be depressed. I did my best to radiate gloom and embarrassment. He opened the door and I was working up eyes full of tears. I announced that I had been rejected. For a moment I had him, but, knowing me as well as he did, he said, "No you didn't" and I couldn't hold it in, I ran to him, jumped into his arms and we spun around the front room of his little house.
I was so happy.
This is different.
I'm still reaffirmed, but I'm pretty sure I can't go, which is depressing. They didn't offer me any financial aid and they probably won't. There are a million kids who want to get into the program who are willing to pay that they don't mind letting me go.
I don't even really want to take a trip out there for their grad admit day because I know I'll fall in love with the campus and the professors and the program all over again and be tempted to just go throw caution to the wind and go there.
Plus there's the ear doctor.
When I told him last night I could almost feel the effort he had to put into saying congratulations.
UGH.
and
I'm torn.
I don't really know if I'm happy about it or not. I know that if I'd been rejected I would have been really pissed off and secretly doubted myself.
I just don't have the same elation I experienced last time.
Two years ago I walked out to my mail box with butterflies in my stomach. It felt like I had waited forever and heard back from every other school. But not Stanford. The #2 school in the country. The real test of how I stack up, not only to other undergrads at my school, but undergrads all over the country. Because I am perhaps the world's most competitive little thing on the planet, this was a big deal to me.
As I opened it I caught a glimpse of a circular seal with a lone pine tree in the middle. Yikes.
For a moment I just stared at the white envelope.
Tentatively, I opened the seal.
The first word of the first paragraph of the first page was this: "Congratulations"
Waves of relief and reassuring self confidence washed over me.
I immediately hopped in my car and sped over to Derek's house. As I climbed the steps I pretended to be depressed. I did my best to radiate gloom and embarrassment. He opened the door and I was working up eyes full of tears. I announced that I had been rejected. For a moment I had him, but, knowing me as well as he did, he said, "No you didn't" and I couldn't hold it in, I ran to him, jumped into his arms and we spun around the front room of his little house.
I was so happy.
This is different.
I'm still reaffirmed, but I'm pretty sure I can't go, which is depressing. They didn't offer me any financial aid and they probably won't. There are a million kids who want to get into the program who are willing to pay that they don't mind letting me go.
I don't even really want to take a trip out there for their grad admit day because I know I'll fall in love with the campus and the professors and the program all over again and be tempted to just go throw caution to the wind and go there.
Plus there's the ear doctor.
When I told him last night I could almost feel the effort he had to put into saying congratulations.
UGH.
Stormy Weather
Right now a big storm is rolling into Boulder.
The sky is flat, drab gray.
The leafless tress whip violently in the cruel winds that precede the imminent weather change.
And I like it.
The sky is flat, drab gray.
The leafless tress whip violently in the cruel winds that precede the imminent weather change.
And I like it.
Monday, March 07, 2005
Sick
I can hear my manager clipping his fingernails through my office wall. Gross. Do that kind of thing at home.
Who does that?
My sister drove over to Colorado to see me this weekend. She had everything packed up in her little green civic, picked up Sarah's sister to drive with her and then called me. Her first words were, "ok, we're all packed up, how to we get there?"
Who doesn't plan ahead, get directions, at least have a vague idea of how to get to the end of an 8 hour road trip? Only my sister.
Saturday morning I woke up early and went to the grocery store. While I was at the store Mags woke up and wandered down to the TV and flipped it on. All of the sudden, the doorbell rang. She was instantly freaked out. She was torn because she was pretty sure that no one should be coming to my house that early on a Saturday morning. After a minute or two she worked up the courage to go and peep out my window. No one was there. She opened the door and found that the ear doctor had left us a dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts. From that point on Maggie's heart had been won.
Whose emotions are easily bought with a white and green striped box full of sugary treats? That'd be my sister.
Saturday afternoon Mags and I were chillin at my house after going to the movies. The ear doctor was on his way over to meet her. This is the first time he'd met anyone from my family. They met and things went just fine. The three of us were sitting on the fouton and Mags looked over and the ear doctor and said, "You have a lot of arm hair."
Who makes a comment like that to someone who might be feeling a little awkward in a potentially intimidating situation? Only my cute little sister.
Sunday my sister could only stay to the first hour of church, so she had to leave in the middle. We were almost out the door when she realized that she hadn't said goodbye to the ear doctor. She turned, ran back into the building and met up with him. There was a momentary pause and then she just threw her arms around his neck. They said goodbye and I walked her out to her car. When we were out of earshot, she said, "was the hug ok?"
Who asks if giving your sister's boyfriend a hug goodbye is ok or not? Only my precious little sister.
Who doesn't plan ahead, get directions, at least have a vague idea of how to get to the end of an 8 hour road trip? Only my sister.
Saturday morning I woke up early and went to the grocery store. While I was at the store Mags woke up and wandered down to the TV and flipped it on. All of the sudden, the doorbell rang. She was instantly freaked out. She was torn because she was pretty sure that no one should be coming to my house that early on a Saturday morning. After a minute or two she worked up the courage to go and peep out my window. No one was there. She opened the door and found that the ear doctor had left us a dozen Krispy Kreme doughnuts. From that point on Maggie's heart had been won.
Whose emotions are easily bought with a white and green striped box full of sugary treats? That'd be my sister.
Saturday afternoon Mags and I were chillin at my house after going to the movies. The ear doctor was on his way over to meet her. This is the first time he'd met anyone from my family. They met and things went just fine. The three of us were sitting on the fouton and Mags looked over and the ear doctor and said, "You have a lot of arm hair."
Who makes a comment like that to someone who might be feeling a little awkward in a potentially intimidating situation? Only my cute little sister.
Sunday my sister could only stay to the first hour of church, so she had to leave in the middle. We were almost out the door when she realized that she hadn't said goodbye to the ear doctor. She turned, ran back into the building and met up with him. There was a momentary pause and then she just threw her arms around his neck. They said goodbye and I walked her out to her car. When we were out of earshot, she said, "was the hug ok?"
Who asks if giving your sister's boyfriend a hug goodbye is ok or not? Only my precious little sister.
Friday, March 04, 2005
The weekend
So my little sister is driving over from Utah to see me this weekend.
I am STOKED.
This will be the first time she meets the ear doctor.
Last night over dinner he confessed a tiny bit of nervousness over meeting her. In an effort to feel more prepared he asked me what she was like.
How do you describe someone that you've known your whole life? Someone's whose faults are endearing to you....so much so that you cease to see them as faults and think of them as critical character traits that make them who they are?
I started out by saying that she is SO much different from me. She is so...good. I don't think I've ever heard her say something mean about someone (except her high school enemy, Andrew). She always sees the best in people. I am prone to being catty and meanspirited at times, but Maggie...never.
The next thing that came to my mind was to say that she thinks I'm funny. Except when I'm poking her with a stick for 2 hours...and even then I have a sneaking suspicion that she thought it was funny (deep down).
Next, I thought she's not good at handling change. She gets flustered when she has to make a choice.
She likes plans. She likes making plans. She likes sticking to plans. She needs plans.
She's a loyal friend.
She's just plain beautiful.
That's why I'm excited to see her this weekend. She's great!
I am STOKED.
This will be the first time she meets the ear doctor.
Last night over dinner he confessed a tiny bit of nervousness over meeting her. In an effort to feel more prepared he asked me what she was like.
How do you describe someone that you've known your whole life? Someone's whose faults are endearing to you....so much so that you cease to see them as faults and think of them as critical character traits that make them who they are?
I started out by saying that she is SO much different from me. She is so...good. I don't think I've ever heard her say something mean about someone (except her high school enemy, Andrew). She always sees the best in people. I am prone to being catty and meanspirited at times, but Maggie...never.
The next thing that came to my mind was to say that she thinks I'm funny. Except when I'm poking her with a stick for 2 hours...and even then I have a sneaking suspicion that she thought it was funny (deep down).
Next, I thought she's not good at handling change. She gets flustered when she has to make a choice.
She likes plans. She likes making plans. She likes sticking to plans. She needs plans.
She's a loyal friend.
She's just plain beautiful.
That's why I'm excited to see her this weekend. She's great!
Monday, February 28, 2005
Officially prohibited from using Office Supplies
So I'm a retard.
I was just loading new staples into my stapler. The new row was in correctly, and I was attempting to close it all up. Instead of just banging it shut like normal person, I decided to squeeze it shut between my thumb and forefinger.
With a satisfying click it snapped shut, ejecting a strong steel sliver into the meat of my thumb. Waves of pain shooting through my system, vision blurring from pain, I attempt to slowly remove the offending article. With every tiny motion, searing blots of pain race up my arm. I grit my teeth and yanked it out.
Looking like a vampire bite that slightly missed his mark, two perfect beads of red blood appear and stand as evidence against my total inaptitude.
Now I wear a "flesh toned" fabric bandaid around my left thumb as a reminder to myself to be wary of seemingly innocuous office supplies.
I was just loading new staples into my stapler. The new row was in correctly, and I was attempting to close it all up. Instead of just banging it shut like normal person, I decided to squeeze it shut between my thumb and forefinger.
With a satisfying click it snapped shut, ejecting a strong steel sliver into the meat of my thumb. Waves of pain shooting through my system, vision blurring from pain, I attempt to slowly remove the offending article. With every tiny motion, searing blots of pain race up my arm. I grit my teeth and yanked it out.
Looking like a vampire bite that slightly missed his mark, two perfect beads of red blood appear and stand as evidence against my total inaptitude.
Now I wear a "flesh toned" fabric bandaid around my left thumb as a reminder to myself to be wary of seemingly innocuous office supplies.
Dating Dynamics
Read Bryan's post called "An Unusually Effective Escape Tactic" before reading this post.
Ahhh, the posturing...
That post on Bryan's blog today made me smile. I haven't been to one of those big Mormon parties where you're goal is to pick people up since....Last October? Yeah, last October.
Picture this:
I had just had a horrible argument with my ex-boyfriend and was heading home a lot earlier on a Friday night than I wanted to be. I remembered that my friend Greg had invited me down to a party in Denver. Out of desperation, I took him up on his offer. It was me, Greg, and the ear doctor. (this was before we started dating)
Anyway, we got to the party and I immediately split from those two. If I had been standing there with them all night I would have totally blocked any kind of potential picking-up that might occur. It would be awkward. Plus, I didn't want anyone there thinking I was "with" either of the, thereby killing any potential for me in the room.
So, I was flying solo. I didn't know ANYONE at the party besides those two guys.
Its hard to be a flagship girl without any background wind beneath your sails, but I did manage to get the hottest guy there to invite me to go to the next party his group was hopping to. I turned him down, took his number, but never ended up calling him.
The ear doctor and I got together 2 weeks later.
Interesting side note: I'm sure that some girls are ALWAYS flagship girls. They are the beautiful beyond belief girls. But, there are some middle of the road girls who are sometimes the flagships, sometimes the background. I fall into this category. It depends who I go out with. I really like being in this position because I get the best of both worlds.
Ahhh, the posturing...
That post on Bryan's blog today made me smile. I haven't been to one of those big Mormon parties where you're goal is to pick people up since....Last October? Yeah, last October.
Picture this:
I had just had a horrible argument with my ex-boyfriend and was heading home a lot earlier on a Friday night than I wanted to be. I remembered that my friend Greg had invited me down to a party in Denver. Out of desperation, I took him up on his offer. It was me, Greg, and the ear doctor. (this was before we started dating)
Anyway, we got to the party and I immediately split from those two. If I had been standing there with them all night I would have totally blocked any kind of potential picking-up that might occur. It would be awkward. Plus, I didn't want anyone there thinking I was "with" either of the, thereby killing any potential for me in the room.
So, I was flying solo. I didn't know ANYONE at the party besides those two guys.
Its hard to be a flagship girl without any background wind beneath your sails, but I did manage to get the hottest guy there to invite me to go to the next party his group was hopping to. I turned him down, took his number, but never ended up calling him.
The ear doctor and I got together 2 weeks later.
Interesting side note: I'm sure that some girls are ALWAYS flagship girls. They are the beautiful beyond belief girls. But, there are some middle of the road girls who are sometimes the flagships, sometimes the background. I fall into this category. It depends who I go out with. I really like being in this position because I get the best of both worlds.
Friday, February 25, 2005
So Excited!
Next Thursday my work is paying for me to go down to Denver and volunteer at the third-annual Girls Exploring Science, Engineering, & Technology event.
I am REALLY stoked about this.
There will be about 800 7th and 8th grade girls all there to hear about different options for working in the science and technology fields.
I feel like the main reason there are so few girls in engineering is because a lot of them aren't exposed to it at all until they are in college. By then they think it is "too hard" for them to do.
It really isn't! And I love sharing that with younger generations.
I am REALLY stoked about this.
There will be about 800 7th and 8th grade girls all there to hear about different options for working in the science and technology fields.
I feel like the main reason there are so few girls in engineering is because a lot of them aren't exposed to it at all until they are in college. By then they think it is "too hard" for them to do.
It really isn't! And I love sharing that with younger generations.
Amber Alert
This morning as I was getting ready for work the DJs were talking about the nine year old little girl in Florida who was kidnapped out of her bed Wednesday night. I H-A-T-E hearing stories like this.
apparently her grandparents put her to bed Wednesday night, laid out her school clothes for the next day, and opened her window for a nice breeze.
Thursday morning her dad went in to wake her up and her little bed was empty, the clothes untouched, meaning somewhere there is a little brunette girl hidden away in her nightgown.
Yikes.
Anyway, the DJs this morning were talking about how they want to implant GPS chips into their children to locate them if they are snatched.
Caller after caller rang up the station and said that they would jump on the procedure for their children as soon as it was made available.
I've been mulling this over all morning and I'm still not sure how I feel about it.
It sucks that we live in a world where so many people are worried about psychos stealing their kids.
It sucks that the only way to feel safe is by implanting a metal chip into a child.
It sucks that this technology, if we start using it, is SO prone to being abused....Just look what someone did to Paris Hilton's Sidekick. If someone can remotely hack into a phone/organizer what do you think they could do to a GPS beacon implanted in some little 5 year old's shoulder.
It really sucks that this poor little girl is in trouble.
apparently her grandparents put her to bed Wednesday night, laid out her school clothes for the next day, and opened her window for a nice breeze.
Thursday morning her dad went in to wake her up and her little bed was empty, the clothes untouched, meaning somewhere there is a little brunette girl hidden away in her nightgown.
Yikes.
Anyway, the DJs this morning were talking about how they want to implant GPS chips into their children to locate them if they are snatched.
Caller after caller rang up the station and said that they would jump on the procedure for their children as soon as it was made available.
I've been mulling this over all morning and I'm still not sure how I feel about it.
It sucks that we live in a world where so many people are worried about psychos stealing their kids.
It sucks that the only way to feel safe is by implanting a metal chip into a child.
It sucks that this technology, if we start using it, is SO prone to being abused....Just look what someone did to Paris Hilton's Sidekick. If someone can remotely hack into a phone/organizer what do you think they could do to a GPS beacon implanted in some little 5 year old's shoulder.
It really sucks that this poor little girl is in trouble.
Kathy
In keeping with my new found theme...
Kathy is my best friend. My soulmate. The person who knows and understands me through and through. She's seen me through heartache and disappointment, through the mundane and banal, through the zeniths and conquests.
Kathy is FUNNY. When we sit down together she makes me laugh until my sides hurt. She knows how to crack a joke, send a funny look just at the right time, or make a weird noise.
Kathy is smart. She loves math and would probably love to be a high school math teacher.
Kathy is creative. She knows how to put a room together to make it look really cute. She is a really great stylist and can just tell which outfit is going to look great when put together.
Kathy is anal. The pots and pans have a specific correct way to be cleaned. Her shoes need to be put away in the proper place, don't even think about throwing them in the bottom of the closet. She is methodical in everything from the way she applies her makeup to the way she fixes her hair.
Kathy knows when its ok to be a little bit of a brat. She doesn't make me feel bad when I look at some ensembally challenged soul and I make a catty comment.
Kathy can dance.
Kathy is going to make a great mother. She is caring and supportive of me, and I know she'll be able to do that 100 times better for her new little baby.
Kathy is married to one of the funniest guys I've ever met. He's almost like me, just in male form. ;)
Kathy is talented. This girl opened a Shania Twain concert. Her voice is amazing and gives me chills whenever she uses it. Its not only the technique she uses, but her inflection and the way she conveys what she feels through the music is inspiring.
Kathy is the best fellow doughnut maker in the world.
Even though we haven't lived in the same state since high school, Kathy and I are still close and care immensely for each other.
Kathy is my best friend. My soulmate. The person who knows and understands me through and through. She's seen me through heartache and disappointment, through the mundane and banal, through the zeniths and conquests.
Kathy is FUNNY. When we sit down together she makes me laugh until my sides hurt. She knows how to crack a joke, send a funny look just at the right time, or make a weird noise.
Kathy is smart. She loves math and would probably love to be a high school math teacher.
Kathy is creative. She knows how to put a room together to make it look really cute. She is a really great stylist and can just tell which outfit is going to look great when put together.
Kathy is anal. The pots and pans have a specific correct way to be cleaned. Her shoes need to be put away in the proper place, don't even think about throwing them in the bottom of the closet. She is methodical in everything from the way she applies her makeup to the way she fixes her hair.
Kathy knows when its ok to be a little bit of a brat. She doesn't make me feel bad when I look at some ensembally challenged soul and I make a catty comment.
Kathy can dance.
Kathy is going to make a great mother. She is caring and supportive of me, and I know she'll be able to do that 100 times better for her new little baby.
Kathy is married to one of the funniest guys I've ever met. He's almost like me, just in male form. ;)
Kathy is talented. This girl opened a Shania Twain concert. Her voice is amazing and gives me chills whenever she uses it. Its not only the technique she uses, but her inflection and the way she conveys what she feels through the music is inspiring.
Kathy is the best fellow doughnut maker in the world.
Even though we haven't lived in the same state since high school, Kathy and I are still close and care immensely for each other.
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Sarah
So I've been thinking about things to write about today and I've decided that at the moment, I'm blocked for things to write about myself. Instead I thought I'd write about my best Colorado friend.
Sarah is a pistol. She is bright and tough and in charge. She knows what she wants and how to get it. She is very committed to her studies...More than anyone I have ever met and that is so impressive to me.
Sarah is also real. She'll tell you what she thinks, but still has the ability to listen to your point. She doesn't sugar coat, hide, or wilt under pressure. She rises to it.
Sarah is tough. I've never met a girl who can run up a mountain like this girl. She actually enjoys the feeling of pushing her body to the limits. A good workout is one where she almost dies.
Sarah hates getting in the ocean. She could sit and tan on the beach all day long, but as soon as everyone else wants to go play in the surf she'll wade in tentatively with her arms out vertically so as not to get them wet.
Sarah has the best heart. She thinks of others and genuinely loves the old people we play bingo with. She'd scoop them ice cream all day long if she knew it made their day just a little brighter.
Sarah is learning. She is growing and changing so much right now it is unreal. She is really overcoming a lot of her fears and worries about the future and letting herself go down a path that she never thought she would.
Sarah doesn't flake! This is SO annoying to me and really refreshing to have a friend I can count on...No matter what.
Sarah loves her family. She's one of those girls who has a really healthy relationship with both her mom and dad. She has 4 younger sisters that clearly mean the world to her...Even if they have the occasional conflict.
Sarah is a goof ball. She's most likely to be found jumping like a leprechaun in a parking lot, or laughing with zero volume control.
Sarah is more open about bodily functions that any girl I've ever met....And I think that's funny.
Sarah is a confidant. She can keep a secret. She lets you expose your faults and helps you become better. She is kind and gentle when you need it, but can be strong and pointed when she thinks you're going a bit too far.
Sarah is my friend.
Sarah is a pistol. She is bright and tough and in charge. She knows what she wants and how to get it. She is very committed to her studies...More than anyone I have ever met and that is so impressive to me.
Sarah is also real. She'll tell you what she thinks, but still has the ability to listen to your point. She doesn't sugar coat, hide, or wilt under pressure. She rises to it.
Sarah is tough. I've never met a girl who can run up a mountain like this girl. She actually enjoys the feeling of pushing her body to the limits. A good workout is one where she almost dies.
Sarah hates getting in the ocean. She could sit and tan on the beach all day long, but as soon as everyone else wants to go play in the surf she'll wade in tentatively with her arms out vertically so as not to get them wet.
Sarah has the best heart. She thinks of others and genuinely loves the old people we play bingo with. She'd scoop them ice cream all day long if she knew it made their day just a little brighter.
Sarah is learning. She is growing and changing so much right now it is unreal. She is really overcoming a lot of her fears and worries about the future and letting herself go down a path that she never thought she would.
Sarah doesn't flake! This is SO annoying to me and really refreshing to have a friend I can count on...No matter what.
Sarah loves her family. She's one of those girls who has a really healthy relationship with both her mom and dad. She has 4 younger sisters that clearly mean the world to her...Even if they have the occasional conflict.
Sarah is a goof ball. She's most likely to be found jumping like a leprechaun in a parking lot, or laughing with zero volume control.
Sarah is more open about bodily functions that any girl I've ever met....And I think that's funny.
Sarah is a confidant. She can keep a secret. She lets you expose your faults and helps you become better. She is kind and gentle when you need it, but can be strong and pointed when she thinks you're going a bit too far.
Sarah is my friend.
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Out on a Limb
"Don't be afraid to take a big step. You can't cross a chasm in two small jumps."
-David Lloyd George
Why do people stay in the same career forever? By and large people don't LOVE what they do for a living. It seems to me that people become complacent with their job security and never want to shake things up, even if they're unhappy.
What's so bad about taking a risk?
20 years into his career my dad decided he didn't like what he was doing. He shook things up and decided to start working for himself. It was a lot more demanding and time intensive, but in the end more rewarding.
But it was filled with risk.
Right now it seems to me like I'm standing on a precipice. I could remain on the precipice and sit back, enjoying a fully rewarding life, paid for by my not so riveting employment. I know what the course would be (roughly) and from what I see it really would be great.
If I decide to take the huge leap off the ledge I really don't know what to expect. The unknown looms large and indefinite ahead of me. Who knows where I'll land.
-David Lloyd George
Why do people stay in the same career forever? By and large people don't LOVE what they do for a living. It seems to me that people become complacent with their job security and never want to shake things up, even if they're unhappy.
What's so bad about taking a risk?
20 years into his career my dad decided he didn't like what he was doing. He shook things up and decided to start working for himself. It was a lot more demanding and time intensive, but in the end more rewarding.
But it was filled with risk.
Right now it seems to me like I'm standing on a precipice. I could remain on the precipice and sit back, enjoying a fully rewarding life, paid for by my not so riveting employment. I know what the course would be (roughly) and from what I see it really would be great.
If I decide to take the huge leap off the ledge I really don't know what to expect. The unknown looms large and indefinite ahead of me. Who knows where I'll land.
Despite my best efforts...
Monday was a really hard day for me. I got that stupid rejection, I had to pack up my office to move from my beautiful corner office, I didn't plan anything for FHE, my credit card balance was suspiciously high.
Anyway, after FHE I just broke down and told the ear doctor I just needed to go home, take a bath and go to bed because things were just getting a little out of control.
Tuesday morning he left me a note on my front step telling me how great I am and that I can handle everything. He also left a huge rainbow Frisbee and a CD of all the princess Disney songs. It was SO sweet because he was trying to make me smile. (mission accomplished!)
As a thank you for the support I asked if I could make him dinner. I cooked a fabulous meal, lit a million candles, dimmed the lights and played some instrumental Nat King Cole. It was perfect.
Except.
I placed a bunch of little candles on a plate so that the wax drippings wouldn't get on the counter. I hadn't planned on them burning down so quickly. Half way through our very romantic meal the ear doctor pointed out (with some alarm) the 2 foot long cascading icicles of wax rolling off my counter and onto the carpet.
Great.
I'd tried SO hard to make everything seem effortless and natural and perfect, and, despite my best efforts, I'd messed up.
Oh well, I guess I'll never be a perfect entertainer.
(BTW Luckily I remembered how to get wax out of carpet. Put down a paper towel and iron it up...Works like a charm)
Anyway, after FHE I just broke down and told the ear doctor I just needed to go home, take a bath and go to bed because things were just getting a little out of control.
Tuesday morning he left me a note on my front step telling me how great I am and that I can handle everything. He also left a huge rainbow Frisbee and a CD of all the princess Disney songs. It was SO sweet because he was trying to make me smile. (mission accomplished!)
As a thank you for the support I asked if I could make him dinner. I cooked a fabulous meal, lit a million candles, dimmed the lights and played some instrumental Nat King Cole. It was perfect.
Except.
I placed a bunch of little candles on a plate so that the wax drippings wouldn't get on the counter. I hadn't planned on them burning down so quickly. Half way through our very romantic meal the ear doctor pointed out (with some alarm) the 2 foot long cascading icicles of wax rolling off my counter and onto the carpet.
Great.
I'd tried SO hard to make everything seem effortless and natural and perfect, and, despite my best efforts, I'd messed up.
Oh well, I guess I'll never be a perfect entertainer.
(BTW Luckily I remembered how to get wax out of carpet. Put down a paper towel and iron it up...Works like a charm)
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Why doesn't anyone read anymore?
I was sitting with a group of co-workers and someone mentioned the book he was reading. I was instantly really into the conversation. Discussing books is probably in the top three of most interesting topics to me. I love to know what books really influenced people. I think you can tell a lot about someone from the books they choose to keep on their shelves.
I started asking the group in general if they'd read this book or if they'd read that book. They all just gave me blank stares and actually made me feel a little uncomfortable. Their reactions to me made it seem they felt me to be condescending and uppity. That wasn't my intention at all, but it made me wonder, doesn't anyone read anymore?
"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them." -Mark Twain
I started asking the group in general if they'd read this book or if they'd read that book. They all just gave me blank stares and actually made me feel a little uncomfortable. Their reactions to me made it seem they felt me to be condescending and uppity. That wasn't my intention at all, but it made me wonder, doesn't anyone read anymore?
"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them." -Mark Twain
Monday, February 21, 2005
Things I learned from my mom
Both Greek Tragedy and Girl from Florida inspired me this morning so....
1. Never come to a dinner party empty handed
2. When helping someone set up for a party, don't offer opinion unless it is asked for.
3. Always send a thankyou card that is well written and heartfelt. Always include details.
4. The best thing you can do in the kitchen is dance.
5. Love old musicals and old black and white movies.
6. It's important to be nice to everyone, even if you have a really clever insult.
7. Having Christmas decorations is necessary.
8. Always keep your girlfriends close.
9. Don't ever think you can't do something just because you are a girl.
10. How to have an excellent job interview.
11. Always ask a question at the end of an interview when they ask if you have any.
12. The best places for 10 black olives are the end of each finger.
13. Always edit your papers more than once.
14. Be wary of credit cards.
15. Having the right outfit can make all the difference.
16. Wearing pastel colors makes me look sick.
17. Love to read.
18. Be nice to your sister.
19. NEVER forget the mashed potatoes.
20. If you mess up on turkey soup once and let the carcass sit too long resulting in little floating bones, you will never live down the appellation "bone soup."
21. I am pretty.
22. And funny.
23. Don't take your purse to the mall and leave it in the car. That's just what thieves look for.
24. Be true to yourself and your values.
25. Have a sense of humor.
26. Desserts with some kind of alcohol in them usually taste pretty darn good.
27. If you've made plans of some kind, you must follow through. Flaking is not an option.
28. Its just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor man.
29. If it's ugly, cover it up.
30. Treat your best friend like your sister...Even tell you kids to call her their aunt.
31. Be thankful your life is so much easier.
32. Always paint the walls...White is SO boring.
33. Pictures should be hung at eye level or a little lower. Never higher.
34. Learn how to sew, even if the only thing you can make is a kid's Halloween costume.
35. Only rip a tiny hole in the Hot Tamales box so that you eat them slow enough to avoid getting sick.
36. Be patient with your husband.
37. Keep a clean house.
38. Everyone is different, and that is great.
39. Give your girls dolls as presents, but also telescopes, microscopes, and science kits.
40. If you're sick, eat sprite and saltines.
41. Always clean the mascara off your face every night.
42. If someone compliments an outfit, wear it often.
43. Having a lot of belts is a good thing.
44. How to tie a quilt.
45. Keep in touch with my grandmas.
46. How to tell a good joke. Timing is everything.
47. You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your friend's nose.
48. Learn to be a good listener.
49. Laugh whenever you can.
50. Don't swear....Unless you are REALLY pissed.
51. Be real.
52. Be ambitious.
53. Don't judge.
54. Forgive and forget.
55. Give people the benefit of the doubt whenever you can.
56. You can never have enough work clothes.
57. If you find a pair of pants you like, buy some in every color.
58. When you're selling girl scout cookies don't ask, "do you want to buy some" but rather, "how many boxes do you want?"
59. Going out to eat is heaven.
60. The best time to go to the movies is Saturday afternoon.
61. Never get too old to not enjoy a Disney movie.
62. Listen to books on tape during a road trip.
63. Love flowers, learn their names and platn them in your garden.
64. Wake up and go to bed early.
65. Love your pets.
66. Teach others your beliefs...If they're interested.
67. Find a stylist and always have a cute haircut.
68. Green peppers are nasty.
69. Being competitive is good.
70. Being OVERLY competitive isn't.
71. I can do anything I want.
72. Unconditional love.
73. That you really can do everything.
74. How to have a hero.
75. And a best friend.
1. Never come to a dinner party empty handed
2. When helping someone set up for a party, don't offer opinion unless it is asked for.
3. Always send a thankyou card that is well written and heartfelt. Always include details.
4. The best thing you can do in the kitchen is dance.
5. Love old musicals and old black and white movies.
6. It's important to be nice to everyone, even if you have a really clever insult.
7. Having Christmas decorations is necessary.
8. Always keep your girlfriends close.
9. Don't ever think you can't do something just because you are a girl.
10. How to have an excellent job interview.
11. Always ask a question at the end of an interview when they ask if you have any.
12. The best places for 10 black olives are the end of each finger.
13. Always edit your papers more than once.
14. Be wary of credit cards.
15. Having the right outfit can make all the difference.
16. Wearing pastel colors makes me look sick.
17. Love to read.
18. Be nice to your sister.
19. NEVER forget the mashed potatoes.
20. If you mess up on turkey soup once and let the carcass sit too long resulting in little floating bones, you will never live down the appellation "bone soup."
21. I am pretty.
22. And funny.
23. Don't take your purse to the mall and leave it in the car. That's just what thieves look for.
24. Be true to yourself and your values.
25. Have a sense of humor.
26. Desserts with some kind of alcohol in them usually taste pretty darn good.
27. If you've made plans of some kind, you must follow through. Flaking is not an option.
28. Its just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as a poor man.
29. If it's ugly, cover it up.
30. Treat your best friend like your sister...Even tell you kids to call her their aunt.
31. Be thankful your life is so much easier.
32. Always paint the walls...White is SO boring.
33. Pictures should be hung at eye level or a little lower. Never higher.
34. Learn how to sew, even if the only thing you can make is a kid's Halloween costume.
35. Only rip a tiny hole in the Hot Tamales box so that you eat them slow enough to avoid getting sick.
36. Be patient with your husband.
37. Keep a clean house.
38. Everyone is different, and that is great.
39. Give your girls dolls as presents, but also telescopes, microscopes, and science kits.
40. If you're sick, eat sprite and saltines.
41. Always clean the mascara off your face every night.
42. If someone compliments an outfit, wear it often.
43. Having a lot of belts is a good thing.
44. How to tie a quilt.
45. Keep in touch with my grandmas.
46. How to tell a good joke. Timing is everything.
47. You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your friend's nose.
48. Learn to be a good listener.
49. Laugh whenever you can.
50. Don't swear....Unless you are REALLY pissed.
51. Be real.
52. Be ambitious.
53. Don't judge.
54. Forgive and forget.
55. Give people the benefit of the doubt whenever you can.
56. You can never have enough work clothes.
57. If you find a pair of pants you like, buy some in every color.
58. When you're selling girl scout cookies don't ask, "do you want to buy some" but rather, "how many boxes do you want?"
59. Going out to eat is heaven.
60. The best time to go to the movies is Saturday afternoon.
61. Never get too old to not enjoy a Disney movie.
62. Listen to books on tape during a road trip.
63. Love flowers, learn their names and platn them in your garden.
64. Wake up and go to bed early.
65. Love your pets.
66. Teach others your beliefs...If they're interested.
67. Find a stylist and always have a cute haircut.
68. Green peppers are nasty.
69. Being competitive is good.
70. Being OVERLY competitive isn't.
71. I can do anything I want.
72. Unconditional love.
73. That you really can do everything.
74. How to have a hero.
75. And a best friend.
Stupid F-ing Rejection
My overconfident self image was just deflated.
Completely crushed. Flat. Annihilated. Decimated. Pulverized into a million little flecks of gray and jagged dust.
I just got a letter from the Dean of Admissions at Princeton and they don't want me.
They sent me a really nice, if a bit formulatic, mass email to inform me that somehow I haven't managed to stack up to their standards. They couldn't even send me a real letter to let me know that I'm not smart enough for them. They couldn't even send me a real email address to respond to to find out exactly what area I was lacking in. Ugh.
Good thing I didn't want to go there anyway.
They only have one building for their whole college of engineering, each wing being for the different departments.
Why would I want to go to their sub-par tiny little pretentious university anyway.
They suck.
Completely crushed. Flat. Annihilated. Decimated. Pulverized into a million little flecks of gray and jagged dust.
I just got a letter from the Dean of Admissions at Princeton and they don't want me.
They sent me a really nice, if a bit formulatic, mass email to inform me that somehow I haven't managed to stack up to their standards. They couldn't even send me a real letter to let me know that I'm not smart enough for them. They couldn't even send me a real email address to respond to to find out exactly what area I was lacking in. Ugh.
Good thing I didn't want to go there anyway.
They only have one building for their whole college of engineering, each wing being for the different departments.
Why would I want to go to their sub-par tiny little pretentious university anyway.
They suck.
Thursday, February 17, 2005
Bon Voyage buddies
I'm off to Pennsylvania tomorrow morning for my first taste of East Coast livin. I'll be visiting at Penn State until Sunday afternoon, checking out their program, hanging out with Britt, and just having a pretty pleasant time. Later!
Grad School Update
I received another offer today, so that makes my 50% done. I've heard from 3, not heard from 3. The bummer is that I've heard from the 3 that I was pretty sure I'd be accepted to. I hate the waiting. It's so hard.
The fine educational establishment of Colorado University at Boulder has offered me $1.5K a month salary to dedicate my time and efforts to furthering the research at their institution. This is the lowest offer for me (money-wise) but comes with a bunch of really attractive perks.
Pros of CU over every other school:
1) I don't have to move across the country. I can stay where I'm at, have my same friends, and not need to leave good ole Boulder.
2) I can probably work part time at my job here, thus staying an employee, making some money on the side, and keeping the door open for after I'm done with school.
3) I can ski again next winter. And not fall and bust up my thumb next time.
4) The ear doctor is here and I wouldn't have to worry about that in the mix of everything else.
5) It's closer to my family than anywhere else...Except maybe Stanford, I don't know about that.
6) I wouldn't get a snobby East Coast attitude, or strange Texas pride. ;)
The fine educational establishment of Colorado University at Boulder has offered me $1.5K a month salary to dedicate my time and efforts to furthering the research at their institution. This is the lowest offer for me (money-wise) but comes with a bunch of really attractive perks.
Pros of CU over every other school:
1) I don't have to move across the country. I can stay where I'm at, have my same friends, and not need to leave good ole Boulder.
2) I can probably work part time at my job here, thus staying an employee, making some money on the side, and keeping the door open for after I'm done with school.
3) I can ski again next winter. And not fall and bust up my thumb next time.
4) The ear doctor is here and I wouldn't have to worry about that in the mix of everything else.
5) It's closer to my family than anywhere else...Except maybe Stanford, I don't know about that.
6) I wouldn't get a snobby East Coast attitude, or strange Texas pride. ;)
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
Something fun
So I hardly EVER post links to things here because I think that is really distracting, but Colin found this thing this afternoon and I've been playing with it constantly. Just thought I'd share for all you guys.
Baby Names
Baby Names
Help!
Does anyone have any ideas how to change the color of my sidebar at the bottom? I don't know why it didn't change with the rest of the sidebar background. I can't figure it out.
Is lying always bad?
I read something interesting on Bryan's blog today. He and Derek were tossing around this idea and I thought I'd throw in my two cents.
Situation 1:
You tell a lie and hurt someone in the process. This could be by gossipping, backbiting, or just plain old competition. I'm sure everyone would agree that this is bad.
Situation 2:
You tell a lie to get ahead in some way. You get personal gain, and no one is hurt in the process. As an example of this one I'll share a story about one of my co-workers. Sometimes when I'd be kickin it in his office talking, one of his superiors would walk in and ask him if he'd started writing a report/doing and analysis/checking with another team member. Almost everytime he'd answer in the affirmative, making him look like a really good employee. I was always so impressed by how on top of everything he seemed to be, and once complimented him on this after his boss had left. He turned to me and laughed it off saying he hadn't even started and wouldn't do so for a week or two. He looked good to his boss, but in my eyes I couldn't trust the guy at all, or anything he said to me. This to me is bad...this lie means you have no integrity and your word means nothing.
So now the question is what if you lie, gain from it, don't hurt anyone in the process and no one finds out? Well, I guess this boils down to a question of conscience. And a question of nature vs nurture. I'll let you stew on that one.
Situation 3:
You tell a lie to spare someone's feelings. This is gray area for me. This is a situation where the "end justifies the means" but makes me wonder...does it really? Sure, you've made someone feel better, but isn't thats a false sense of security you've instilled? It isn't reality and it isn't how you really feel. If we are to be guided by the strict rules of complete honesty...where even omission, misdirection, and half truths are considered to be lying shouldn't we tell it how it really is? Does sugar coating things just end up making things worse when the outer shell wears away and people are shocked to find the sour core of truth?
Situation 4:
You tell a lie because you don't like the truth. This is the one that I've fallen into the most. I don't want people to know my faults. I don't want them to see my short comings, failures or frailties, so I'll tell a half truth to present a slightly different impression of myself. This probably isn't the best, because it isn't the truth, but is it really bad?
Situation 1:
You tell a lie and hurt someone in the process. This could be by gossipping, backbiting, or just plain old competition. I'm sure everyone would agree that this is bad.
Situation 2:
You tell a lie to get ahead in some way. You get personal gain, and no one is hurt in the process. As an example of this one I'll share a story about one of my co-workers. Sometimes when I'd be kickin it in his office talking, one of his superiors would walk in and ask him if he'd started writing a report/doing and analysis/checking with another team member. Almost everytime he'd answer in the affirmative, making him look like a really good employee. I was always so impressed by how on top of everything he seemed to be, and once complimented him on this after his boss had left. He turned to me and laughed it off saying he hadn't even started and wouldn't do so for a week or two. He looked good to his boss, but in my eyes I couldn't trust the guy at all, or anything he said to me. This to me is bad...this lie means you have no integrity and your word means nothing.
So now the question is what if you lie, gain from it, don't hurt anyone in the process and no one finds out? Well, I guess this boils down to a question of conscience. And a question of nature vs nurture. I'll let you stew on that one.
Situation 3:
You tell a lie to spare someone's feelings. This is gray area for me. This is a situation where the "end justifies the means" but makes me wonder...does it really? Sure, you've made someone feel better, but isn't thats a false sense of security you've instilled? It isn't reality and it isn't how you really feel. If we are to be guided by the strict rules of complete honesty...where even omission, misdirection, and half truths are considered to be lying shouldn't we tell it how it really is? Does sugar coating things just end up making things worse when the outer shell wears away and people are shocked to find the sour core of truth?
Situation 4:
You tell a lie because you don't like the truth. This is the one that I've fallen into the most. I don't want people to know my faults. I don't want them to see my short comings, failures or frailties, so I'll tell a half truth to present a slightly different impression of myself. This probably isn't the best, because it isn't the truth, but is it really bad?
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
I was secretly hoping someone would ask me to do this...
1. Total amount of music files on your computer:
1,003. Because I can't download anything off the internet, these are only from loading my CD collection onto my work computer.
2. The last CD you bought was:
"Careless Love" by Madeline Peryoux. If you like old school jazz, you'll love her. She reminds me of Ella Fitzgerald. Amazing.
3. What is the song you last listened to before reading this message?
"The World at Large" by Modest Mouse. I'm not really into the band, but a cool co-worker said he liked the song, so I gave it a whirl.
4. Write down 5 songs that you often listen to or that mean a lot to you:
"Pennies from Heaven" by Billie Holiday. This song reminds me to have a positive outlook. When something bad happens, there is probably something good that goes along with it. There's always a silver lining. (Wow, that just made me sound like the biggest Polyanna ever)
"Don't let me by lonely tonight" by James Taylor. This song is depressing, and a little unhealthy, but everyone gets down at times. When I was my loneliest and saddest, this song helped me wallow in my broken heart. It helped me because it expressed exactly how I felt. It was cathartic.
"That's what friends are for" by Dionne Warwick. I know, I know, you are all thinking I am a loser right now. When I moved from Seattle to Spokane the summer between 7th and 8th grade I was so upset that I had lost all of my friends. This song came on the radio and I just SOBBED. Since then it has become my secret theme song. Having strong and real friendships in my life is VITAL and I always strive to be a great friend.
"64" by the Beatles. This is my family song. Whenever we'd drive somewhere we'd always end up singing it together in the car. It reminds me of my dad...The best man alive.
"Get it on tonight" by Montell Jordan. I love to dance and this one has the best beat. It makes me want to shake my skinny, flat, white booty like the inner ghetto superstar that I am.
5. Who are you going to pass this stick to? (3 persons) and why?
I want Anth to do this because she is a blogging slacker, with great taste in music. Plus, I want to know what that Robbie Williams song was called that we used to dance around the house to.
I also want The Magster to take it because I'm putting together the music for her wedding reception and I want to make sure I get her favorites on there.
Lastly, I want Britt to do this because she's a great blogger and I really don't know anything about her taste in music.
1,003. Because I can't download anything off the internet, these are only from loading my CD collection onto my work computer.
2. The last CD you bought was:
"Careless Love" by Madeline Peryoux. If you like old school jazz, you'll love her. She reminds me of Ella Fitzgerald. Amazing.
3. What is the song you last listened to before reading this message?
"The World at Large" by Modest Mouse. I'm not really into the band, but a cool co-worker said he liked the song, so I gave it a whirl.
4. Write down 5 songs that you often listen to or that mean a lot to you:
"Pennies from Heaven" by Billie Holiday. This song reminds me to have a positive outlook. When something bad happens, there is probably something good that goes along with it. There's always a silver lining. (Wow, that just made me sound like the biggest Polyanna ever)
"Don't let me by lonely tonight" by James Taylor. This song is depressing, and a little unhealthy, but everyone gets down at times. When I was my loneliest and saddest, this song helped me wallow in my broken heart. It helped me because it expressed exactly how I felt. It was cathartic.
"That's what friends are for" by Dionne Warwick. I know, I know, you are all thinking I am a loser right now. When I moved from Seattle to Spokane the summer between 7th and 8th grade I was so upset that I had lost all of my friends. This song came on the radio and I just SOBBED. Since then it has become my secret theme song. Having strong and real friendships in my life is VITAL and I always strive to be a great friend.
"64" by the Beatles. This is my family song. Whenever we'd drive somewhere we'd always end up singing it together in the car. It reminds me of my dad...The best man alive.
"Get it on tonight" by Montell Jordan. I love to dance and this one has the best beat. It makes me want to shake my skinny, flat, white booty like the inner ghetto superstar that I am.
5. Who are you going to pass this stick to? (3 persons) and why?
I want Anth to do this because she is a blogging slacker, with great taste in music. Plus, I want to know what that Robbie Williams song was called that we used to dance around the house to.
I also want The Magster to take it because I'm putting together the music for her wedding reception and I want to make sure I get her favorites on there.
Lastly, I want Britt to do this because she's a great blogger and I really don't know anything about her taste in music.
Mystery Solved!
One of my favorite candies has always been those little sugar buttons that are stuck on a long strip of paper. My sister and I would always get them when we went to the candy store, and finish eating them by the time we were home.
The only crappy thing about these candies is that you eat almost as much paper as candy.
Well, my friends, I have solved that problem.
If you lick the back of the paper (the opposite side of the buttons) and let it sit for a minute on your desk, your saliva will loosen the bottom layer of candy from the paper and you can easily scoop them off.
What a glorious realization!
The only crappy thing about these candies is that you eat almost as much paper as candy.
Well, my friends, I have solved that problem.
If you lick the back of the paper (the opposite side of the buttons) and let it sit for a minute on your desk, your saliva will loosen the bottom layer of candy from the paper and you can easily scoop them off.
What a glorious realization!
Monday, February 14, 2005
Happy Valentines Day
I want to wish everyone a happy valentines day today...Even if you don't have someone to share it with...Even if you're special "sweetie" is miles and miles away. Valentines day is still cool because it is the one year we dedicate to caring about someone else.
I've always received a gift for Valentines. My parents really like the holiday, and my dad always gets my sister and I something special, just from him. Other than family gifts, and little elementary school cards there have been three Valentineses when I've received a gift from someone special.
The first was 3 years ago from Derek. We hadn't begun dating yet, so I was shocked to find a Krispy Kreme box on my front door step Junior year. At that time I was really going through a doughnut phase and was thrilled. As I bent over to pick it up, I had a feeling there was foul play going on. Instead of the drippingly sweet odor that should have been emanating from the rectangular, green stripped confection box there was a pungent STANK.
I opened the box and saw it was full of garbage. I was a little confused until I remembered telling Derek about a prank I had pulled the year before by filling a Krispy Kreme box with rocks and leaving it for a friend to find. I immediately knew it was from him and a huge smile spread across my face.
I dumped out the trash, and found a little awkwardly cut red heart with a few simple lines written on it. It said, "Your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth." That was a line from a Jewel the song that he always had me play for him on the guitar. Under the heart there was a treasure map showing me where an actual box of doughnuts was. I ran out and found the real box, sat in the grass in my front yard and devoured three on the spot.
My second "real" Valentines was last year. With Eric.
He had to work until midnight on the actual Valentines, so we decided to celebrate the night before. All of our friends had gone on a camping trip down to Durango, so we were the only two left in town.
He had my roommate open the house and he left a beautiful bouquet of stargazer lilies and roses in my bedroom. When I came home I was floored and called him right away. He came over to pick me up for our date and gave me a gift. It was a white leather Nixon watch that I still wear daily. We went out to dinner and came home. The next morning we went to IHOP and he ate a million of the bottomless pancakes. After IHOP we were walking across the parking lot to Costco (I was going to buy my roommates flowers). As we were walking I leaned in close to him and, completely without thinking, I muttered, "you smell just like Derek."
Talk about the WRONG thing to tell your new boyfriend that is an INSANELY jealous person. I ruined that Valentines day.
This is my third Valentines day and I am so thrilled to be sharing it with the ear doctor. Friday night he took me to the symphony and out to a fancy dinner at the Denver chop house. Today he had my favorite flowers delivered to me at work. It means SO much to me that he does things that he knows I love. He's the best.
I've always received a gift for Valentines. My parents really like the holiday, and my dad always gets my sister and I something special, just from him. Other than family gifts, and little elementary school cards there have been three Valentineses when I've received a gift from someone special.
The first was 3 years ago from Derek. We hadn't begun dating yet, so I was shocked to find a Krispy Kreme box on my front door step Junior year. At that time I was really going through a doughnut phase and was thrilled. As I bent over to pick it up, I had a feeling there was foul play going on. Instead of the drippingly sweet odor that should have been emanating from the rectangular, green stripped confection box there was a pungent STANK.
I opened the box and saw it was full of garbage. I was a little confused until I remembered telling Derek about a prank I had pulled the year before by filling a Krispy Kreme box with rocks and leaving it for a friend to find. I immediately knew it was from him and a huge smile spread across my face.
I dumped out the trash, and found a little awkwardly cut red heart with a few simple lines written on it. It said, "Your hands are in my hair, but my heart is in your teeth." That was a line from a Jewel the song that he always had me play for him on the guitar. Under the heart there was a treasure map showing me where an actual box of doughnuts was. I ran out and found the real box, sat in the grass in my front yard and devoured three on the spot.
My second "real" Valentines was last year. With Eric.
He had to work until midnight on the actual Valentines, so we decided to celebrate the night before. All of our friends had gone on a camping trip down to Durango, so we were the only two left in town.
He had my roommate open the house and he left a beautiful bouquet of stargazer lilies and roses in my bedroom. When I came home I was floored and called him right away. He came over to pick me up for our date and gave me a gift. It was a white leather Nixon watch that I still wear daily. We went out to dinner and came home. The next morning we went to IHOP and he ate a million of the bottomless pancakes. After IHOP we were walking across the parking lot to Costco (I was going to buy my roommates flowers). As we were walking I leaned in close to him and, completely without thinking, I muttered, "you smell just like Derek."
Talk about the WRONG thing to tell your new boyfriend that is an INSANELY jealous person. I ruined that Valentines day.
This is my third Valentines day and I am so thrilled to be sharing it with the ear doctor. Friday night he took me to the symphony and out to a fancy dinner at the Denver chop house. Today he had my favorite flowers delivered to me at work. It means SO much to me that he does things that he knows I love. He's the best.
Thursday, February 10, 2005
Go Longhorns!
I just got off the phone with a professor from UT Austin and the convo was GREAT! He was funny and nice, which is rare in engineering. He has research that, while doesn't sound riveting at first, might actually be pretty cool. He also said I wouldn't have to be a TA, he'd give me an $8K fellowship plus a $1.5K assistantship per semester which means I wouldn't have to sell my car. Also he said Austin only has 60 cloudy days a year. Plus, they have a great football team, so games would be AWESOME. Plus I arranged it so that I can be down there on a visit and go to my friend's wedding. All in all I am a really big fan of UT right now.
Wednesday, February 09, 2005
So...
I had some extra time at work and found this blog.
It had a long list entitled "How to Love a Girl." It made me think of the ear doctor and I thought I'd share my thoughts with you (him). Next to each way suggested on the list of "How to love a girl" I've listed in parenthesis how he fulfills it. So here goes:
Tell her you think she's cool (He does this all the time)
Tell her why you think she's so smart (He's mentioned that he thinks I'm a better student that he is just because of the stories I've told him)
Tell her she's beautiful (Framed Note)
Tell her she's gorgeous (First email he ever sent me)
Smell her hair (Asked me why I smelled so good the other day)
Talk to her in movie theaters (this is all we ever do)
Tell her she's perfect (He doesn't do this, but I like that. It feels real)
Pick her up and pretend you're going to throw her in the river; she'll scream and fight you but secretly, she'll love it. (He play fights with me all the time and I do like it)
Hold her hand and skip (In public, at the mall)
Hold her hand and run (I don't like to run)
Just hold her hand (always does)
Pick flowers from other people's gardens and give them to her (We haven't been dating when the flowers are in bloom yet)
Tell her she looks pretty (everytime I dress up to go out)
Let her pay for stuff if she wants to but pay most of the time (he is PERFECT at this)
Introduce her to your friends as "that girl you talk about ALL the time." (Hasn't done this)
Sit in the park and talk to her (It's been too cold)
Take her to the library, and playgrounds, and train stations (I don't think there is a train station around)
Tell her dirty jokes (he's too good for that)
Tell her stupid jokes (check)
Write poems about her (I don't think he's much of a creative writer...although I could be wrong)
Just walk around with her (always)
Throw pebbles at her window at night (snowballs)
When she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her (I think I'd poke him in the eye if he did this)
Take her to shows of bands she's never heard of (not yet)
Hold her hand when she's sleeping (Yep)
Let her fall asleep in your arms (more than he'd like to)
Call her (we're all about text messaging)
Call her back if she calls you (always)
Sing to her, no matter how bad you are (Does car singing count?)
Carve your names into a tree (This pisses me off so I'd never want him to do it)
Get her mad, then kiss her (Again, I don't know how well that would go over)
Tell her she's The Best Thing That Has Ever Happened To You (almost a direct quote)
Refer to her as "love" often (cheesy...he calls me beautiful sometimes)
Give her piggy-back rides (or bull rides)
Whenever she wants to kiss you or hug you - when you guys are standing up - pick her up so she can (I'm tall enough, so he doesn't have to)
Give her space if she needs it (he's working on it)
Push her on swings (he would if there were any swings around)
Make up pet names for her, but cool ones, not sappy ones (hasn't done this yet but it's only a matter of time)
Tell her she's funny. And weird. And silly. (too often to count)
Lend her your cds (He has an ipod and I don't so this doesn't really work...but I bet he would.)
Use nerdy pick-up lines on her (He's all about being dorky)
ENCOURAGE HER AND HER DREAMS (Does an amazing job of supporting me with my grad school apps, even though he doesn't want me to go)
Hold her until she gets uncomfortable (He's the best at this)
Make sure she knows you love her. No matter what (No doubt in my mind)
When she can't sleep, spoon and tell her a story (I can't ever not sleep)
Read what she writes (He checks this blog daily)
Write letters to her (they're more like notes)
If she asks you to go to a show with her, go, even if it means a 5 hour train trip (I'm sure he'd do this...he'd even give up going camping with the boyz for me)
Watch her fav girly movie with her, as many times as she wants to see it. With her in your lap (Anne of Green Gables anyone?)
Take her to fun shops, and let her take you to some (we haven't been shopping together because I'm poor and shopping without buying anything depresses me)
Try to play guitar, just for her, even if you are horrible (he plays the piano instead)
Listen to all the bands she mentions (Incubus)
Don't tell her that her favorite bands suck (he's never done this)
When she's sad, hang out with her or stay on the phone with her, even if she's not saying anything (check)
Buy her ice cream (He got my favorite when I went out to meet his folks)
Look into her eyes (my favorite)
Slow dance with her, even if the music is fast (we are two dancin fools)
Kiss her in the rain (does the snow count?)
When you fall in love with her, tell her (check)
It had a long list entitled "How to Love a Girl." It made me think of the ear doctor and I thought I'd share my thoughts with you (him). Next to each way suggested on the list of "How to love a girl" I've listed in parenthesis how he fulfills it. So here goes:
Tell her you think she's cool (He does this all the time)
Tell her why you think she's so smart (He's mentioned that he thinks I'm a better student that he is just because of the stories I've told him)
Tell her she's beautiful (Framed Note)
Tell her she's gorgeous (First email he ever sent me)
Smell her hair (Asked me why I smelled so good the other day)
Talk to her in movie theaters (this is all we ever do)
Tell her she's perfect (He doesn't do this, but I like that. It feels real)
Pick her up and pretend you're going to throw her in the river; she'll scream and fight you but secretly, she'll love it. (He play fights with me all the time and I do like it)
Hold her hand and skip (In public, at the mall)
Hold her hand and run (I don't like to run)
Just hold her hand (always does)
Pick flowers from other people's gardens and give them to her (We haven't been dating when the flowers are in bloom yet)
Tell her she looks pretty (everytime I dress up to go out)
Let her pay for stuff if she wants to but pay most of the time (he is PERFECT at this)
Introduce her to your friends as "that girl you talk about ALL the time." (Hasn't done this)
Sit in the park and talk to her (It's been too cold)
Take her to the library, and playgrounds, and train stations (I don't think there is a train station around)
Tell her dirty jokes (he's too good for that)
Tell her stupid jokes (check)
Write poems about her (I don't think he's much of a creative writer...although I could be wrong)
Just walk around with her (always)
Throw pebbles at her window at night (snowballs)
When she starts swearing at you, tell her you love her (I think I'd poke him in the eye if he did this)
Take her to shows of bands she's never heard of (not yet)
Hold her hand when she's sleeping (Yep)
Let her fall asleep in your arms (more than he'd like to)
Call her (we're all about text messaging)
Call her back if she calls you (always)
Sing to her, no matter how bad you are (Does car singing count?)
Carve your names into a tree (This pisses me off so I'd never want him to do it)
Get her mad, then kiss her (Again, I don't know how well that would go over)
Tell her she's The Best Thing That Has Ever Happened To You (almost a direct quote)
Refer to her as "love" often (cheesy...he calls me beautiful sometimes)
Give her piggy-back rides (or bull rides)
Whenever she wants to kiss you or hug you - when you guys are standing up - pick her up so she can (I'm tall enough, so he doesn't have to)
Give her space if she needs it (he's working on it)
Push her on swings (he would if there were any swings around)
Make up pet names for her, but cool ones, not sappy ones (hasn't done this yet but it's only a matter of time)
Tell her she's funny. And weird. And silly. (too often to count)
Lend her your cds (He has an ipod and I don't so this doesn't really work...but I bet he would.)
Use nerdy pick-up lines on her (He's all about being dorky)
ENCOURAGE HER AND HER DREAMS (Does an amazing job of supporting me with my grad school apps, even though he doesn't want me to go)
Hold her until she gets uncomfortable (He's the best at this)
Make sure she knows you love her. No matter what (No doubt in my mind)
When she can't sleep, spoon and tell her a story (I can't ever not sleep)
Read what she writes (He checks this blog daily)
Write letters to her (they're more like notes)
If she asks you to go to a show with her, go, even if it means a 5 hour train trip (I'm sure he'd do this...he'd even give up going camping with the boyz for me)
Watch her fav girly movie with her, as many times as she wants to see it. With her in your lap (Anne of Green Gables anyone?)
Take her to fun shops, and let her take you to some (we haven't been shopping together because I'm poor and shopping without buying anything depresses me)
Try to play guitar, just for her, even if you are horrible (he plays the piano instead)
Listen to all the bands she mentions (Incubus)
Don't tell her that her favorite bands suck (he's never done this)
When she's sad, hang out with her or stay on the phone with her, even if she's not saying anything (check)
Buy her ice cream (He got my favorite when I went out to meet his folks)
Look into her eyes (my favorite)
Slow dance with her, even if the music is fast (we are two dancin fools)
Kiss her in the rain (does the snow count?)
When you fall in love with her, tell her (check)
My ode to Tom Brady
Alright, so some background is needed on this one.
My dad coached football. He has ALWAYS coached football. When we were really little he coached little league and my sister and I went to little league cheerleading. We got a little older and he started coaching semi-pro ball. Football and my dad go hand in hand.
When I watch a game I watch it. I don't go for the show, I go to see the game. Knowing what is going on during a game is important to me. Last year I went to a WSU/CU game and for the first time in my life my dad asked me what I thought about the game, and took my response seriously. I'm not one of those girls who doesn't "get" what's going on...I know the game as well as anyone who hasn't actually played it can.
I think my dad is pretty much perfect, and therefore want to end up with a guy pretty similar. Consequently, one of my requirements for guys I date is an interest in football. He has to be able to talk about the game intelligently. The other thing I really need in a guy is someone who is well read and smart. These two traits don't usually come in the same package, which is why I'm so happy to have found the ear doctor possessed of both.
Back to the subject of this post...Recently the spark of passion has yet again been sparked by the Patriot's QB Tom Brady. Man do I have a crush on that guy! So calm and steady under pressure. Great arm. After the superbowl I heard him talk and he doesn't sound like a complete meathead, so I'm hooked. Tiger Woods, step aside. My sports celebrity crush du jour is none other than the illustrious Mr. Tom Brady.
My dad coached football. He has ALWAYS coached football. When we were really little he coached little league and my sister and I went to little league cheerleading. We got a little older and he started coaching semi-pro ball. Football and my dad go hand in hand.
When I watch a game I watch it. I don't go for the show, I go to see the game. Knowing what is going on during a game is important to me. Last year I went to a WSU/CU game and for the first time in my life my dad asked me what I thought about the game, and took my response seriously. I'm not one of those girls who doesn't "get" what's going on...I know the game as well as anyone who hasn't actually played it can.
I think my dad is pretty much perfect, and therefore want to end up with a guy pretty similar. Consequently, one of my requirements for guys I date is an interest in football. He has to be able to talk about the game intelligently. The other thing I really need in a guy is someone who is well read and smart. These two traits don't usually come in the same package, which is why I'm so happy to have found the ear doctor possessed of both.
Back to the subject of this post...Recently the spark of passion has yet again been sparked by the Patriot's QB Tom Brady. Man do I have a crush on that guy! So calm and steady under pressure. Great arm. After the superbowl I heard him talk and he doesn't sound like a complete meathead, so I'm hooked. Tiger Woods, step aside. My sports celebrity crush du jour is none other than the illustrious Mr. Tom Brady.
Tuesday, February 08, 2005
Ugh
Have intense, eye-splitting, nausea inducing, room spinning, computer screen monitor repelling headache right now. Going home to bed immediately.
Will post something lovely tomorrow.
Will post something lovely tomorrow.
Monday, February 07, 2005
I'm Leary
Usually I'm pretty good at handling change. I can roll with the punches with the best of them. If something doesn't go my way, I'm annoyed, but I can adapt.
Something has recently come to my attention that is testing my malleability.
They've remade Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
This may not seem like a big deal to most people, but it is to me. As a little girl I loved that movie and my appreciation for it has grown since I've matured. Now I am pleasantly creeped out by the slightly deranged gleam in Gene Wilder's eyes. I used to just be scared by the tunnel trip on the "Wonkatania" and now I am left to wonder who thought those images would be alright to show to children.
So now I wonder....Can Johnny Depp really do a good job in the leading roll? Who are they going to get to play the 4 grandparents that all sleep in the same bed? Will they use midgets or CGI effects? Will the integrity of the story be maintained?
Quite the conundrum
Something has recently come to my attention that is testing my malleability.
They've remade Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.
This may not seem like a big deal to most people, but it is to me. As a little girl I loved that movie and my appreciation for it has grown since I've matured. Now I am pleasantly creeped out by the slightly deranged gleam in Gene Wilder's eyes. I used to just be scared by the tunnel trip on the "Wonkatania" and now I am left to wonder who thought those images would be alright to show to children.
So now I wonder....Can Johnny Depp really do a good job in the leading roll? Who are they going to get to play the 4 grandparents that all sleep in the same bed? Will they use midgets or CGI effects? Will the integrity of the story be maintained?
Quite the conundrum
Friday, February 04, 2005
First time Pilot
I left work in euphoria. It was 3 pm, sunny, warm and beautiful...The perfect Colorado day. I peeled out of my work parking lot and made my way out of town. My destination? The Jeffco airport.
I met up with Doug and we went to his hangar. He pulled open the huge sliding metal doors and I was introduced to the machine that would be flying me 14,000 feet above sea level. It was the size of a tuna can.
Honestly, I think it was about as tall as I am.
For a moment I was a little nervous. The previous comment that my mom made about being careful rang through my mind. She warned, "be careful up there. My uncle died in a small plane crash. Call me as soon as you are back on the ground." Jeez, thanks a lot mom.
I pushed my nerves aside and climbed in the cockpit.
Doug gave me a short run down of all the switches and dials and told me to put on the huge headphones. I was an obedient co-pilot and did everything he said. Visions on Maverick and Goose started passing through my mind, and Highway to the Danger Zone running through my ears as I lowered the microphone to my lips.
We taxied to the runway and took off.
It was amazing. Totally different from any other flying I've ever done. I could feel the roll, pitch and yaw of the plane like I never had in a commercial jet.
As we gained altitude we made wide looping circles over the city of Boulder. I could look down and see all the familiar details of town, but looking from above completely changed my perspective. I saw CU campus, my work building, Pearl Street and tried to make out Colin's house.
When we were high enough we flew over Corona Pass.
Oh. my. gosh.
The jagged ridges and rocky precipice shot out at us. The snow-capped majestic hills that have stood for centuries were no obstacles for us as we dipped and whirred past them at over 100 mph. I was awe struck and had no words to describe what I was seeing other than beautiful, which felt so incredibly inadequate.
I took the controls and flew the plane. I made wide turns, left and right, and made the plane climb to the legal limit of a small plane without oxygen.
We flew over Eldora, Winter Park, KeyStone and Breckenridge. Down into an alpine valley that highway 285 runs through. We did "touch and gos" on a little dirt road. We flew down past Pikes Peak. We watched the colors of the light change with sunset and I was amazed by the real "purple mountain majesty" that I saw. After night fell we flew up over Colorado springs and over the city of Denver from the south. There were so many lights I was dumbfounded.
As we prepared to land the plane Doug told me all about how to line up with the runway, how to raise the flaps, how to adjust the locator dial. It was awesome.
The total trip took us 2 hours and we flew 270 miles. If you ever have the chance to go on a trip like this, I highly recommend it.
I met up with Doug and we went to his hangar. He pulled open the huge sliding metal doors and I was introduced to the machine that would be flying me 14,000 feet above sea level. It was the size of a tuna can.
Honestly, I think it was about as tall as I am.
For a moment I was a little nervous. The previous comment that my mom made about being careful rang through my mind. She warned, "be careful up there. My uncle died in a small plane crash. Call me as soon as you are back on the ground." Jeez, thanks a lot mom.
I pushed my nerves aside and climbed in the cockpit.
Doug gave me a short run down of all the switches and dials and told me to put on the huge headphones. I was an obedient co-pilot and did everything he said. Visions on Maverick and Goose started passing through my mind, and Highway to the Danger Zone running through my ears as I lowered the microphone to my lips.
We taxied to the runway and took off.
It was amazing. Totally different from any other flying I've ever done. I could feel the roll, pitch and yaw of the plane like I never had in a commercial jet.
As we gained altitude we made wide looping circles over the city of Boulder. I could look down and see all the familiar details of town, but looking from above completely changed my perspective. I saw CU campus, my work building, Pearl Street and tried to make out Colin's house.
When we were high enough we flew over Corona Pass.
Oh. my. gosh.
The jagged ridges and rocky precipice shot out at us. The snow-capped majestic hills that have stood for centuries were no obstacles for us as we dipped and whirred past them at over 100 mph. I was awe struck and had no words to describe what I was seeing other than beautiful, which felt so incredibly inadequate.
I took the controls and flew the plane. I made wide turns, left and right, and made the plane climb to the legal limit of a small plane without oxygen.
We flew over Eldora, Winter Park, KeyStone and Breckenridge. Down into an alpine valley that highway 285 runs through. We did "touch and gos" on a little dirt road. We flew down past Pikes Peak. We watched the colors of the light change with sunset and I was amazed by the real "purple mountain majesty" that I saw. After night fell we flew up over Colorado springs and over the city of Denver from the south. There were so many lights I was dumbfounded.
As we prepared to land the plane Doug told me all about how to line up with the runway, how to raise the flaps, how to adjust the locator dial. It was awesome.
The total trip took us 2 hours and we flew 270 miles. If you ever have the chance to go on a trip like this, I highly recommend it.
Thursday, February 03, 2005
100 things revisited
I did this a while ago. I read through it and was surprised by things that have already changed. I believe that people are always changing and learning and growing. I'm doing this again so that I can look back in 3 months and again be surprised by how much has changed.
1. I'm beginning to really like the routine of my work.
2. I've weaned myself off Pepsi almost entirely. (I still slip and have one every now and then)
3. I just sprained my UCL (skiiers thumb) and haven't been skiing since Jan 9.
4. This KILLS me.
5. I live alone. I used to be afraid that I would get really lonely if I lived alone, but every day I like it more.
6. I don't use my heat. Too expensive.
7. As a result, I sleep in long underwear and a hat. Everynight it reminds me of "The Night Before Christmas"
8. I miss my old friends from college. A. Lot.
9. I love the friends I've made in Colorado.
10. I'll be sad when I/they leave.
11. Today I'm going flying after work over the mountains.
12. I really like to go out to eat. Especially with the ear doctor.
13. I'm stressed out about my sister's bridesmaid dresses. I don't understand why it is such a big deal.
14. I've always liked impressing people.
15. I want the man I marry to be amazed every day of his life that he ended up with me.
16. I want to be amazed every day of my married life that I am with such an amazing person as my husband.
17. I never want to loose touch with Kathy, Brooke, or Sarah.
18. I check my blog 8 times a day to see if anyone has commented.
19. I once had a mouse for a pet.
20. I named him Gus Gus.
21. My sister killed it.
22. We buried it under a rose bush and called the rose bush Gus Gus.
23. My dad is a huge man and ends his phone calls by saying "Bye Bye" and I think that is SO cute.
24. I'm addicted to Gilmore Girls
25. For the first time in my life I'm not in the middle of a book.
26. I love shopping, but am trying to learn control.
27. I think it is vital to have close girlfriends.
28. I secretly wish I was good at sports.
29. I wish I played my violin more frequently.
30. Playing my violin in front of people scares me and always makes me feel inadequate.
31. I think blogs are good for society.
32. Right now my officemate is listening to a basketball game.
33. I love living in Colorado.
34. I love avocados.
35. Sometimes I crave meat.
36. I have a real problem with over eating. If something is there I'll eat it. This is why I have little to no food in my house.
37. I don't have cable and I miss it.
38. I'm not that political.
39. I'm going to the Madeline Peryoux concert on Saturday and I'm really excited about it.
40. Sometimes I'm afraid I've lost my academic drive and that worries me for grad school.
41. Sometimes I doubt if I should go back to school.
42. I really miss my aunt Sandy.
43. I love photos. Taking them, organizing them, showing them, telling their stories, everything.
44. I want to take a photography class.
45. I want to take a cooking class.
46. I love baking desserts, but I don't like making meals.
47. One of the most important things to me in a relationship is the ability to forgive.
48. Laughter is a close second.
49. I still care about all my exboyfriends.
50. And hope they're happy.
51. I like plain lays and ruffles.
52. I don't like salt and vinegar chips.
53. I like cottage cheese, but not applesauce.
54. I'm always torn between a Twix and Kit Kat
55. I miss my parents a lot.
56. I'm realizing how long this list is.
57. My favorite words are plethora and onomatopoeia.
58. Sometimes I think I'd make a really good high school math or English teacher.
59. I just got invited to a music night/jam session with some co-workers and I'm freaked out.
60. I want my kids to learn to play instruments.
61. I think birthdays are really important and have almost everyone I know's big day logged in my work computer Outlook Calendar.
62. I've never been drunk, high, or smoked a cigarette.
63. Sometimes I'm embarrassed to admit I'm such a "Molly."
64. I really want an orange kitten and since I'm moving in the near future, I might get one.
65. My dad is the greatest.
66. I really like lists.
67. I think about my finances constantly.
68. I think being responsible is important and have always been so.
69. Once I lived in the basement of an old house and never did the dishes. It was gross.
70. I just got my fingerprints taken so now that "life of crime" option becomes a whole lot harder.
71. I've never stolen anything.
72. I can't go into the bathroom in the dark. Too scary.
73. I'm so excited for Sarah's wedding and I know it will all work out alright.
74. Feeling like I have direction is very important to me.
75. I'd rather have a steak than a salad.
76. I hate it when Mexican restaurants put that nasty shredded lettuce on my plate. Gross.
77. I love eating peas and carrots straight out of the garden.
78. I love planting flowers, especially petunias with my mom.
79. I love going to the movies in the afternoon.
80. I like the sticks from fun dip better than the powder.
81. I've never had surgery.
82. I worry about my dad's health.
83. I really like to wear green because I always get compliments.
84. Sometimes I struggle with my self image.
85. I love it when the ear doctor says I'm pretty.
86. I like watching movies with the actor's commentary.
87. I want to grow up to be just like my mom.
88. I want to drive a mini cooper.
89. I wish I saw more of Kathy and her little pregnant self while she is going through this.
90. I wish I could go on a trip with Brooke.
91. I love Christmas and can't wait for it to come around again.
92. I wish I got more Christmas cards.
93. I hate networking.
94. I hate talking to people if I don't feel like there is a genuine connection.
95. My work day is almost over.
96. I thought I was going to have a migraine today because my hands were numb when I woke up. Luckily, it was just that I'd slept funny.
97. Sometimes I wish I could lighten up more.
98. I'm crazy about the ear doctor.
99. My little sister is my role model.
100. I wish I had more shoes.
1. I'm beginning to really like the routine of my work.
2. I've weaned myself off Pepsi almost entirely. (I still slip and have one every now and then)
3. I just sprained my UCL (skiiers thumb) and haven't been skiing since Jan 9.
4. This KILLS me.
5. I live alone. I used to be afraid that I would get really lonely if I lived alone, but every day I like it more.
6. I don't use my heat. Too expensive.
7. As a result, I sleep in long underwear and a hat. Everynight it reminds me of "The Night Before Christmas"
8. I miss my old friends from college. A. Lot.
9. I love the friends I've made in Colorado.
10. I'll be sad when I/they leave.
11. Today I'm going flying after work over the mountains.
12. I really like to go out to eat. Especially with the ear doctor.
13. I'm stressed out about my sister's bridesmaid dresses. I don't understand why it is such a big deal.
14. I've always liked impressing people.
15. I want the man I marry to be amazed every day of his life that he ended up with me.
16. I want to be amazed every day of my married life that I am with such an amazing person as my husband.
17. I never want to loose touch with Kathy, Brooke, or Sarah.
18. I check my blog 8 times a day to see if anyone has commented.
19. I once had a mouse for a pet.
20. I named him Gus Gus.
21. My sister killed it.
22. We buried it under a rose bush and called the rose bush Gus Gus.
23. My dad is a huge man and ends his phone calls by saying "Bye Bye" and I think that is SO cute.
24. I'm addicted to Gilmore Girls
25. For the first time in my life I'm not in the middle of a book.
26. I love shopping, but am trying to learn control.
27. I think it is vital to have close girlfriends.
28. I secretly wish I was good at sports.
29. I wish I played my violin more frequently.
30. Playing my violin in front of people scares me and always makes me feel inadequate.
31. I think blogs are good for society.
32. Right now my officemate is listening to a basketball game.
33. I love living in Colorado.
34. I love avocados.
35. Sometimes I crave meat.
36. I have a real problem with over eating. If something is there I'll eat it. This is why I have little to no food in my house.
37. I don't have cable and I miss it.
38. I'm not that political.
39. I'm going to the Madeline Peryoux concert on Saturday and I'm really excited about it.
40. Sometimes I'm afraid I've lost my academic drive and that worries me for grad school.
41. Sometimes I doubt if I should go back to school.
42. I really miss my aunt Sandy.
43. I love photos. Taking them, organizing them, showing them, telling their stories, everything.
44. I want to take a photography class.
45. I want to take a cooking class.
46. I love baking desserts, but I don't like making meals.
47. One of the most important things to me in a relationship is the ability to forgive.
48. Laughter is a close second.
49. I still care about all my exboyfriends.
50. And hope they're happy.
51. I like plain lays and ruffles.
52. I don't like salt and vinegar chips.
53. I like cottage cheese, but not applesauce.
54. I'm always torn between a Twix and Kit Kat
55. I miss my parents a lot.
56. I'm realizing how long this list is.
57. My favorite words are plethora and onomatopoeia.
58. Sometimes I think I'd make a really good high school math or English teacher.
59. I just got invited to a music night/jam session with some co-workers and I'm freaked out.
60. I want my kids to learn to play instruments.
61. I think birthdays are really important and have almost everyone I know's big day logged in my work computer Outlook Calendar.
62. I've never been drunk, high, or smoked a cigarette.
63. Sometimes I'm embarrassed to admit I'm such a "Molly."
64. I really want an orange kitten and since I'm moving in the near future, I might get one.
65. My dad is the greatest.
66. I really like lists.
67. I think about my finances constantly.
68. I think being responsible is important and have always been so.
69. Once I lived in the basement of an old house and never did the dishes. It was gross.
70. I just got my fingerprints taken so now that "life of crime" option becomes a whole lot harder.
71. I've never stolen anything.
72. I can't go into the bathroom in the dark. Too scary.
73. I'm so excited for Sarah's wedding and I know it will all work out alright.
74. Feeling like I have direction is very important to me.
75. I'd rather have a steak than a salad.
76. I hate it when Mexican restaurants put that nasty shredded lettuce on my plate. Gross.
77. I love eating peas and carrots straight out of the garden.
78. I love planting flowers, especially petunias with my mom.
79. I love going to the movies in the afternoon.
80. I like the sticks from fun dip better than the powder.
81. I've never had surgery.
82. I worry about my dad's health.
83. I really like to wear green because I always get compliments.
84. Sometimes I struggle with my self image.
85. I love it when the ear doctor says I'm pretty.
86. I like watching movies with the actor's commentary.
87. I want to grow up to be just like my mom.
88. I want to drive a mini cooper.
89. I wish I saw more of Kathy and her little pregnant self while she is going through this.
90. I wish I could go on a trip with Brooke.
91. I love Christmas and can't wait for it to come around again.
92. I wish I got more Christmas cards.
93. I hate networking.
94. I hate talking to people if I don't feel like there is a genuine connection.
95. My work day is almost over.
96. I thought I was going to have a migraine today because my hands were numb when I woke up. Luckily, it was just that I'd slept funny.
97. Sometimes I wish I could lighten up more.
98. I'm crazy about the ear doctor.
99. My little sister is my role model.
100. I wish I had more shoes.
Question
What do they call it when all the stars align and everything in your life seems to be going perfectly? When it's sunny and clear out and you just can't help but have that "I'm a total sucker" grin on your face all day long? Whatever it is, that's what I've got.
I just have this perfect sense of calm and content right now for everything and everyone. These days are rare and precious and I just wanted to document it.
I just have this perfect sense of calm and content right now for everything and everyone. These days are rare and precious and I just wanted to document it.
Wednesday, February 02, 2005
How are you today?
I came in late to work today.
Luckily, my officemate was even later.
The first words out of my mouth were, "how are you today?"
I don't know why I asked it. It was blatantly obvious that he wasn't well..in fact I was pretty sure I knew exactly how he was judging from the fact that he was late, in a hurry, and slammed his bag on the floor.
His response, "Fine, how about you?"
"Fine" I replied without even turning my head to look at him.
It got me thinking about why on earth we ask each other this every day, at every meeting, and in almost every situation. It is so over used and banal. If someone ever actually gave me a real response to that question I think I'd be floored.
What if, in response to my officemate, I'd told the truth? It would have gone a little something like this:
"Well, (officemate), I'm feeling a little weirded out by the strange dream that I had just before waking up. I feel a little out of control because I no longer have a roommate and I'm paying way too much money to live alone in a 3 bedroom condo. I feel completely secure in my relationship with the ear doctor. I feel nervous about the huge choices I'm going to have to make in the next couple of months regarding grad school. I feel rejuvenated about my calling as FHE planner because I have some new and awesome people to help me out. I feel mischievous thinking back about what the ear doctor and I filled our evening with last night."
He would have looked at me and said, "oh"
Luckily, my officemate was even later.
The first words out of my mouth were, "how are you today?"
I don't know why I asked it. It was blatantly obvious that he wasn't well..in fact I was pretty sure I knew exactly how he was judging from the fact that he was late, in a hurry, and slammed his bag on the floor.
His response, "Fine, how about you?"
"Fine" I replied without even turning my head to look at him.
It got me thinking about why on earth we ask each other this every day, at every meeting, and in almost every situation. It is so over used and banal. If someone ever actually gave me a real response to that question I think I'd be floored.
What if, in response to my officemate, I'd told the truth? It would have gone a little something like this:
"Well, (officemate), I'm feeling a little weirded out by the strange dream that I had just before waking up. I feel a little out of control because I no longer have a roommate and I'm paying way too much money to live alone in a 3 bedroom condo. I feel completely secure in my relationship with the ear doctor. I feel nervous about the huge choices I'm going to have to make in the next couple of months regarding grad school. I feel rejuvenated about my calling as FHE planner because I have some new and awesome people to help me out. I feel mischievous thinking back about what the ear doctor and I filled our evening with last night."
He would have looked at me and said, "oh"
Tuesday, February 01, 2005
Lost
Dating is a funny thing. You spend 3-4 months completely wrapped up in someone else. You investigate their inner workings. You find out everything you can about them from their favorite candy bar to the way they were affected by their parent's diagnosed cancer. You are granted access to the secret parts of their heart where hardly anyone has ever been before. They trust you with everything and you are held accountable for that responsibility.
conversely, you open your soul up to them.
My first real love didn't happen until I was a junior in college. He was amazing. He taught me how to let go of my insecurities. He showed me the benefits of genuinely caring for everyone. He demonstrated through his guileless actions that being nice is really the most important of qualities. I liked who I was around him. I told him things I'd never told anyone before. I loved him. He also broke my heart.
The second person I loved took me by complete surprised. He was young and confused. I totally opened up my soft underbelly to him and, for a time, he was amazing. He was there to help me through my aunt's death. He was there to show me to lighten up and loosen my perpetual serious/planner side. He broke my heart, but ended up teaching me a lot more about myself than I ever thought I could learn.
I find one common thing between these two relationships very interesting.
The relationship I have with them now. I know them both so well, yet I hardly ever have contact with either. I'm friendly with both, but there is no deep connection anymore. It just seems to me so strange to have so much history with someone...To know all their secrets...To have them know all my secrets and to interact like casual acquaintances. It boggles my mind.
conversely, you open your soul up to them.
My first real love didn't happen until I was a junior in college. He was amazing. He taught me how to let go of my insecurities. He showed me the benefits of genuinely caring for everyone. He demonstrated through his guileless actions that being nice is really the most important of qualities. I liked who I was around him. I told him things I'd never told anyone before. I loved him. He also broke my heart.
The second person I loved took me by complete surprised. He was young and confused. I totally opened up my soft underbelly to him and, for a time, he was amazing. He was there to help me through my aunt's death. He was there to show me to lighten up and loosen my perpetual serious/planner side. He broke my heart, but ended up teaching me a lot more about myself than I ever thought I could learn.
I find one common thing between these two relationships very interesting.
The relationship I have with them now. I know them both so well, yet I hardly ever have contact with either. I'm friendly with both, but there is no deep connection anymore. It just seems to me so strange to have so much history with someone...To know all their secrets...To have them know all my secrets and to interact like casual acquaintances. It boggles my mind.
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