Dear Rockies,

Saturday night I braved the traffic down the Denver with a bunch of friends to watch you play a game against the Dodgers. But, I have to be honest with you because that is what real friends do, I've never really liked baseball. The game is slower than basketball, usually doesn't have the eye candy like football or soccer, and for some reason I always end up with my ankles splashed by someone else's warm beer.

Nevertheless, this outing was my idea and my sacrifice because the ear doctor loves the Dodgers. I thought, because your reputation for less than stellar baseball prowess, that the ear doctor would have a great time seeing his team demolish the competition.

Imagine my surprise when, after hiking the equivalent of Mt. Everest and finding found our seats in the very top of the stadium, in the first inning you had already pulled ahead of your adversaries!

Additionally, I had a personal sports-related first. In between my first course of foot-long hotdog and giant diet coke and second course of twisted cinnamon sugar covered pretzel I saw one of the players break the bat! And, even though my friend Super-Softball-Chick (SSC) derided me for it, I experienced childlike fascination with the long, pointy shard of wood that came flying out almost to the first baseman.

Usually I get very bored with the game by the beginning of the 6th inning, but the game you provided this Saturday managed to keep my interest. You must have been giving the game your best effort (because I was there?) because you were leading the Dodgers the whole game. Although this was frustrating for the ear doctor I found it very interesting.

We walked around the stadium to find some better seats and got to watch the game from every vantage. In the end we returned to our seats in the nosebleeds to meet up with the rest of the group. When we got back the ground at our seats was soaking wet with beer. In the time that we'd left to walk around someone has spilled theirs and I missed getting splashed! How great is that.

In the end of the game there was a very tense moment where there was a full count and 2 outs and the pitcher walked one of the players. I really appreciate you keeping the suspense up and letting me feel that I got my money's worth out of my $9 ticket. Very considerate of you.

All in all, I had a wonderful outing and I really appreciate all your hard work.

Sincerely,

Katie

Dear random guy at work,

Alright, I get it. You are more than just a nerdy engineer. You have risen above the countless weekend hours you spent during middle school playing D&D and are now hip, trendy, and have roped in that elusive quality...."coolness."

But please, for all that his holy on God's green earth, STOP TRYING TO PROVE IT BY WHISTLING.

I know you go out to small clubs all around Denver to listen to new undiscovered bands and have the best taste in music. However, why do you feel the need to put those air traffic controller headphones on and whistle along to the burnt copies of the band's CD that the drummer handed you last night after the show?!?!?

Do you realize that the whistling is monotone and pounds in my ears with the unrelenting force of a rabid rebel force?!?!?

And on a Friday afternoon?

Just thought you might like to know how I feel.

Sincerely,

Katie

Dear United Airlines,

I'm writing you to express my joy at discovering a new service that you provide. Thank you so much for sending out an automated message to everyone on a flight that you cancel and rebook. In the future, I see this as a potentially very useful feature. Also, while I hope it never happens to me, if my flight does get cancelled it would be very nice of you to let me know before I brave the Denver traffic to get out to the airport.

However, when you called my cell phone at 6 am this morning to tell me that Ron and Renee Schnider's flight to Chicago had been cancelled and their flights rebooked onto a later flight I was a little bit annoyed.

Last night was the hottest night yet in my airconditioning free bedroom. Coupled with the heat, every muscle in my upper body was SCREAMING from my first day of 2006 summer water skiing. The result? I didn't fall asleep until about 3:30 am when it finally cooled down enough in my room that the glass of water on my nightstand stopped boiling. Imagine my delight to be awoken by the ringing of my phone at 6. Also, because I didn't answer it and just let it go to voicemail (foolishly thinking I could just fall back to sleep) I didn't know who it was.

Suddenly, the words of a nagging voice in the back of my head crystallized.

Who would be calling me so early on a Thursday morning? It must be my mom. It must be an emergency. Oh no, my Uncle, who has been suffering with brain cancer for 12 years, has slipped into critical condition. Now I'm going to have to get a plane ticket up to Seattle. I wonder if the airlines reserve seats at cheaper prices for just such emergencies. Can I afford to even go? Can I afford not to go?

Then, on an adrenaline rush I reached over and picked up the phone. Imagine my elation at hearing the metallic voice of a computer telling me that someone else's flight was cancelled. Someone else who gets to leave work and go on a trip. A vacation. A get away.

In summary, I just want to send my congratulations to your company for offering such a helpful service. I hope in the future this type of thing comes in handy for me and saves me a headache. However, it is clear that there are still a few kinks to work out of the system.

I hope my input has been helpful.

Sincerely,

Katie

Top 10 ways to spend a Tuesday morning

The premise of this countdown list is that you aren't on vacation and still have to go to work. Otherwise, obviously, not going to work and playing all day long is the best way to spend any time.

Without further ado:

10. Lay in bed realizing that you have to go to work, but being late won't be a big deal.
9. Wake up not covered in sweat because it got cool enough the night before to take the sweltering edge off of the air inside your 30 year old, air conditioning free house.
8. Wake up 5 minutes before the alarm and feeling totally alert.
7. Go through the morning routine not dreading the next 8 hours you have to spend at work.
6. Say a really heartfelt prayer.
5. Have your mom call you to tell you that she is going to buy you a plane ticket to come home and visit in July for your birthday.
4. Make yourself an English muffin where every little craggy hole is filled to the brim with delicious, melty real butter.
3. Blare your favorite CD with the windows down until the upper-middle class suburban "Ganstas" in the car next to you look over and make a face that says, "I can't hardly hear my own hard core rap over that crap you're blasting.
2. Realize why you like spending time with your roommate.
1. Hit the lake for 2 hours of waterskiing just as the sun is coming up over the rim and have the most beautiful glassy water of your life.

In case you couldn't tell, all of the above happened to me this morning. HOORAY!

Changes

So, in case you haven't noticed, today is the day of the new blog layout (she announces over the deafening screams of excited fans).

I know, I know, this is a much anticipated day.

You are probably feeling a mix of emotions. Everything from excitement and elation to a bit of fear and betrayal.

Don't worry, everything will be alright.

You'll learn to love the new and different parts of life.

Don't be afraid to let go and experience new things. It can be strange and uncomfortable, but in the end you will have grown into such a stronger, more experienced, more empathetic person.

And isn't that what life is all about....growing, learning, developing?

The Hills

Alright, I have to admit something that is slightly embarrassing.

I am a total sucker for high school teen dramas.

Yesterday I left work early and went to see Just my Luck and guess what....I thought it was decent. Predictable, yes. Cheesy, yes. Just like every other movie in this genre, yes. An enjoyable way to spend an afternoon, yes.

Knowing this, you can't really be surprised when I also admit that I liked watching Laguna Beach. It was bizarre to watch those highschoolers and to realize that that was reality for some people. Some people really did go to high school with people who could all be found in the pages of the latest Abercrombie & Fitch catalogue.

Consequently, I was mildly interested in the new show "The Hills" which follows one of the Laguna kids up to LA to keep filming this person's life. Last night I got around to watching it (thankyou DVR).

It was retarded.

It made me mad that because this person is on MTV she got a very coveted internship with a fashion magazine and she can barely even write. Then, her only job at some dumb celebrity party was to keep people from sitting on a few chairs and she couldn't even do that. It just bugs me knowing that there is probably a ton of people out there who are hard working, smart, ambitious people who would die for that job and here is this MTV kid getting their job and screwing it all up. Ugh.

And her little friend Heidi? When she was in an interview with the dean of her new fashion college she flat out told the dean that she pretty much doesn't care about school and just wants to party. A few times the camera panned back to her face and the only adjective I could think of was vapid.

So why is it that I have total patience for these characters last year when they were in high school and now that they're in the "real world" I can't handle it?

After watching the show I felt kind of bad for the characters because in 10 years they will (hopefully) have matured, found what they really wanted in life and contributed to society and they will have a complete season set of DVDs showing how silly and foolish they were at 19.

At least the rest of us have those dark moments undocumented and not presented for entire country to see.

More on marriage

Earlier in the semester I told a friend that I wouldn't marry someone who wasn't of my same religious faith.

He was shocked.

He called me close minded.

I asked him if he had any kind of traits that he was looking for in someone that he was going to spend his life with. He rattled off a list of things like, athletic, smart, preferably from the mid-west, ect.

The subject of our conversation moved on, but since then I've been thinking about it.

Do you think it is more closed minded to not consider marrying someone because they have a different religious belief, or because they didn't like to rock climb?

Is it really so bad to say, "out of the millions of people who I could potentially spend my life with can't I pick to be with someone who shares the same answer to the fundamental questions of existence, like 'why am I here?' 'what purpose does my life have?' "what happens after death?'"

I just don't think that's a close minded choice.

But if you do, tell me. I want to know. I promise not to be offended in any way. I just want to hear other perspectives out there.

I enjoy being a girl...

I don't know why, but I can never find a dress that I like. They are always too short, too long, the wrong color, the wrong cut, the wrong material, poorly made, way too expensive, ect.

However, after reading Jordan's blog (a cool new blog that I really like), I stumbled onto the dress of my dreams.

It is just beautiful. How I long for this dress. Actually, if it were just a little bit different I would probably have to run right out and drop the whopping $350 that it cost. Here are my alterations that would make this dress absolutely perfect.

First, I would add little capped sleeves. Sleeves that just barley sneak over the top of my shoulder. The sleeves would have curved folds in them to keep the line of the swooping material that goes under the bustline.

Second, I would raise the neckline in the back up a bit. I think a low back is very very pretty, but having it that low means that I probably wouldn't wear it to church. I would like to be able to wear this dress-of-perfection everywhere and for anything and the higher back would let me do that.

Memorial Day Awesome-ness

You know what doesn't really work? Keeping popsicles frozen by sticking them 1/4 of the way down into an ice bath while the air outside is about 80 degrees. I know this because this because I had the unfortunate experience of attempting to do this at our bbq yesterday.

As usual, I invited almost every person I know in a 30 mile radius fully expecting that only 10 or so people would show up. Boy was I wrong. We had about 45 people over to my back yard yesterday for the best party I've ever thrown.

The ear doctor and I spend all morning hauling all of my furniture out into the back yard. We set it up with my coffee tables so that it exactly mirrored my normal front room. Then we got to cooking.

We made the following:

• 8 lbs of milansea beef for delicious tacos. This meat we had to go to the Mexican meat market to get the right stuff. You can't just get this at Safeway.
• 2 lbs of filleted, pounded, lime-chicken.
• 3 different homemade blended salsas. These got to be pretty spicy by the time I had a chance to try any.
• a huge bowl of Pico de Gallo (I whipped this up sans recipe thank you very much)
• 20 million pounds of the ear doctor's secret guacamole. Don't even ask for the recipe because it is a trade secret and I'm not telling.
• These awesome beans that had chorizo and bacon in them.
• 5 gallons of fresh squeezed lime juice....alright it wasn't fresh squeezed but I did grate lime zest into the pitcher, so that counts, right?

When everyone showed up we cranked up the Latin tunes and everyone gorged themselves on the delicious food. The entire 3 hours of the party the ear doctor spent manning the grill (so hot to watch him do) and I scurried back and forth from the food table to the kitchen making sure the tortillas were warm and the bowls were fully stocked.

There were people coming and going everywhere in our house and yard and my roommate was such a good sport about it all. I love love LOVED that the ear doctor's friends from school came. I think they are some of the coolest people I know.

Aside from no one coming to my parties, my biggest fear in throwing something like this is that my different circles of friends won't be able to interact. This party totally set those fears aside. My friends all mingled really well and I felt like everyone walked away having had a great time.

Just as the event was winding down, a little rain cloud burst so everyone hurriedly helped move all my furniture back into the house. During this scramble I decided toss the left over ice from the big blue bucket and found a sticky, melted mess. This is when I learned that the freezer really is a better place to keep popsicles if you're going to actually be able to eat them.

After every last dish had been cleaned and the furniture returned to its proper place in my house the ear doctor and I just sat on the couch exhausted. Totally spent, we just looked at each other with glassy, satisfied eyes. It was then that I realized that I like throwing parties....once a year.

Please please please let your thoughts

I know the LDS (Mormon) perspective on this question, but I'm interested in another point of view.

Do you think getting married is nothing more than a piece of paper?

I'm interested to know.

Pitter Patter

Interesting fact: There are more dogs in the city of Boulder than there are children.

I went to Jamba juice this morning to get a Razzmatazz for me an a Peach Pleasure for my co-worker and there was the cutest little boy there. The strange thing was that my first reaction was genuine surprise to see a child. That doesn't really happen here in Boulder. Now that I think about my time here I realize that the past 3 years of living here have been pretty much kid free.

I never really noticed a lack of children until I got back from our trip out to California/Disneyland. Kids were everywhere out there and they were adorable! And then I was talking on the phone with my bff Kathy about here baby and our friends' babies. Then I thought about gff and her little one and now anth is almost there and it kind of stunned me.

Am I the weird one to be surprised to see a little boy running around Jamba juice at 8 on a Thursday morning?

Probably.

In homage to my dad

My dad isn't the most literary guy. I can only recall about 3 books he has ever read in my presence. Still, he understands that a times a well placed verse can really make a point. This is the only poem my dad has ever memorize and I think it perfectly exemplifies his propensity toward verse.

Orange, Orange
Orange Orange,
Have you no mouth to speak from?
Nor hole to utter one word?
Nope

In honor of my dad and his beautiful simple, yet stirring poetry I would like to take you on a tour of everything that I've eaten today.

Breakfast

This delightful little treasure was my breakfast, accompanied by a cool, refreshing glass of water (which has no color so does not count as eating something off theme).








Lunch
So I didn't actually make my own orange slurpee or anything as this picture suggests, but I couldn't find one picture of an orange slurpee on the internet. I thought the internet was supposed to have everything?!?!? Betrayed!

Also, these little elves know what they are doing. The peanut butter in between the two orange crackers isn't technically in keeping with the spirit of this celebration, but I'm choosing to look the other way.







Snack
Cheez-its are my favorite cracker of all time. Nothing else will make me sit on a couch longer crunching away until either my mouth is raw from the sharp, jagged cracker corners, my stomach explodes, or I reach the bottom of the box. If the last one happens I look down at the box, feeling simultaneously guilty (for having eaten them all) and betrayed (that they have left me sitting there all alone).








I haven't had dinner yet, and am kind of worried I won't be think of anything suitable to eat to honor my father to the level he deserves. I know I will find something. I must find something. Because, really, he is worth the effort.

READ MY BLOG

Do you think it is ego-centric for someone to like the idea that strangers out in cyberspace are interested in reading your thoughts via a blog?

If so, I guess I'm ego-centric.

But I really don't think so.

I think the majority of people crave human connections. We crave the feeling of being accepted and belonging. No one wants to have their life go un-noticed. And a blog can fulfill that need beautifully. It enables people to be brutally honest. To be themselves. To develop different parts of their character and explore different points of view and ideas.

Conversely, I like thinking that there are people out there who get excited to see that I've made a comment. That I'm reading and thinking about them.

It is interesting to me that in a society where we are becoming more and more dependent on technology that we have morphed this once sterile, impersonal entity (the internet) into something that people use to make real connections. To experience real emotion. And, in some instances, to become real friends.

I just think that is cool.

PS I also think it is weird that the spell checker built into blogger doesn't recognize "blog" as a word.

California.....knows how to party

So there is no way I'm going to capture all the awesomeness that was this weekend. But here is my attempt at the highlights.

Thursday
Woke up really really early and caught the 7 am flight to LA. It was so early that the sun was just peaking over the flat and dry planes on eastern Colorado by the time we got to the airport. I barely remember finding my seat and sitting down on the plane. I think I was actually asleep before my booty hit the wornout upholstery of the seat. Arriving in LA, found the rental car place and set out. We were going to see the Getty, but instead went out to the valley to see the house where the ear doctor grew up. As we sat in our beautiful gold dodge stratus in front of his house he told me hilarious story after story about him growing up there with the Asian kids down the street. I learned all about the bully up the street and how he and his friends shot pigeons with bb guns. We drove around and saw his grandparents house and his elementary school. It was so cool to see him talk about when he was a little kid.

After the first trip down memory lane, we went to have a hot dog and fries from two quite shady shacks right next to each other. The fries were amazing and from Daglas. The "Cupid's" hot dogs popped when you bit into them. Coupled with an icy diet Pepsi it was the ideal way to start out our food adventures in California.

After lunch we drove up to the Griffith observatory (which was closed) to check out a view of the city. I picked a flower and gave it to the ear doctor up there. Too bad it was the kind he was allergic to. My bad.

Then, we drove down into the hills to see how the other half lived. Man, are those places impressive. We stopped off at the Chinese theater and noticed that Harrison Ford has great taste in footwear. He made his imprints wearing Chuck Taylors, which the ear doctor noticed because he too was wearing them. We were a little puzzled by the presence of Martin Lawrence's hand and footprints there. I didn't really think that his award winning performances in Big Momma's House 1 and 2 deserved that kind of acclaim, but who am I to judge? We drove down Rodeo Dr. (all I can say is wow) and up to the LA temple.

I was exhausted, so the ear doctor let me sleep the whole drive down to Laguna Nigel. We drove up to his high school where he showed me the football field were he earned his glory and honor. I saw the cement flower planter where all of his friends (the jocks) ate their lunches. I saw the spot on the ceiling where is friend spit a lougee that stuck for 6 years. We went to the house he lived in for high school. He took me to an awesome dinner at a restaurant off the San Clemente pier where we sat on a deck eating awesome seafood and watched surfers below ride out some gnarly waves. The "set was totally going off." Exahusted, we finally arrived at the home of some of the ear doctor's parent's friends where we were treated like royalty. I collapsed into my beautiful feather bed.

Friday
I woke up to the sounds of birds chirping and sausage sizzling. Linda, our hostess, had gone to the trouble of making us eggs, sausage and orange rolls in preparation for our big day. I hurriedly got ready for the day and went down to talk with her. She was amazing. One of those women that just open up their hearts and take you in. She is loving and accepting and I was totally impressed. After eating we took off......For.....DISNEYLAND!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! We got to the park when it opened and didn't leave until 12:30. The park was practically empty. The longest wait we had for any ride was about 20 minutes. We saw all of disneyland and California Adventure in one day! We ate the following: 2 churros (each), tons of diet coke, chicken strips, butter pecan fudge, apple slices with caramel sauce, enchiladas, and frozen bananas.

Saturday
By now I had become a full fledge adopted daughter into the family we stayed with. Saturday morning we all went out for breakfast at Ted's. As I sat around the big round table and talked with these awesome people I was so amazed by how quickly I'd been induced into their family. Both of the actual daughters met us at Ted's for breakfast and brought their kids so it was messy and loud and hilarious.

After breakfast we started our journey up to Santa Barbara. I tried my very hardest to stay awake during the whole ride, and only dozed off for a second or two. We made it to our hotel in Ventura and the ear doctor collapsed while I got ready for the wedding that night. I woke him up a little too late and we were in a rush to get up to Santa Barbara on time. With only the smallest amount of nerves and worry we made it up to the ceremony just fine. This wedding was one of the most beautiful I've been to. It was at a house on the side of the cliffs overlooking the ocean. The flowers were amazing, the bride was beautiful and the groom was beaming. As usually, I got a little teary eyed during the ceremony. Afterward they had an awesome taco bar and I managed to spill an entire bowl of red chile salsa onto my skirt. Luckily, one of the other guests was the daughter of a dry cleaner and rushed over to help me get the stain out. Lifting my skirt into the air for the whole party to see my upper thigh, she dabbed and spotted and did a fairly great job of getting the stain out. It is still there, but hopefully the skirt will be able to be saved. I was SOOOOO embarrassed but later found out that I wasn't the only person who had spilled the salsa. After toasts and cake and sparklers the dancing started. We danced the night away under a clear sky of Californian stars. It was just like a wedding from a movie. As my legs were about to give out, we left the party and stumbled into our beds.

Sunday
I woke up first thinking I would beat the ear doctor to the shower, thereby hastening our check-out at the Comfort Inn. My bleary, eyes spotted a sheet of paper on the floor of our room that had been shoved under the door. It informed us that the water main of the City of Ventura had burst early that morning and no one knew when water would return. Annoyed and dirty, I put on my cloths and woke up the ear doctor to tell him the news. No showers today. Yuck. Just what I want the morning after dancing all night at a wedding. Anyway, we packed up, complained to the front desk and left to explore a little of Santa Barbara before we had to catch our flight home.

We had breakfast at a really cute restaurant on State street and walked up and down it looking for some good shopping finds. I got a pair of pants from Anthropologie (my favorite store of all time) that were way way way on sale. After our little shopping jaunt, we went up to see the Spanish mission and rose garden. The mission was really cool and we met an awesome little dog in one of the crypts.

Realizing how late it was, we bid a fond farewell to Santa Barbara and headed back to the valley for luck and the bear pit. Eating a bbq lamb sandwich on garlic bread at the bear pit is a family tradition of the ear doctor's. It was awesome food! I loved it! There was sawdust on the floor and everything. The ear doctor even got me a t-shirt so I could remember my first time there.

Reluctantly, we headed back to the airport, returned our golden chariot and fell asleep in the chairs at LAX waiting for our flight. The flight attendants on our flight were very rude and I'm thinking about writing a letter to frontier about it, but probably won't.

Anyway, that's our vacation.

Good News

Just so that you all can share in my awesome feeling this morning I wanted to make a list of everything that is putting a bounce in my step.

1. I just got my grades from last semester and got a 4.0. How awesome is that?!?!?!
2. Tomorrow the ear doctor and I are leaving for a long weekend in California. We are spending one day at Disneyland and two up in Santa Barbara. I've never been up to SB before and I'm really excited. We're going for a friend's wedding and I know it is going to be amazing.
3. My roommate and I are really getting along well right now. That makes such a difference.
4. Last night I hosted a pretty amazing dinner party...so good there were no leftovers at all.
5. The flowers I planted in my front yard last week are taking root and looked beautiful when I left for work this morning.
6. I got a really awesome surprise for the ear doctor that I know he is going to love.
7. I'm thinking about going home to Washington for Memorial Day because I found out that both my brother's family and my sister and her husband are going. If I go then the whole family will be together, which doesn't happen nearly as often as I'd like.

That's all. Pretty awesome, huh!?!?

Bone cracking

I don't deal well with intensity.

Last night the ear doctor and I went to watch MI:3. I have to admit I thought it was pretty good. The plot was alright, the characters weren't as unbelievably shallow as they could have been and the people were all nice on the eyes. Plus, that Asian chick totally rocked that red dress at the Vatican.

Anyway, the whole time I was holding the ear doctor's hand. I don't know what it is about me, but high intensity movies induce rigormortis-like cramping in my extremities. Heart-pounding loud music and explosions make my hands curl into little veloca-raptor vice grips. Once during the movie I think I was latching onto his hand so tightly that I actually think I cracked a couple of his knuckles. Weird, huh.

Crazy New Mexicans

On a whim, the ear doctor and I decided to take off last Wednesday and drive down to the Carlsbad Caverns. Our finals were both over, and I hadn't really been able to bring myself back to full time status quite yet. We packed up and took off.

We decided to stay the first night in Santa Fe, so after driving for 6 hours we pulled off the road and found our way to the lovely Super 8. So, in case you don't know this about him, the ear doctor kind of hates Kokopelli. He doesn't understand them and doesn't know why people in the Southwest plaster them all over the place as a decoration. I think it's funny how irked he gets by these little dancing habengers of good luck, so I point them out wherever possible. Before embarking on the trip we thought it would be funny to count how many we saw over the weekend.

Bad idea.

When we unlocked our room of the Super 8 and flipped on the lightswitch was was gleaming back at us? Yes, a centrally located kokopelli cut out complete with his pet lizard and howling coyote. Beautiful. The room on the very first night of our trip was bedecked in the official symbol of the southwest. In the fist day the number of kokopelli grew so enormous that it was too big of a task to undertake. We gave up.

Can I just tell you something? I loved Santa Fe. Such a cute little town with some real roots. It seemed like we'd strolled right into a real Mexico hacienda. If you ever have the chance to be driving through, plan on spending some time there. Get a "Frito pie" from the five and dime, but watch out because it may burn your mouth up like it did mine. Go to the cathedral of St. Francis Assisi, but don't go on a day when there is a funeral, like we did. Talk to the locals because they are friendly, colorful and most of the time crazy. Eat breakfast or lunch at Pascual's cafe and you'll feel like your in a Boulder sister city. Eat dinner at Los Mayas which is complete with a young boy who doesn't speak English mixing guacamole at your table and an ambiance articulated by the blue tarp roof.

Thursday afternoon we bid a fond farewell Santa Fe and hit the road again for the caverns. The road down there goes right through Roswell, NM so of course the ear doctor and I had to stop. Talk about a strange place. The McDonalds had a huge silver UFO to play in and we found our way to a really creepy little store that sold souvenirs and had a walk through diorama of alien landings. I got some socks.

Finally, after 4 more hours of driving we found our way to Whites City, NM where we decided to throw out our tent and camp for the next two nights. We ate dinner at the "Velvet Garter" which I thought was going to be a whole lot sketchier than it was. The food was pretty bad, but there was a salad bar. For some reason, and I didn't really know this about him, the ear doctor loves a salad bar. As a rule I am pretty opposed to paying to serve myself. The food was overpriced, but while we were eating we eavesdropped on a really old couple that argued the entire meal. It was so funny to listen to them bicker back and forth! My stomach was aching by the time we were done from the entertainment.

I think we were the only people within a 10 mile radius under the age of 40 the whole weekend.

The caverns were amazing. I really can't do them justice by describing them, so you'll have to just put it on your list as something to do before you die. Also, one night we watched the Mexican Free-tailed bats come out of the cave. That was seriously mind blowing.

Back in Action

Ahhhhhh






Sweet relief

All I have left of this semester is to finish up one design project. This last 10 days has been pretty harrowing, but there were a few moments of brilliance that made the whole push worthwhile. They shine like little pearls of beauty in the midst of a field of mire, but are so bright that they overpower anything else I can retain in my memory.

Now, it is back to the standard 40 hour work week for an entire glorious summer.

A summer I hope will be filled with water skiing before work, camping over long weekends and going to visit people I love all over this country.

Shuffle

Sunday morning I woke up early and rearranged all the furniture in my bedroom. My bed which was pointed to the West is now pointed North. I moved my circle chair up to the attic because it was just taking up space, and that was what I was craving.

Space.

Please, oh please can't I find some more space somewhere.

I never really understood why people cut themselves. I've heard people do it to feel like they are in control of something. Correct me if I'm wrong, but they feel like things in their lives are so out of control, but cutting makes them feel like they have a handle on things.

I think this is same reason why some people become anorexic.

And why my roommate has fanatical drive to go to the gym.

And why I move my furniture around.

Religious Confusion

So yesterday I was sitting in a school meeting and my friend was talking about Passover. This other girl, eavesdropping, piped up and said, "Oh, is that still going? I thought it was on Sunday."
I just looked at her for a minute confused.

Then I said, "Passover and Easter are different holidays."

Laughing she said, "oh, right."

I, trying to not be condescending, but I'm sure failing miserably said back, "you realize that Passover is a Jewish holiday and Easter is a Christian."

Puzzled she said, "then what is Lent?"

My brains almost exploding, I retorted, "that's Catholic."

Are there people out there in the general public who don't know these basics of other religions? Do you think she is the norm for the American public? I sure hope not.

Taking minutes to breathe

I've never been really good at relaxing. My whole life has felt like I'm being driven, driven, driven to suceed; and not necessarily suceed by my own definition. Recently I've felt like I'm being driven but as I turn to glance behind me to see who is pushing so hard, I'm surprised to see no one there.

Once again I am thrown back onto the never ending mobius strip of self evaluation. Rethinking my choices, beliefs, and self image always seems to engross most of my spare minutes.

I pause from my self-imposed driving long enough to look around. I pick up my eyes and make sure that the goal I'm driving towards holds more for me than just more driving. I remember that I'm not here just for the driving, but for the goal.

The goal.

The thing that makes the driving not a grueling pointless effort, but rather a refining processes. A way to strengthen my muscels and resolve. A method to shape and mold me into a greater person than a life without the driving could produce.

And for that I tuck my head back down, pick up the plow and move on. But this time, with direction.

I love the Spring

School lasts one month too long in Colorado.

How do they expect me to spend any time in front of a computer while it is 75, blue skies and beautiful outside?

If I could have put yesterday on pause for the rest of my life I think I'd have had the perfect life. It was sunny, beautiful and I was surrounded by people that I think are great. I made the most delicious pork chops I've ever had (in or out of a restaurant).

I almost crammed my frisbee into my purse today so that if there was any down time and I could find someone to throw with I'd have a chance. Regrettably I took it out before I left the house because I don't need any temptation to deter me from the stuff I need to get done.

Being responsible sucks, and it sucks even more for me because I have this lame, driven, ambitious personality that won't allow me to blow anything off.

Sad, I know.

About to go psycho

Person in the next cube from me has let their cell phone battery die and it is now beeping every 3 seconds.

I am about to go postal.

The only thing holding me back from ripping down the beige colored, padded half wall is the thought that two weeks ago I left my phone on at work while I was at school. It was probably just as annoying to have my phone ring all day without anyone to answer it.

Good thing I'm leaving in half an hour or my patience might wear thin. Who knows what might happen then.

Faith

The ear doctor has been telling me for almost a year that something exists that I just couldn't believe. I'd never seen it, so my sense of logic just wouldn't let me believe that it indeed was real. I asked everyone around me and none of them had seen or felt it either. Nowhere could I get a tangible, logical, real piece of evidence as to its existence besides the ear doctor's testimony as to the truthfulness of it.

But, I was wrong.

It does exist.

Yes, I was unable to prove that these delicious little treats existed until this week when the ear doctor found some for me in Arizona. The sweetness of this knowledge is beyond compare and is so precious to my heart now that it motivates me to want to share it's goodness with all those around me.

Bless you hostess and long live the CHOCODILE!

For Poodle

Because I hardly EVER get tagged for these things and it boosts my ego to think that someone actually wants to know this stuff.


Five Movies You Can Watch Over and Over:
1. 10 Things I Hate About You
2. Beaches (because it reminds me simultaneously of Kath and my mom)
3. Anne of Green Gables (my sick day movie)
4. Wedding Singer
5. White Christmas

Five embarrassing Songs that You Know All the Words To:

First of all, I'm really good at remembering lyrics so if I've heard an embarrassing song I probably know all the words.

1. "My Heart Will Go On" by Celine
2. "Hit my Baby One More Time" by Madame Spears
3. "Jesus Take the Wheel" by that American Idol chick
4. "Lady in Red" by Seal? (Thanks a lot stake dances)
5. "Mambo Number 5"

Five Memorable Halloween Costumes:
1. Child-like Empress from Never-ending story
2. Cleopatra
3. God's Gift to Men
4. My sister as a zombie
5. The ear doctor as a lawn gnome

Five Occupations that You Know You Could Never Do:
1. Day Care Provider. 20 screaming 4 year olds is my version of personal hell.
2. CEO. I don't like having to fake like I am interested in hearing what other people say.
3. Travel Agent. It would kill me to think of all these awesome vacations for other people to take.
4. McDonalds crew member. I would be constantly in a power struggle with the crew chief. It would just be too hard to take orders from someone when I know the best way to make the chicken nuggets.
5. I can't think of anything else.

Five Books You've Recently Read Outside of Schoolwork:
1. The Unbearable Lightness of Being
2. The Secret Life of Bees
3. 700 Sundays
4. Son of a Witch
5. Chronicles of Narnia

Five Ways to Perfectly Spend an Afternoon:
1. Going to a Movie
2. Getting an early dinner with the ear doctor
3. Walking around the Mall making jokes with a friend
4. Having a snow ball fight
5. Going swing dancing

Not Your 5 Favorite Foods, But the 5 You're Most Likely Eating:
1. French Onion Soup from Mimi's
2. English muffin with ridiculous amounts of delicious melted butter
3. Diet Pepsi and a bag of pretzels
4. The ear doctor's famous potatoes
5. Pear Spinach Salad

Five People Who Must Immediately Respond:
1. The Takahashis, because Eleanor freakin never posts
2. Mags, because I always like to know what she's thinkin about
3. Anth, because her little baby needs to know this kind of stuff. Remember, it's for posterity, so be honest
4. K, because she's awesome
5. Can't think of anyone else

My trip

How cool is it that my big huge awesome trip is so close that I can look at what the weather will be like on the 5 day forecast!!!!!

I checked it out and it says it will probably rain on the first day we're there, but the second day will be partly sunny!

This week is pretty much a wash for me. I have absolutely no desire to get anything done. All I want to do is hang out with friends and pack for my trip. I think I'll end up taking a mostly empty suitcase and bringing back tons of souvenirs. I'm SUCH a tourist, but I don't care.

So, in case any of you were interested, here is the barebones plan of our trip.

Arrive in London and rent a car to drive up to Carnforth, which is in the Lake District (I think). This will be an adventure since none of us know our way around and we'll be driving on the wrong side of the road.

We will spend 6 days up there touring around checking out the countryside and seeing castles and stuff. One day we are driving up to Scotland.

At the end of our trip we're spending 3 days seeing London. We are going to do all of the stuff that you really should see in London and hopefully go to a show one night.

Then I will fly back home to Colorado and somehow go back to school and work and being productive.

Until then,

Cheerio!

Becoming a Food-ie

Lately I have really started to enjoy food.

I've always liked the eating of it, but the last 6 months have really started to pique my interest in mixing flavors and becoming adept in the kitchen.

This is why I've fallen head over heals in love with a new show on Bravo.

It's called Top Chef.

Its a bunch of people who think they can really cook well in a reality show competing to win money.

The thing that gets me about this show is that when something doesn't come together they make excuses. They sit at the judging table and complain about the time constraint or the freezer not working, or the ice cream melting in transit.

"History will never accept difficulties as an excuse."
-John Fitzgerald Kennedy, Albert W. Daw Collection

Similarly, as a TA I hear repeatedly from students that the classes are just too hard. They whine to me about how much time and effort they have to put into their assignments.

In response I furrow my brow and say, well, this is engineering. No one said it was going to be easy, but I promise it will be worth it.

I'm so tired of people constantly complaining that things are hard for them when they've put themselves in the situation.

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

As a full blooded, red headed Scotts-Irish lass I'd like to wish you all the luckiest of days.

For all of you interested out there I thought I'd put together a little St. Patrick's day trivia test. If you can answer all of the questions correctly you may consider yourself Irish for the day.

1) When was St. Patrick born?
2) What are all of the shapes and colors of the marshmallows in Lucky Charms?
3) Where and when was St. Patrick's Day first celebrated in America?
4) What gift do you get if you kiss the Blarney Stone?
5) How do you find a leprechaun?
6) What happens if you ask a leprechaun for four wishes?

Scared of the Dark

I have a confession to make.

When I got to bed at night and walk across my dark room to my bed an embarrasing thought flits through my head.

It is quick and fleeting, but somehow evokes a slight emotional response.

I momentarliy think that someone/thing is going to reach out from under my bed, grab my ankles and drag me under my bed.

Yes, I am 24 years old and this fear still haunts me from childhood.

I blame Fred Savage.

I'm looking into getting the clapper so that I don't have to walk across my room in the dark.

Slight misrepresentation

A co-worker of mine is reading Under the Banner of Heaven and forwarded me this article. I haven't read the book, so don't really have an opinion about it. My co-worker comes in almost every day to talk about my religion and faith, which is fine becuase we are friends and it isn't in a confrontational manner at all.

From what I gather, the story is about two people (one being Dan Lafferty) who have been ex-communicated from the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who ended up killing their sister-in-law and her baby becuase they felt they had a divine revelation from God to do so.

Crazy, I know.

I'm fine with people writing whatever they want to about my religion.

I'm really ok when people really study it and come to their own decision about its tenets, even if those ideas are completely opposite of my own.

What kind of annoys me is when people make stupid comments about people and faith like this:


"I don't believe Dan Lafferty is crazy or a psychopath," Krakauer said. "He is an example of an inevitable outcome of strong belief."


How can an educated person really only look at this one example of ardent faith/belief and use that to stereotype people who have strong beliefs.

If he is going to do that, I'd feel like it would be alright to counter with an example myself.

Ever heard of a little lady called Mother Teresa?

I'm pretty sure you could say she was a person with "strong belief" who somehow managed to avoid the "inevitable" outcome of killing a member of her family.

Jeez, some people.

Prof. Ear Doctor

Hey, if anyone has a free second to think about the ear doctor and wish him good luck today at 11 am Mountain Time, please do it.

He's teaching his first collegiate level lecture today and he's going to rock those undergrads world's!

Katie related Tid-bits

• Yesterday it snowed a ton here in Colorado. Foolishly, I wore my very long, worn out jeans and my new green tennis shoes. After one walk across campus my pants were soaked to the knee and my feet were freezing.
• When the ear doctor took me to dinner I didn't want to be wet and cold so I threw my stuff in his dryer and wore his huge sweatpants, boy-socks, and hiking shoes. It looked ridiculous.
• After dinner I went out with my school friends. We saw a pretty decent band play and had some laughs. It was the first time I'd hung out with these boys outside of school. It was awesome.
• I went to bed last night looking up at the constellations of glow-in-the-dark stars that someone probably stuck to my ceiling 10 years ago. It reminded me of my room from high school and I happily fell asleep missing my family.

What a pain

Just thought you all should know that the weather here in Colorado was so nice this weekend that I actually got a pretty decent sunburn.

That dermal pain should then be added to my aching back from playing intense ultimate frisbee with a bunch of boys.

And my throbbing finger from the blood blister developed from pinching it in my sliding glass door.

Despite my mighty injuries, I had an EXCELLENT weekend.

Thanks for asking.

Donald Trump is cringing

This morning as I was getting ready I was listening to the radio. An advertisement came on the air for the local Indian casino.

Their schtick was pretty much the same loud talking-music booming announcer promising a good time as every other casino commercial. Except for one small thing.

If you come into the casino Tuesday nights they'll give you a free porcelain doll.

What??

Are curly blonde headed dolls really enticements for the players of blackjack?

Maybe the casino should hire someone besides 9 year old little girls to run their marketing department.

The little things

The ear doctor just called me is "boo" via text message.

It made me laugh out loud.

This is how I know we are great together.

That Hansel, he's so hot right now

Today I saw a 65 year old man struggling to climb up a slight incline on a Razor Scooter.

I wanted to tell him that it would be a lot easier if he were just walking because every time he lifted his kicking leg off the ground he would slow down, and actually slide backward a little bit. But I didn't.

Plus, he is 65 and should probably give up the Razor Scooter since not even 10 year olds think they are cool anymore.

Then I thought about a friend from college who loved his Razor Scooter and realize that I was actually seeing a version of him 40 years down the road and it made me smile.

Never stop learning

Last night I finally redeemed one of the many gift certificates the ear doctor has given me as a gift over the past year.

I went down to the seasoned chef cooking school and had my first cooking lesson.

At first I was a little nervous that I would be the youngest person there and no one would be nice to me, but boy was I wrong.

It was SOOOOOOO much fun!

I was one of the younger people there, but it really didn't matter. Everyone was so nice and the food we all made together was AMAZING.

Here is the list of stuff we made last night:

Field Greens with Champagne Vinaigrette

Penne with Roasted Tomato Sauce

Sauted Filet of Salmon with Chive and Oregano Aioli

Perfect Herb-Roasted Chicken

Rice Pilaf

Broccoli with Shallots and Mustard Seed

Rustic Apple Crostada

Doesn't that all sound D-lishious! It was. My favorite was the chive and oregano aioli with the salmon. I willdefinitelyy be making that some time soon.

She ain't nothin but a gold digger

Ever heard of that "Languages of Love" book? I borrowed it from my friend James about 5 years ago and just couldn't bring myself to read it all the way through. After reading the first chapter it just seemed too self-helpish for me.

Anyway, what I did get out of the book was the main tenets of the theory (I think).

The author stated that there are 5 different ways that people show and recieve affection.

After at least 5 minutes of thought I think I've determined my own "Language of Love." I think I am tokens of affection.

Normally this wouldn't cause me any concern, let alone enough to write a post about, but a comment left me on my previous post made me stop and think. Is it shallow of me to feel loved through the recieving of physical tokens? Does that make me some kind of Tiffany's bracelet craving, superficial girlfriend?

Who is to say that recieving a note or little gift is a lesser method of expressing affection than wanting to be around someone or telling them you love them?

Because really, for me, when the ear doctor leaves a little treat or surprise on my bed or under my windshield wiper it is just as good or almost better than when we sit on the couch and cuddle. It means that he was thinking of me, even when we weren't together.

And that means a lot to me.

My take on Valentines Day

Yesterday I ran an informal statistical survey about the importance/legitimacy of Valentines day.

My results were somewhat shocking.

Not one person polled was in support of the holiday.

I asked a wide demographic of people, but stayed mainly with my age range. I polled married people, single people, people in long term relationships, people who date around and all were opposed to the holiday.

One person said, "I'm not really into obligation, and that's all the Valentines Day is"

I replied, "If it feels like an obligation to show someone you love them then you're probably with the wrong person."

Everyone said it was just a holiday invented by hallmark and the 1-800-flowers to suck money out of the public. They said it was dumb and built up too much. They commented that no one should need a specific day to show someone you love them.

On their first two points, I may marginally agree. The holiday is perhaps blown a bit out of proportion.

To the last one I raise my right eyebrow, tilt my head and wonder, "true, but do you actually show someone how much you care everyday?"

I'd bet the answer is no.

I know I don't tell the ear doctor how much I care about him as often as I think about it. I don't tell my roommates how much I appreciate it when they ask my how my day was and honestly care about the response. I don't send my friends all over the country the letters they deserve to keep in touch.

So what is so wrong with having a designated world-wide day to show people that you care.

It's a lot better than letting the time slip by assuming they know.

My Olympic post

Now, I don't want to dis the Salt Lake City Olympic opening ceremonies, but did any of you happen to catch the one in Torino. Holy cow, it was awesome!

Where we had a bunch of singing hand-cart pioneers they had a huge choreographed ski jumper, and Pavorati, and cirque de solei.

I watched the whole thing. (Thank you TIVO for letting me fast forward through the many commercials and boring speeches).

I only have a few comments.

1) What is with our outfits? Why on earth must we cling to the stupid beret for a head cover? Why can't we wear beanies like every other American winter-sport enthusiast does? Seriously.

2) I was so happy to see that at the end the Italian athletes got more screen time and attention. It's nice to not feel like the center of the universe for a change.

3) That torch lighting was AMAZING. Defiantly a high-light.

4) If we are going to send a woman to represent the US in carrying in the flag, I think we could have done a little better than a movie star. She was seriously out-classed by the rest of the women carrying that flag and I felt a little bad for her.

New Shoes

Love, LOVE, L-O-V-E my new shoes

The end of the world as I know it

Woke up this morning thinking about the same thing I think about every Friday morning...yup, you guessed it...the friday doughnut.

Realized that I woke up early enough to actually do my hair and still get one of the chocolate ones (they always go the quickest).

Stepped out of my house and saw the 5 inches of beautiful new snow piled on top of car and wasn't annoyed. Rather, the thought of the doughnut luring me to work really put some ferocity into scraping arm.

Checked watch and saw that it was still early enough to sweep the snow off my front steps so that the mailman would deliver the mail. Sure, that meant probably gettgin stuck with the plain glazed doughnut, or the weird coconut covered one, but felt like it was ok since my roommates would appreciate my work.

Hopped into my car and started to drive to work.

The drive took 25 minutes just to get across town. Saw two sliding wrecks on the way. Nervously looked at console clock realizing that every minute that clicked away reduced chances of even getting said doughnut.

Almost sprinted across the parking lot in eager anticipation.

Rounded the corner to office and stopped dead in tracks.

No doughnuts today.

Can't even start to describe the crushing dissapointment.

Feel too bad about going out of MY way to actually get myself a doughnut, especially as am lugging my rockstar bag filled with gym clothes.

Not so great to be me today

Wow, sometimes I am really impressed by other people.

In a stunningly hurtful and immature move I mistakenly sent an email that was meant for a friend to and entire group. The contents of said email included some very mean and I'd like to think totally out of character sentences. Well, as I'm sure you've guessed, I had clicked the stupid "Reply All" button instead of just "Reply" and this scathing email to the target of my fury.

When I realized what I had done waves of grief and embarrasment flooded over me in such intense waves that I immedaitely was blinded by tears. There were many reasons I was so affected.

First, I imagined myself getting a similar email and the hurt I would feel. It would crush me.

Second, I realized that despite the mature grown-up reflection of myself that I have started to become slightly narcassistic with, I still have those ugly, gross, childish, backbiting, mean, judgemental spots of tarnish looking back at me.

Third, I have put a serious speed bump for our entire group and this project we have to do together.

So I followed this email up with a personal apology asking her for forgiveness.

Not only was her response completely classy, but it was totally forgiving.

This person who I thought was obnoxious and slightly lacking in social graces proved to be way better at them than myself. She showed me how a real adult should deal with problems. She taught me more than I could ever have learned about myself in the span of 2 short hours.

Thoughts

Right now I'm feeling pretty freakin awesome.

This morning I wasn't. I read by friend Bryan's post about being stoked about MIT and I started feeling like my choice of grad school wasn't challenging/impressive enough. I started feeling in the pit of my stomach like I'd opted for the easy way out and that I wasn't really pushing myself. I have so much to offer and I was feeling like my choice to go to CU wasn't going to get me where I should be going.

I just spent all morning working out a hefty piece of code that shows how light bounces around inside a telescope and it rocks. I feel like I'm learning cool things and succeeding at them so the earlier feelings of inadequacy and unimportance have subsided and I realized that my experience and contribution to this field is going to be what I make of it, regardless of where I've picked to go to school.

Oh, and I finally got a REALLY cool bag that can hold all of my stuff. Brown leather with brushed gold studs. Tres cute.

Watch that first step....it's a doooooosey

Ever since Bill Murray immortalized the little guy in that famous movie, Punxsutawney Phil has caputred my immagination.

So much so that last week I tried to see how much it would cost for me to buy some tickets and jet out to enjoy the festivities.

I mean, come on, how can you say no to this:

I can't really think of many more fun things than gathering together at a place called "Gobblers Nobb," joining hands with the locals and dancing in circles to celebrate an almost rodent's prediction of the weather.

Ungrateful

This semester I am taking a class that should be really cool. The whole class (of about 30 students) is broken into 3 groups and in those groups we write up a spacecraft proposal. That's it. For the whole semester.

The only down side is that there is the most annoying person in the whole wide world in my group. They talk about inane topics incessantly and it drives me up the wall.

Yesterday I went to a kick-off meeting for a new club at school (SEDS in case you're wondering) and the annoying-monster was there. They took one look at the 8 foot long FREE sub sandwich the club had provided to anyone who wanted any and said, "um, next time you might want to consider a vegetarian option."

I was floored.

I wanted to turn to them and say, "Hello, it's free food and you don’t have to eat it if you don't want to. Why should an entire room full of people cater to your needs?"

But I didn't. Because I have some MANNERS.

Packing Problems

Serious problem.

This semester, for the first in my life, I am not buying any books. Shocking, I know. I'm only taking 2 classes and they are both upper division grad courses for which the teachers believe themselves the only people qualified enough to be able to issue us information.

This isn't the problem.

The problem is that, without the necessity of carrying books back and forth from campus all I really need is a small steno notebook to takes notes. And I also need a small stack of handouts the teacher has passed around the class.

And a half filled Diet Pepsi bottle.

And a bag of pretzels.

Plus my wallet, keys and cell phone.

All of these things are kind of hard to manage without some kind of device in which to carry them.

I've tried cramming them in my purse, but the hand outs are too tall without folding them over and as soon as I add mittens to the mix the little magnetic button doesn't provide enough force to really get the thing closed.

The next logical step is to use my backpack.

This is where the problem steps in.

Many of you may come from other backgrounds than engineering, so I will have to explain why this is a problem. To do so I will use an analogy.

In the 80's women’s fashion in the workplace fell in love with a little accessory known affectionately as the shoulder pad. They were intended to give an otherwise beautifully formed woman the look of a linebacker and thereby make her and important presence in the board room. The shoulder pad was used to immediately demonstrate your power.

In engineering academia, the backpack provides a similar sign. The bigger, heavier and more stuffed your backpack is, the harder you are working to attain scholastic heights.

This semester I just don't have enough stuff to appropriately fill my backpack. If I put everything I need in my pack and sling it onto my back it would sit there, lying limp, telling the whole world that I am a slacker dum-dum.

This I cannot have.

I've thought about filling my backpack with extraneous books to make it look full and thereby fool the world, but that would just make me tired, and eventually give it up.

Maybe I could stuff it like a 7th grader's bra.

No, that wouldn't do because inevitably someone would squeeze the side and then rumors would fly around the department that I stuffed.

I guess the only solution is to keep juggling all my stuff and making people think I have such and unbelievably huge amount of books, binders and notes that there was just no physical way any human being could fit them into a backpack.

My trip to the dark side

Today I took a trip to the dark side.

Mustering all the courage that I could I took my first tentative step into (duh duh duh) the engineering library.

Although I am an engineer through and through, for some reason I have always shied away from entering the inner sanctum of the engineering library. It always seemed to me that the engineering library was the ultimate demise of all potentially well-socially adjusted people. It was like as soon as anyone entered the twilight zone of the engineering library they were sucked into a vortex of taped together horn-rimmed glasses and high-water pants.

Anyway, I needed to use a book that was put on reserve which mean (horror of horrors) I would have to actually sit in that library the entire time I was using that book.

I went up to the counter and couldn't see anyone there to help me. There was a little silver concierge type bell and a sign indicating I was supposed to ring it. As if I didn't already feel like I, the only girl with mascara on for miles, didn't really fit in, now I was required to sound a bell to announce my presence. I reached my hand out and touched the top of the bell. Time stood still as every head turned in my direction. As though I had a sign on me that said, "look at me, I don’t belong" I turned to the librarian lady who had instantly appeared from nowhere.

There could not have been a more typical librarian at the counter. Short, overly curly, prematurely graying hair was accented by beautiful cat-eyed glasses and lovely faux gold chain attaching both ears. In a completely irritate tone she asked me for the call number of the book I was checking out. With shaking hand I gave her the call number and in a moment she returned with the tome.

It must have been a very valuable book because in the stare down she gave me reminded me of that one time I got pulled over for speeding coming home from a party on New Years. I must have been barely up to her standards, because she haltingly handed over the book.

As I sat at the table and furiously scribbled information I felt completely isolated. There was not a single other girl in the entire library. It was strange. As I walked back and forth, from and to the copy machine (which BTW was 15 cents a page!) I felt like I was a model on a runway. Not that I was looking that great, but I had a riveted audience.

One short hour later I shut the book, threw it off into a return bin, and scuttled out of there. Don't worry, upon close examination there seems to have been limited effect of the engineering library on my psyche. No socks with my sandals...check. Full length jeans....check. Ability to speak to the opposite gender....check.

Networking

Usually I am all for having dinner parties. Most of the time they are my very favorite way to meet/spend time with people. They are just long enough to have a really interesting conversation with someone, and just short enough to be able to end something really annoying. The food always provides some kind of conversation starter and usually something funny always happens.
Every month my church congregation offers what they innocuously call "friendship dinners." The idea behind the gathering is to help members of the group get to know each other on a social level, instead of the formality of church attendance. The main thrust is to provide the new people a chance to worm their way into the already established friendships in the congregation.

These dinners usually end up being pretty entertaining, mainly because there is hardly ever anyone new attending these events.

Saturday night the ear doctor and I attended one of these dinners.

These dinners are a little different than normal ones.

To start off, no one chooses who is at the dinner party with them. This makes for some awkward situations. Secondly, the LDS community has a really bad habit of showing up late to things, and not RSVPing. You never know how many people will show up to your dinner or when. Lastly, people don't really understand the concept of pot luck, so you end up having nine zillion salads with no dressing and three plates of overcooked chocolate chip cookies.

Saturday was an exception to the rule because my friend just decided to make all the food and ask people to chip in a couple of bucks on the way out. The ear doctor and I arrived to the dinner first (because it was being held at his house). We sat on the couch and waited for the entertainment to arrive.

As the room filled with awkward people making awkward small talk, the ear doctor and I sat back and observed the dynamics of the room.

The make up of the room was 10 guys, and 4 girls. 2 of the girls were with their boyfriends, leaving 2 that were single. One of the single girls was new to the congregation and was an instant magnet for the marriage-crazed guy who was attending. He monopolized her every moment and didn't leave her alone for a minute. I ended up talking to the other single girl the rest of the night because it was pretty clear that she wasn't interested in talking to anyone else really. The one outsider sat on the couch and made comments which killed any resemblance to a normal conversation. The other couple was quiet and kept to themselves. The host put on weird music. And at the end of the night we all left.

I don't know if any real "friendships" were formed by the friendship dinner, but it sure was entertaining to watch.

Aghast

In case you don't know anything that is going on in the NFL right now, the Denver Broncos are doing pretty well.

In a normal average season this city gets fully behind the Broncos, so you can imagine what it is like now. I can't go for 10 minutes of my day without hearing someone talk about the Broncos and their chance at the superbowl this year. Everyone is making bets and turning the game this weekend into a pretty high stakes event.

On my way into work today I heard about the most amazing bet.

This woman is a die hard Broncos fan. Her boyfriend is a hard core Steelers man. Therefore, this weekend's game is of particular interest to them, so they made a bet. If the Broncos win this weekend, the woman is allowed to SLEEP WITH ANYONE SHE WANTS once, and vice versa for the Steelers.

Am I the only one who is just shocked by this wager?

Apparently, she says they are in a committed relationship to which neither has ever been unfaithful.

I just don't get it.

Doing what you want

There is a girl that is in some of my classes this semester who is miserable. She doesn't like the program, she doesn't like Colorado, and, for all I can tell, she doesn't really like me. Every time we talk she complains. From my perspective it seems like every day she wakes up expecting the day to disappoint. More often than not, she is satisfied.

Recently she has decided that she is going to finish the program a semester early and get out of this department.

When she told me this I thought for a moment and then told her, "good, you shouldn't spend one day doing something that you don't want to."

Deep, good advice, huh!?!

Since saying that a few days ago it has really been on my mind. Should every day be filled only with things you want to do? Is a life lived otherwise as deplorable as Hollywood would have us believe? Is there some merit to sucking it up for a while, doing something you don't want to do for the greater good? Or, in doing so, are you still doing what you want because what you want falls into a greater vision of happiness?

For example.

A while ago I wasn't really enjoying my job. I came in, and I left as soon as I could. I got the job done, and did it well, but I didn't really want to be there. I came to work because it provided me a means to live the lifestyle I wanted in the moment. Also, I came to work because I realized that it gave me experience and provided the necessary stepping stone to get me where I wanted to be in the future.

Looking at it from one perspective, I was doing something every day that I didn't want to do. From the other side of the coin, I was doing what I had to to get to where I wanted to be.

It is this latter perspective that keeps me going when I have a day like yesterday.

Hittin the slopes

Today it's snowing and, from the weather report I heard on the radio on my way into work, it is supposed to be constant all day today and let up tomorrow morning. How on earth am I expected to get anything done with this kind of distraction?!?!? Seriously, I've only skied ONCE on my brand new beautiful girls.

So far this semester is shaping up to be really awesome. I only have one class on Friday. No work and one class! How awesome is that? Too bad it is at 1 in the afternoon, making it kind of hard to get up to the resorts and back in time, but maybe I can go to eldora in that span of time? Maybe I'll try it next week.

Just a question

Ever had one of those stupid low self esteem moments? You're sitting there knowing that it really doesn't mean anything, but for some reason you're deep in a funk and you can't seem to find a way out. You fully realize that you're making a bigger deal out of things than they really warrant. You keep telling yourself that your friends really do like you, you really are smart, and not all that bad looking.

What? You haven't?

Yeah, well, me either.

The law of increase

It seems that 2005 was the year for people I know to make large acquisitions in their lives.

My sister acquired a husband.

My bff Kathy acquired the sweetest and most adorable baby girl.

My roommate acquired a huge sofa.

My friend genius acquired a degree (and a swell husband).

But for all this gaining experienced by those around me, one would suppose that the trend would rub off on me. Alas, this seems not to have been the case.

Being your run of the mill human, this realization makes me pause. As I allow myself a little moment of introspective indulgence I wonder, do I use acquisitions in life to give myself a little sense of satisfaction and accomplishment? In the long list of names posted to the universal classroom wall does my name have less gold stars next to it than it should?

If I am honest with myself about my belief of constant progression would I count 2005 as a wash because, really, what progression did I make?

Alright, sure, I am a year older and smarter, and I have a semester of grad school under my belt, but what do I physically have to show for the last set of 365 days?

More importantly, why do I feel the need to have something physical? Is it a product of my elementary school days where I got a sticker for having read 10 pages of a Judy Blume novel? Why couldn't the reading have been the reward itself? Is it my ultra-western-driven grooming that has produced this person who needs something to prove that my time has been well spent and that I am growing and learning?

Maybe, for the good of us all, we should eliminate those metallic gold star stickers from our society entirely.

A Space for Me

Coming back to your real life after taking almost a month off is strange.

I feel like a totally different person.

So different in fact, that this new person required a total overhaul of my bedroom. I just couldn't stand to come back to the same room I left. For all my hard work on the old room, it never really felt like me. It never really made me feel like I chose it. It was an odd place for me to spend so much time because usually I can't stand to have many things happen to me that I'm not totally satisfied with...especially something that is so totally within my control.

So, this weekend before school started, I totally re-decorated my room.

The drab and somewhat boring yellow walls were covered in a beautiful intense green. The wall-to-wall furniture look was thrown out and I purchased a big beautiful white bookshelf to house the books which have shaped my ideas and molded me. The oppressively large TV was moved from an awkward position in the room into the closet where I can shut the doors to the pervasive influence of MTV streaming seamlessly into my brain. Photos of my family, my friends, and my ideas of beauty were framed and hung on the verdant walls.

After everything was done and I sat back on my crisp white bed. I felt calm and secure knowing that this, at least, was within my control. This was a choice I could make without having to worry about it's repercussions on anyone else. This was something that I could take total selfish pleasure in, and not feel the least bit guilty for doing so.

Happy New Year

This is officially the longest break from real life I've taken in the last 3 years and it is a little weird.

It reminds me of the one summer growing up that my sister and I weren't enrolled in a million sports and science summer camps. We were both too young to get jobs, but both felt we were too old to go to the myriad of art/soccer/science summer classes that had previously filled our youthful summers. That summer I started every day at 10 am with a rousing game of the Price is Right. Bob Barker was my best friend that summer. Between my shouting "Bet a Dollar" and my spoonfuls of Trix I would think of ways to best ignore my little sister that day.

Following Price is Right there were old reruns of Golden Girls and Murder She Wrote on TNT. Ahhh, the good old days of quality programming. I learned many lessons from both Bea Arthur and Angela Landsbury that summer. After those two shows TV degenerated until it sunk below even my low standards (this was my pre-MTV phase).

After my day of TV I would eventually get showered and put some clothes on just in time to make myself a hot pot of Kraft Mac 'N Cheese. Oh how deliciously those orange bent tubes of joy slid down my accepting and grateful gullet. I still remember the day I decided to replace the 1/4 cup of milk with just more butter and created the most tasty blue box concoction. That day will remain in my memory as one of those shining days of youthful bliss.

Anyway, the afternoon was usually filled by some scheme to get my little sister in trouble while I got to do something I'd always wanted to. It usually went something like this:

Older sister sitting lazily on the couch, younger sister walking around doing who knows what.

With the careless air of only the most scheming of evil geniuses, the older sister pipes up, "Maggie, wouldn't it be cool if we could slide across our hardwood floor like a slip 'n slide?"

Turning on her heal, the younger sister is immediately entranced by the idea and said, "yeah, that would be fun."

With feigned submission the older sister would retort, "yeah it would, but too bad the floor isn't slippery enough."

Like she had be dealt a killer blow, the younger sister would visibly deflated and reply, "yeah, it isn't slippery."

If it had been left at that, nothing else would have ensued. Just as the younger sister was about to walk away and start doing whatever it was that she was doing before, the older sister piped up, "if we could only think of something that would make the floor more slippery. Maggie, can you think of anything that we use on wood to make it more shiny. Anything at all that is in the house and we use sometimes to clean the wood china hutch. If you could I would "PLEDGE" to you that I'd help you use it to make the floor more slick."

For a moment the younger sister racked her brain and then, after a minute of further prodding she guessed, "Maybe...well...the pledge?"

Quickly the older sister reinforced the idea, "yeah, good idea Maggie, we'll pledge the floor and then slide around on it in our socks. Here's the can and some rags and our slipperyist socks."

Two hours later the mom returned to a greased spot on her hardwood floor and two very guilty children.

Today I'm at home, with my sister, while my parents are both at work. After having watched The Ellen show, I don't really know what to do with my day, but something tells me that Maggie's husband won't let me talk her into pledging the floor to make a slip 'n slide. And I can't very well do it myself. I wouldn't want to get in trouble.

Cereal Bar

My little sister loves cereal, and when she was little that was all that she really ate. She would eat it 5 times a day if our mom had let her.

As a joke, I asked the caterer at her wedding to let me set up a cereal bar the the end of her food table. This is my cousin Hil enjoying the very fancy and refined bowl of Lucky Charms at my sister's wedding.

Credit or Debit?

Is it wrong of me to like going to the mall this time of year?

I like to go and sit and watch the quiet desperation of the other frantic shoppers as they cruise the mall.

Last minute shoppers come in many shapes and sizes and the Jane Goodal in me finds a slight thrill in observing them in their natural habitat.

The first breed of procrastinator is the most common. It is named the ambler. The ambler slowly goes from store to store in search of something that will suffice. No gift is very important, merely a formality to which the ambler must conform. It sees something, slowly checks the price, tilts the head roughly 7-9 degrees to the right. A small shrug follows and the entire experience is wrapped up. The ambler goes out to its car, takes forever to get in and pull away. On the way home ambler wonders what the point of the whole thing is anyway. It really doesn't make much sense to the ambler.

The ambler is the bane of the next breed's existence. This breed is so intense it usually dominates the entire season. It is very territorial and can make it's target from half the mall away. The Maelstrom. While the ambler slowly weaves from side to side, the Maelstrom can often be found snaking close to the walls where there is least mall traffic congestion. The Maelstrom can size up a store in a second and make a killer bee-line for the gift in question. The Maelstrom comes to the mall with a list, a map of the mall layout, and battle plans A-E. If plan A is foiled, say by an ambler blocking the path to the goal, the Maelstrom can seamlessly transition to plan B. The Maelstrom will have done research to determine the optimal time and place to achieve each objective. Professions most prone to becoming Maelstroms: Green berets, CPA's, Army Generals, Soccer Moms.

The ambler has a vacant, confused look in their eyes while at the mall. Conversely, the Maelstrom is emotionless and cold. The third type of last minute shopper has a derailed, hopeless and slightly strained look to their countenace. They seem to be lost in oblivion, wandering from store to store. A quiet desperation fills every action of the seeker. The seeker comes with a mental list of their loved ones and no ideas about what to buy to demonstrate its love. It is looking for that perfect gift that, on Christmas morning, will produce the same feeling in someone else that it had the morning it received that bike/puppy/dollhouse, or slot car track. It wants to see tear filled eyes look up from the joyously ripped away paper and suddenly know that the recipient understands its love. It will go to every store, search high and low with no goal in mind. Then, suddenly, it will enter a store and all light save one glowing pillar falling gently on THE gift will appear. Heavenly hosts will be singing hallelujah as this downtrodden soul will be lifted, exalted, and fufilled. While the gift is perhaps twice the price the seeker had budgeted, it doesn't matter to the seeker because nirvana has been met.

I like watching people and categorizing their searching styles.

It gives me a little boost to see their plight and know that I am done with my shopping. Perhaps a little sick...but is it really that wrong?

Holy awesome weekend!

This weekend I went to two of the best parties I have ever been to....ever.

I'm not really a fan of the big, impersonal party where I don't know anyone and things are crazy. I prefer getting together with people I know and having smallish get together where everyone is involved in the same conversation and you end up laughing all night long.

Friday night I went to my friend Helena's graduation party. Her boyfriend's mother was throwing it for her. I figured that I wouldn't know hardly anyone at the party, and the guest list would be mostly comprised of family members. This situation can be a bit uncomfortable, but I went anyway.

And boy am I glad I did.

The moment the ear doctor (yes, my real live boyfriend) and I walked into the door we were greeted by the most warm, inviting, friendly woman I have met in a really long time. Genuine love just seeped from this woman's every pore. Immediately we were set at ease. The whole night I ended up speaking with the most interesting people who were honestly interested in me and what I was doing. It felt like they were my family. The food was great, the conversation quick and funny, but the most impressive thing about the whole event was that at the end of the night I gave the hostess a big, hearty, sincere hug. She invited the ear doctor and I down to her house any time, and I really believe she honestly wanted us to come back.

Last night my friends Amy and Brett hosted their annual Christmas party/dinner. This year there were 6 couples. 3 of them were celebrating their first Christmas as a married couple, the host and hostess have been married a just over a year, one couple just got engaged and the ear doctor and I. We've all been friends for almost 3 years now, so the group was the very best of friends. Over dinner of delicious soup and bread bowls we laughed about the process of wedding gift registry. After dinner we sat around and laughed about trips we've all taken together. Over some piping hot wassil we laughed at the white elephant gifts we brought, and afterward we laughed over dishes and putting together the host's house. For one moment I sat in the high backed dining room chair in front of the roaring fire and looked at each face in our circle. I was overwhelmed with appreciation for each person there. I was floored by how lucky I am to have such great friends. I was enamored with the man sitting to my right. I was truly happy in that Halmark, peace on earth, goodwill to men kind of way.

The Line

I know a lot of people don't like the line at weddings, but, lets be honest, it really is an efficient way for the bride and groom to welcome everyone to their party.

This pic was taken from the deck above the line, and I'm actually kind of proud of how it turned out. Kinda artsy.

Warning: ANOTHER post about how great the ear doctor is

I know this blog sometimes gets a little on the effusive side about how great my boyfriend is, but he's just so awesome that he deserves a little recognition.

Last night we went on the perfect holiday date.

First, he had called around and tried to get us tickets to see a Christmas Carol in Denver, but the show was sold out. Plan B, he called around and got all the details about the Christmas lights at the Denver Botanical Gardens.

On my way home from work he called and filled me in.

We decided that the Gardens were for us. Because the garden is in Denver, and he lives between my house and Denver, we decided that it really would make more sense if I drove to his house and then we took off from there. Then he said, "I really want to make sure this is a date and I want to come pick you up." So cute, but in the end impractical. (Even though I really wanted him to come get me too)

Last night was bitter cold and I figured that if we were going to be strolling around outside that I'd really need to bundle up. As I squeezed my arm through the sleeve of my new Eskimo coat I seriously thought about taking one of the 5 shirts off that I was wearing under my sweater, but I'm glad I didn't because it was COLD!

When we arrived at the garden we decided to get the holospek glasses for an extra dollar. Boy, am I glad we did. These glasses were awesome because when you put them on all of the little twinkle lights became shaped like little 6 pointed snowflakes. It was really breathtaking. As we walked around the light filled gardens, I was just plain happy. All along the path they had arched abors covered in icesickle lights dangling down. At the top of each arch there were huge balls of mistletoe. We took advantage of each and every one.

In the middle of the garden they had set up a heated tent where a bell chorus was performing. It was really really beautiful and awesome to watch these people really into their music. One lady looked like the nicest grandma who was obviously a retired kindergarten teacher. When she got really excited by the music she would smile, dance and stick her little tongue out a bit. It was really great to see her that happy.

After the performance we went up and talked to the conductor of the group. With the ear doctor's knowledge of sound and my knowledge of bell making and vibrations/acoustics/physics we had quite an interesting conversation. I love talking to members of interesting little subcultures. They get so excited when someone outside of their circle of acquaintances gets interested in their passion.

After a totally romantic, festive, fun activity, the ear doctor and I tried this new restaurant in Denver. It was amazing. They seated us right by the crackling fire and brough us the most amazing food. I had a fairly simple dish of penne pasta, chicken, carrots and green beans in a lemon cream sauce. The vegetables were so fresh and almost shockingly flavorful. Really, amazing. The ear doctor had the best pork chop I've ever tasted sprinkled with gorganzola cheese (which I found a bit to mold tasting, but he loved it).

On the way home we listened to Christmas carols in the car. Despite my best efforts and raucous singing, I got warm and tired and fell right to sleep mid Joy to the World.

Wow

Holy long-time-without-a-post Batman!

Finals are officially over and I am 1/4 of the way done with my Masters degree. How awesome is that! This semester has been a roller coaster, but I've learned a lot doing it.

1) Prioritizing. There comes a point when I meet my limits and at that point I have to decide what will be sacrificed. Keeping priorities set right guarantees that I will be happy down the road with the choices I make.

2) Having a boyfriend that is willing to be supportive and leave me alone when I need it is crucial. I wasn't sure about how going to school would affect our relationship, but in the end everything turned out great.

3) Realizing that getting an A in a class isn't as important as learning the material. Usually one indicates the other, but sometimes it doesn't, and that's alright too.

4) Serving others keeps my head on straight. I'm so happy I have the chance to serve people through my church position. It is so important for me to remember the needs of others when I am feeling like my world is getting a little too difficult.

5) Staying positive about things really does wonders. Mid way through the semester I didn't think I was doing what I wanted to be doing. I just kept getting more and more negative about school and work. Good thing I got a swift kick in the rear because now I realize I wouldn't rather do anything else.

Eskimos are very smart people

Here in the beautiful state of Colorado we are in the middle of our first really cold spell of winter.

Becuase I have been working in a cubical all day long for the last two years I haven't really paid as much attention to my inventory of coats as I should have.

All I had was a wool pea coat and two ski jackets.

Yesterday I acquired this beauty:

I always thought this type of coat was reserved for rich, yuppy, snobby people who had a house in Aspen that they only used 2 weekends of the year.

Boy was I wrong.

The fur lined hood provides a wind barrier and catches all the little falling snoflakes, holding them far away from my little cold face.

I love this coat and may never take it off.

The fact that it only cost me $42 from Banana Republic doesn't hurt either.

Raging Competitive Beast

or RCB for short.


Saturday night my friends threw a birthday party.

One of the games we played was this candy bar game that is kind of like a white elephant gift exchange. There is a huge pile of candy in the center of a circle of people. You pass a pair of dice around and when you roll doubles you can either take a candy bar from the middle or steal one from someone else. The catch is that if you want to steal you have to remember who had the specific candy and ask for it by name. This twist usually means that as soon as people acquire a little nugget of chocolate goodness they hide it away so no one knows who has what.

Now, it doesn't really matter what the game is, there is a little switch inside my brain that pops up like a turkey timer whenever I'm involved. I've tried to quell it, hide it, deride it, be snide to it, but it just won't go away. I know it is unattractive and not very much fun to be playing against, but it is part of me.

Anyway, throughout the game I kept pointing my finger at other people, lying, and just generally being secretly rotten. In the end, everyone was shocked to see that I had a nice little stock-pile of 7 candy bars to take home with me.

The bad thing is that when I have candy, I don't really eat it.

I store it. I hide it away in the corners of my room. I just like HAVING candy....not really eating it.

Normally, this is just a cute little endearing trait of mine, but recently we have discovered that we have a little mouse problem at my house. They have decided to move right in and become the annoying non-rent paying roommates.

My roommate made the comment, "well, they should pretty much stick to the kitchen because we don't really have any food back in our rooms."

All the sudden the color drained from my face because I, in fact, have copious amounts of sugary confection tucked away all over the place. Places so deep and dark that I have forgotten them and now make very attractive little dens of squalor for these furry little brown tyrants.

This one is a pretty standard shot of the two of them outside the temple. I think they are one good lookin couple.