Monday, June 13, 2005

I am an uber-nerd

Last Thanksgiving I flew to Utah to be with my family. On the way back to Denver I had quite a few more bags than I left with, and was short on space. I was wearing my huge navy blue pea coat and realize that I didn't want that bulky mass of wool around me for the flight. I stuffed it into a soft sided bag. I also decided that I was going to sleep the whole flight, so I wouldn't need my glasses. In one tragic, rash, thoughtless, swoop I bundled my glasses in my coat and shoved it into my soft bag, checked it at the counter and left to undergo the full body cavity inspection at airport security.

At Denver I waited patiently at the baggage turnstile. As my bag dropped harshly down onto the moving conveyor belt I felt a strange foreboding start to rumble in the pit of my stomach. I unzipped the bag, and there, on top, was a nice little flyer from the TSA informing me that my bag had been randomly selected to be opened, have the contents spilled out and had an employee perform the Mexican hat dance on my belongings.

Long story short....They broke my glasses right down the middle.

Fast forward to this morning. I woke up and my eyes were completely covered over by what I refer to as "eye boogers." After flushing my eyes with warm water to clear them away I looked up at myself in the mirror. Now I've never been stoned before, but this morning was my chance to see how I would look if I ever decided to indulge myself in some mary jane. Believe was not pretty.

I decided that I absolutely could not wear my contacts today, but that left me in a pickle.

No contacts, broken glasses, 20 minute drive into work.....what a dilemma.

Suddenly I had an inspiration.

I raced down to the kitchen and picked up the tape. I proceeded to huge a huge strip of tape to hold my glasses together. Yes, I was sporting this look into work today:

The really nerdy part about this story is that I was laughing at myself the entire ride into work.

Pretty dorky if you ask me.


Anonymous said...

Maybe you would have felt better if you had smoked the dubbie. Then you wouldn't feel so bad about the glasses. A girlfriend once stepped on my glasses by accident. I had the strangest feeling of belittlement. I don't envy you sans spectacles. Are they going to pay for them?

Katie said...

No, that's what the flyer they left in my bag said. I'm SOL.

Anonymous said...

That sucks. Maybe by tomorrow your eyes will be better.


Maggie said...

Were the eye boogers because of allergies? Mine have been horrendous. I don't even try to use my contacts. Don't worry I just go sans everything and squint while I'm driving. Pretty safe if you ask me!